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AIBU?

to ask SIL not to put photos of me or DC on FB in advance of visit?

5 replies

TerfwithaNerf · 06/07/2017 21:14

I'm taking the DC to visit my brother and his family in a few weeks. SIL (who I'm not massively close to only because they live at the other end of the country) is lovely, not capable of a single bad intention but she has form for putting every single photo she takes at every family event on FB. All of them, the entire camera roll without considering which ones are duds or which ones people might not want made public.

She has put horrifically unflattering photos up there before of my DM, me, her own siblings. My mum is quite image conscious and was quite hurt but too polite to say anything.

I quit FB 3-4 years ago and really don't want her posting photos of me or the DC on there. She is FB friends with lots of my nosy relations and I'd just rather they didn't see photos. Plus I just don't want my DC on there full stop.

WIBU to ask my brother to nicely ask her to not put pics of us on there? I don't want to sound like a demanding cowbag. I wouldn't ask her directly as we never text each other so it would be more weird to do that.

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AnneLovesGilbert · 06/07/2017 21:17

I think it's more than fair to tell them you're not on fb so you don't want photos of your children on there.

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IHaveACrapCat · 06/07/2017 21:19

Very reasonable. My sister is the same, I ask tell her straight not t put anything on FB. Sure she does a cats bum face about it, but am grateful that she complies.

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TerfwithaNerf · 06/07/2017 21:31

Thanks both.

Anne - it genuinely doesn't seem to occur to her that as I'm not on there, I possibly don't want photos of myself or my DC on there. She is well-meaning but just a bit.....unthinking sometimes.

DB is, like me, very private and anti-FB and he gets it so I trust him to deliver the message tactfully but clearly.

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AnneLovesGilbert · 07/07/2017 00:48

Sounds very promising then, I hope the chat goes well, it's a more than reasonable request and she'd be a fool to kick off about it.

Might be a good opportunity to get her to think twice about uploading loads of pix of unwilling models and good for your mum as well! Hope the visit is a success.

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Aquamarine1029 · 07/07/2017 01:09

YANBU. I had to confront my MIL about this same issue. She was posting photos of me and I did not appreciate it. I do NOT want my photo online, and I (and you) have every right to have our privacy respected.

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