To ask you to tell me your wtf moments from this week...?

[bwentinquake]

Today a stranger walked up to me in the street, gestured to my 2yo, and said "She's Downs Syndrome, yeah?".

Dd does not have Downs Syndrome. Nor does her appearance in any way suggest she might do.

So. Weird.

Can anyone beat that?

To me "wee buns" could have 2 possible meanings, both involving words and slang I have never used. The actual meaning wouldn't have occurred to me ever.

Sitting in a queue of stand still traffic. All of a sudden I hear a bang - wondering wtf it was I got out of my car to see a man on a bike getting up off the road. I obviously checked he was ok (luckily he was fine) but a witness said he had literally just rode straight into the back of my car, without slowing down or anything. I had been in the queue for a couple of minutes without moving so wasn't as if I'd slammed my brakes on. That was a WTF moment. Luckily no harm done to the cyclist and minimal scuffs to my car

Jehovah's Witness knocked looking slightly hysterical, started pulling out the magazine thing, I quickly said 'oh no, thank you!' She spun round like a ballet dancer with a flourish and as she disappeared down the path said 'lovely to talk to you anyway'

XH never shown any interest in the DC suddenly 10 years on wants to go to the school awards ceremony. WTF no bloomin help or support ever. Mr million excuses but wants to 'feels he has the right too' displace DH who has parented, funded been there for sickness, challenges, tantrums etc. He donated some sperm after all.

In the last year dh has not bothered to even get me a card for Valentine's Day and our Anniversary.
Last year birthday was an IOU for a night out. I still haven't taken.
This year I had to buy my own gift as GE wasn't sure which one to get me. He paid but whilst out he asked me to buy something for him for the same value. He has an expensive hobby.
So I didn't exactly push the boat out for his birthday which was yesterday.
He moaned to his sister that he didn't get a cake. WTF. He has never brought me a birthday cake in my whole life.
So SIL turns up today with a really elaborate cake for dh. Making me feel totally like shit.

My friend's PFB isn't allowed finger foods in case he chokes (he's 8 months), ok whatever. But I found today that during nappy changes she lets him munch on, and bite bits off, the cheap plastic nappy bags, to keep him happy. Wtf.

Not this week but my mum and I used to visit a cafe regularly. About a month after she died I visited with my sister.
The owner asked me where my mum was. When I told him she passed away he said. "You're joking!"
I think it was shock.

I was walking home around 9.30 the light was just going was with 14yr son and went past park. Nice black iron fence between us. Noticed some people sat near equipment could not make out faces. Hear lend us your phone for £20. We both ignored him. Then heard suck my coc* and another male voice saying it. Then 2nd one saying its a woman.

Then I realise i recognise the 2nd voice......
first voice says half brothers name :O told me to say it and laughing.

Half brother is about 20 yrs younger than me and we only really say hi in the street and small talk not spoke to our dad in over 10 yrs ! He always makes out he is so innocent. I was horrified what if it was a kid by themselves that is no way shape or form funny.

We got further one and i said to son silly idiot I dont' think he realised who we were as it was getting dark and the path was to far away. Not what you want to hear from a relative. Certainly not into incest! We laughed but was so shocked.

I was telling off DS while walking past a car park and Astro pitch on the other side with a football game going on. Not yelling out of control or anything, just voice raised, telling off. A random woman leaned out of her car window with 'Hey! Hey! Is that your son?' I replied 'Yes' and she proceeded to have the nerve to then say 'Oh my God, don't do that' to which I then told her to mind her own business (if DS hadn't been there I would have told her to fuck off) and then she began shouting to him 'Don't listen to her, you did great today!' How the hell would she know, she wasn't there!

WTAF! Mind your own fucking business you nosy trout, bet her kids are those nightmare 'I never discipline my kids' horrors that have no concept of how to behave.

Oriana - that's unbelievably dangerous as well as stupid....

Oriana so not safe. Babies have died from this!

About 20 people (would say aged early 20s?) having a massive row outside my back gate at 4am this morning. Thought I was dreaming then realised I could actually hear 20 people all screaming at each other at once. There was also a young woman in a dressing gown yelling 'LIANNE! LIANNE! COME BACK LIANNE!' for about ten mins at the top of her impressively sized lungs. They seems surprised when I opened the window and told them thanks for waking my kids up, and wandered off still yelling at each other.

Makes a change to the abandoned motorbike that someone dumped there and set it on fire a while ago. The wall of flames I saw as I opened the curtains was a bit alarming.

It's not usually that bad here, honest . There appears to be some kind of fowl keeping business going on in a massive shed down the road though - and we regularly see escaped hens, pheasants, Guinea fowl, turkeys and yes, peacocks wandering round in the middle of the road. God knows what is going on there but assume it's legal as the police have had to come out to help clear the road before?

Oh and I have another.... yesterday I watched a thing on Jack the Ripper and the rise of the tabloid press, interesting premise and insights...

Except it was fronted by KELVIN-FECKING-MACKENZIE who was outraged about the many lies the star printed in order to sell papers....

Also I had a lovely but very batty lady knock on my door with a survey about power cuts yesterday. She couldn't fathom how to use the tablet she had to input my answers, so scribbled them down on a tatty envelope instead. Then gave up halfway through and said oh I'll just try and remember what you said later! Then she gave me a battered £10 note for doing the survey, out of a carrier bag she was carrying round! It was all very odd, I never do surveys normally but she was hilarious and also didn't give me a chance to say no. I checked and no one robbed me while she was at the door

Offred and Stargirl I did tell her it was a v v bad idea, hopefully he won't be chewing them again!

Ordered an Uber, but when it arrived there was an old 'still trying to be rock n roll' man complete with blue tinted glasses, massive silver rings and pin stripe suit sat in the back. I had to glare at him to get him out (the driver was useless) and when he finally did, he said to me 'you don't mind if I get back in and you can drop me off at the post office do you?

What, share my Uber with a random stranger, go out of my way regarding my route and pay for it??

Actually, yes I do!

This happened not an hour ago. Walking in from the back garden with two bags of dog shite in my hand, DH (following me up the steps) decides it will be funny to flick my ass HARD. I stumble up the stone steps in my flip flops, land on the hand holding the dog shite, scrape the skin off and burst the bag open. He thinks this is fucking hilarious, I'm screaming with a gash filled with crap.
I fucking hate him. I've washed it, bled it, got some alcohol wipes on it and he has made up a little song about it. TWAT.

Sammienic have you got any tea tree oil? It's a very strong antiseptic (and anti-fungal but that's not relevant here). He shouldn't be laughing when he's caused you pain and possibly infection.

This wasn't from this week, but a pp reminded me of something that happened on a very recent holiday.

Going on a excursion with two other couples from the same hotel. The tour guide asks where I was from and I replied that I was from Sheffield.

One of the women in the group makes a loud gasping noise and says "but we thought you were Russian!"

I've no idea why she would think that, or what a Russian is supposed to "look like". Mind you, I have been asked if I am German before... Nowt so queer as folk...

Impatientwino I'm so sorry for what you went through, losing a baby. Your words almost made me cry.

But that woman at the venue left me boiling with rage... how could ANYONE think ut's ok to say what she did!?!? If I'd been with you she's have got a mouthful from me. And I hope you went and booked an alternative venue and told her why!!

Someone I already didn't like used the arm rest of my wheelchair to perch her bum on. She had previous for kicking my crutch out of her way as well. Bewildering, that anyone would think that ok.

IloveBanff, I Googled the problem and the first hit was a rugby player almost losing his foot after falling in the pitch and being infected with dog poo!! NOT to be laughed at, I'm furious!!

Yesterday whilst stuck in traffic saw a man waiting to cross road merrily picking his nose and eating bogies 3 times.
This morning when driving my son to swimming saw a rather large male cyclist wearing an all in one wrestling type spandex suit which had a completely see through panel over his bum perfectly exposing his whole crack.

Today at work a lady called me to complain that the traffic lights near her house were hooked up to her meter and therefore she shouldn't have to pay her full bill (I work for an energy company) This will not be true but some people think these things so I tried to reassure her etc. The bit that was wtf was half way through the conversation it became clear she meant hooked up to her gas meter! Gas powered traffic lights, who knew!

I asked my mum for her box (pill box to fix the hinge) and she said 'why do you want to see my cock'!!!!
WTAF mother! You don't have a cock & if you did I wouldn't be asking to see it... It's not an episode of Jeremy Kyle 🤤