AIBU to think it shouldn't be this difficult for find somewhere to live

[starshaker]

I am doing everything I can to find somewhere. I need to move ASAP. Why is it so difficult to find somewhere when you have pets and are on DSS. I can't find anywhere.
I am on the homeless list but if I accept that then I can't take my dogs and I will lose all my stuff.
Its a complete nightmare

[starshaker]

He uses my back garden because I have a tap

[Kezi4]

Does he have a right of access?

[starshaker]

No

[HipsterHunter]

No private rental is going to want a bleeding puppy - they are destructive as fuck.

How does he get into your back garden to use the tap?

Had he made any attempts to contact you? Access your house? Him or family threatening you?

[Kezi4]

Then you could send a letter asking him to stop, either directly or via the housing association. Presumably you're paying for the water, so that's reasonable.

[Kezi4]

Honestly OP, you've shat on your own doorstep here.

Keeping up a long-term emotional affair with your married next door neighbour, including sending secret dirty pictures is shocking behaviour on both sides, and it's especially stupid if you're scared of his family and have very little hope of moving.

I do feel for you because you're struggling with your mental health and no-one deserves to be sexually assaulted, but I also feel sorry for your daughter, who you've put in a potentially volatile situation at home and who you're considering moving an hour away with barely a second thought just before starting secondary school. Poor kid.

[starshaker]

I know it's all my fault but thanks for reminding me. And he's never destroyed anything. I watch him all the time.

[Kezi4]

Well you can wallow in it being your own fault, or you can follow up some of the suggestions upstream.

Unless you have significant savings you haven't mentioned, you're unable to buy a property and you're unlikely to get a private let due to all the reasons mentioned. You have no friends or family to stay with. Making yourself intentionally homeless would be an incredibly unfair thing to do to your daughter (and isn't an option for you, due to a puppy).

Do you have savings that could be used as an additional damage deposit allowing you to try to find a private let? If not, are you able to save?

Currently, your best option is to make life bearable at home, minimise your risk from the neighbour, and continue trying to move via the housing association:

• Continue no contact with the neighbour. If you don't want him in your garden, you can request he no longer uses the tap via the housing association.
• Expand your search for a swap with the housing association to smaller properties and/or a wider area. Call them and see what they can offer and where. Have you done this?
• Make your house a more appealing prospect by decorating / clearing up so any people who view are more likely to want to swap
• Stop drinking; your behaviour when drunk is unacceptable
• Continue working with mental health professionals and taking your medication. Stop forming unhealthy relationships with men until you've sorted yourself out. Prioritise your daughter. Take some responsibility for yourself.

Sorry if that sounds tough OP, but you live in a country in the midst of a housing crisis. No-one can up and move instantly for free.

If you feel you or your daughter are in any actual danger at any time, you need to call the police.

[Justhadmyhaircut]

I am a dog owner and rent privately with dc. .. As a parent your commitment to your dc outweighs the one to your pets. Give the puppy back to whoever gave you it. Offer a pet bond to a landlord (we payed £100 per dog) for the older dog - assuming it's house trained. . The council should have a list of ll that take hb. .

[starshaker]

Ill work something out

[CremeFresh]

Or , you could get your mad up and tell him never to come near you again .

[scurryfunge]

Can you rent in a rural area? Rental farm properties are more likely to allow pets.

[starshaker]

I am calling every property I can find. Its mostly the DSS thats the biggest problem and the fact I don't have a guarantor. I have the deposit and rent pretty much sorted and I am even prepared to pay more than just what HB covers just so we have somewhere else.

[starshaker]

I have now sorted temporary care for my dogs which takes the pressure off a bit. It means when I am offered temporary accommodation then I am able to take it