Train etiquette

[moomoose]

The person sitting opposite me on the train (it's a long journey - 2.5 hours) has taken their shoes off, put their feet on the seat next to me and started what sounds like a long phone call. Either of these things in isolation wouldn't be too bad, but somehow the combination of their wriggling toes approx 30cm from me combined with being forced to listen to their inane chat is driving me MAD.

So, I can take it, give me your honest opinions. AIBU to want to KILL them? Or am being ridiculous?

Oh god no I hate it when people use a long journey to catch up on a phone call.

its always loud and no it is not the same as hearing two people have a conversation. I don't give a shit about your Auntie Doris and her cracked pipes. No I don't care that you might have a chippy tea. Shut uuuuuuupppp.

As for the feet. Eeewwwwww.

No, that's disgusting.

That's vile. I'd probably say something - if they didn't look too aggressive...

Bare feet?

Ugh no YANBU to want to kill them, thTs just vile

Yeah the feet thing is gross

Don't think you can do much about the phone call if you're not in a quiet carriage

Awful. Can you move? I move when people breathe too loudly, manspread, eat etc.

I would want to kill them with fire.

That's disgusting! Is there such a thing as a "fart app" that can be downloaded for you to play and try to chase them away?

Killing them is too soft, I would prefer to bungle them in a broken loo and leave them there for the journey.

Socks, not bare feet. I'm a pussy so haven't said anything, but may well try the fart app. Or maybe just playing with my ringtones?

If it wouldn't annoy everyone else I'd just listen to my podcast out loud rather than through my headphones and wait for the inevitable hard stare before following up with 'oh, is this bothering you? Yeah, loud noises on trains are a pain, aren't they. If only I had headphones! Oh well.'

As a teacher I immediatley respond as I do with pupils 'Could you take your feet off the seat please?' in a firm, no nonsense voice and without emotion. Many people, including adults, have a reflex response of doing what they are told!
However, having been left this long it is a bit more tricky but an honest answer of 'I don't like it.' if they ask 'Why?' can also get results.

Gross, gross, gross.

I'd ask the attendant to speak to them. You're not really supposed to put feet on train seats as far as I know.

What works for me is putting perfume on. If they complain about that then I'll counter with their stinky feet.

I think you can be fined for putting feet on seats I may have imagined that tho

Have you got deodrant or perfume that you can sort of spray at the feet?

oh no, if only you could find that thing in your bag... throw it on the seat next you and start rummaging

The feet thing is rude and grim. I don't know if o could bring myself to say something, but I'd be judging hard.

Yep, I would ask the person to take their feet off the seat too in a firm school teachery voice.

The best way to deal with the long, loud conversations is to join in. Laugh when they do and make the occasional comment. They soon stop.

'Accidentally' plonk your bag down on their feet and then go "oh sorry - I didn't realise you were allowed to put feet on the seats "

Alternatively, don't say anything and start tickling their toes

The phone call finally ended, and the closing comments were 'I'm going to sleep until London now anyway, see you this evening'. AH HA! I'll wait till they look asleep then my phone alarm might go off, accidentally. Must have forgotten to turn it off. Oops!

Have plonked my bag down on the seat accompanied by a HARD STARE and they did move their feet. Looked put out though.

Is it a man, though? You have not divulged, OP... I cannot imagine a woman doing the shoe/feet thing. Taking shoes off discretely, yes. Talking bollocks on phone for far too long, sadly, oh yes. Shoes off/feet up? Can't see it, it's gotta be a man!
Tell us!

It's time to get your own back, yes set the alarm, make any phone calls, listen to music something really irritating, just as he's dropped off ask him if he has a pen you can borrow, all of which should be done with no shoes on.

Yuk to the feet. I'm on a train right now and I'm sweltering and want to take my shoes off but wouldn't. I've got a twat on the train with me too. My foot was a bit in the isle so this bloke kicked it and swore at me as he walked past. Bastard.

Ha ha, it was a woman! I started playing games on my phone, with the sound on. Only because everyone else around us got off. And I didn't do it for long. But I feel I made my point.

Off to the pub forsoon, so that's something!

I wouldn't care about the phone call, I can tune people out if I need to. The feet though... I'd have to accidentally spill something on them.