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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think she should have minded her own business

17 replies

HarmlessChap · 04/07/2017 14:50

A plus-size US model has been widely praised for confronting a passenger accused of sending "mean and ugly" messages about her during a flight.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-40479311

What he messaged to his mate wasn't very unpleasant I agree but if you are going to read other people's personal communication then surely seeing something you don't like is a risk you take.

OP posts:

toolonglurking · 04/07/2017 15:18

From what I've read, she didn't seek to read his personal messages, but because they were in such close proximity it was very obvious.
I think she handled it well, it must have been an awful and very embarrassing experience for her.

QuiteLikely5 · 04/07/2017 15:25

He was being out of line and he was caught red handed.

You are a fine one to talk about minding ones own business given you have posted about someone else's business

Bluntness100 · 04/07/2017 15:29

What are you trying to say op, she should have said nothing and accepted his behaviour? Sat silently as he sent insults about her to his mate? I really hope that's not what you are saying. If you are saying that then stop being a twat.

MissionItsPossible · 04/07/2017 15:30

I feel sorry for her IF it's true but maybe he had a point if she was so close to him that she was able to read his text messages.

EDIT: Oh, it is true as I just watched the video on Facebook. She was very eloquent and wasn't rude to him at all and handled herself well. I don't get why she tweeted the airline though and how they "were going to take care of it for her". He was sending private messages, he wasn't screaming abuse at her and disrupting the flight.

TipTopTipTopClop · 04/07/2017 15:33

She's promoting her modelling career.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 04/07/2017 15:53

So she was supposed to sit there like soft Sal and let him text what he wanted. Fuck that.
Would you put up with that. I dont think so. !
I doubt he'd have said that if a "fat" bloke was sitting next to him.
Oh and it was very much her business. Therefore YABVU.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 04/07/2017 15:55

It must have been an awful and embarrassing experience for her.

She's not the nasty fat shaming cunt.
She has nothing to be embarrassed about

MissionItsPossible · 04/07/2017 16:00

So she was supposed to sit there like soft Sal and let him text what he wanted. Fuck that. Would you put up with that. I dont think so. ! I doubt he'd have said that if a "fat" bloke was sitting next to him. Oh and it was very much her business. Therefore YABVU.

Oh yes he would have. He would just be more likely to shit himself if the guy confronted him afterwards rather than laugh in his face like he did with the woman.

lanouvelleheloise · 04/07/2017 16:07

Watch the video where she confronts him. She does REALLY well, but she keeps his face out of it and protects his identity. Classy response.

Serialweightwatcher · 04/07/2017 16:22

It is her business when someone is being rude about her for no reason and making it blatantly obvious - he's not 4 years old and should have respect

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 04/07/2017 16:24

My nephew is 4 and even knows not to be rude and insensitive to others.

witsender · 04/07/2017 16:49

If you're going to be a rude shit be prepared to be called on it.

witsender · 04/07/2017 16:50

And look at the photo, he is hardly squished. Just being a dick.

goodnessidontknow · 04/07/2017 17:18

It was unpleasant of him but she must have been really looking over his shoulder to see all that.
I agree that it isn't appropriate to comment about a person's physical characteristics, he was in the wrong there. From his perspective though, if you don't fit in a standard seat you should accept that and follow the policy for people of size. Paying for extra legroom in this scenario is just deluded, it's not additional leg room she requires! I completely understand why he was loudly huffing, I would be too if someone encroached like that on my seat space.

Original poster

HarmlessChap · 04/07/2017 17:21

What are you trying to say op, she should have said nothing and accepted his behaviour?

What behaviour? He was having a private text based conversation.

What I'm saying that choosing to read other people's screens while on public transport is extremely rude and invades an individual's privacy. I'm staggered at the universal opinion that its perfectly fine to read the messages of the person sat next to you and I hope I'm never sat next to any of you on the bus.

The guy is clearly an unpleasant idiot but he is entitled to hold opinions about others in exactly the same way that we do about him, but he wasn't rude to her, he was rude about her to a friend; unless he was holding his phone in front of her face then she will have had other places to look but she chose to read what he was messaging and didn't like what she read.

In other words if I was on the train and the person next to me text their friend "OMG the guy sat next to me is so ugly he could get a job in a freak show" it would be a nasty thing to read but I shouldn't be reading it so I would be equally out of line if I did.

OP posts:

BoneyBackJefferson · 04/07/2017 18:02

HarmlessChap

So equally she should be able to film him being a dick and put it on line?

MissionItsPossible · 04/07/2017 18:16

I'm with HarmlessChap on this one. Although I admire the way the woman handled herself and acted with class in the video, at the end of the day she read his text messages. Not only did she do that but she took photos of his messages and then made a video confronting him and then posted it publicly on Facebook. That is an invasion of privacy as it equally would be to open a letter and read it that's been accidentally sent to you. My stance on this may be because I don't use Facebook though and so don't understand the need or lure to post everything publicly.

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