I have two DDs, haven't been in a relationship with their father for over ten years. A couple of years ago he got in to some serious trouble and as a result DDs don't see him, only supervised contact was initially allowed after a safeguarding enquiry to see if I could keep them safe by not allowing unsupervised contact. Of course I could.
Ex has a female friend, he denies she is his girlfriend as she is already married, but DDs are sure that they are in a relationship due to their behaviour - I didn't push for details.
This female friend is the subject of my AIBU - let's call her C. Ever since she's been on the scene she seems to have took on a step mother role to DDs. I initially thought this was something I just needed to get used to, until I learned that she'd had her own children removed by the local authority due to failing to keep them safe from harm (her DD had been sexually abused by a family member and C was allowing (and in fact colluding in) unsupervised access. I learned this around midnight one night when a mutual friend of ex and I rang to ask if I knew where my DDs were. I instantly spoke to ex (this is prior to his own sexual offence conviction) and said I didn't want DDs having unsupervised contact with C.
However, C wouldn't back off, culminating in her giving out DD2s name and address for some random online thing - I only found out when we received a letter in the post. I have a long, long history of family dramas and am deliberately very careful over who gets my address etc - even my full name. I saw red at this point and told C to back the fuck off. She still didn't but I blocked her on all the usual sites.
The most recent drama has been going on since ex's conviction a couple of years ago, one message asking if DDs could join her and ex on a family meal to celebrate his birthday, she would supervise. Then I started getting messages from ex via her, and she was attempting to contact DDs without my knowledge. I have sent numerous messages telling her not to contact me or my DDs, that we were not and never will be friends, and she is certainly not some kind of step mother to my DDs. Things got so bad a few month ago that I actually contacted ex's probation officer and police contact to warn that if the contact didn't stop then I would be taking it further.
The police went round and had a word. The very next day C emailed to ask if we could meet up at a soft play to chat while ex played with DDs. I ignored.
Then today I have had yet another saying that she had saw something advertised and wondered whether it was something that we would be interested in - you know, the kind of message you would send your friend, not someone who has reported you for basically stalking
I know I need to do something, but I'm unsure what. I can't afford solicitors fees, as although I'm on income support I know there's strict criteria for legal aid. Please can anyone advise what I could do to basically tell her to leave us alone?
(Sorry for marathon post!)
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18 replies
Namechangecentralstation · 03/07/2017 19:41
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