A MIL one

[justilou]

My mother in law lives a long way from here. (5hr flight + 7hr drive). She has just spent two weeks here. I ignored the digs and kept myself perky, then on the last night before she left, she was looking for an argument, and started making racist statements that she knows are unacceptable in this house, and threw a tantrum when neither my husband nor I allowed that conversation to continue. (Think storming off and slamming doors 🙄🙄🙄)
Anyway, tomorrow is my eldest daughter's thirteenth birthday, and she has posted a crappy jewellery box shaped like Cinderella's pumpkin coach (?) AND it was wrapped in Dora the Explorer paper. WTAF???
AIBU to think that no grandmother who has spent two weeks with her granddaughter could be so far off the mark unless it's a deliberate dig? Who does that to a kid???
I want to say something, but doubt there's any point. (Not sure if my husband is going to say something, but he's underwhelmed, to say the least...)
To be fair, she also put some money in her birthday card, and my daughter's happy with that.

I would say nothing. She's looking for a reaction and a big fight.

Have your DD write a polite thank you note and never mention it again.

Put the jewellery box on eBay or in the bin, and be grateful she doesn't live closer to you!

Sell it on a local selling group on fb and let your DD use the money for something she'd actually like!

You've posted this twice

Your MiL sounds awful, and it is rubbish that you have to deal with that.

However, I don't understand why you are so upset about the gift. Surely 13 is old enough to realise that sometimes you don't get exactly what you want. Her Grandmother took time to buy her a gift, wrap it, post it and include money. It is the thought that counts. Do you not think that your previous experience with your MiL might be colouring your tone in the way you approach this? I don't think you would be as angered if it was anyone else doing this.

What, exactly, do you want to say? 'The gift and money you took time to buy, wrap and post to us was not up to our standard. Please only send money in future.' A tad entitled and grabby, no?

Have your daughter send a thank you note to her Grandmother for taking the time to buy her a birthday gift, and just move along. You don't need to say anything else. It isn't like this is her only birthday gift.

My grandmother was a terrible gift giver, but I very quickly learned that if I complained about any of my gifts, my mother would take my grandmother's gift AND one of the gifts my parents gave me away to teach me about how rude it is to complain when someone buys you a gift. it was a good lesson in always being gracious and appreciative when someone takes time to buy you a gift, even if it wasn't to your taste.

It was a Jewellery Box that might be a tad infantile, however, it's not like the grandmother bought her a weight loss book or other deliberately cruel gift.

she sounds awful op but i cant see whats wrong with the jewllery box it sounds nice to me and teh paper whilst young have been all she had lying round - does it matter.

Your poor MiL.

I've taught my children that they should not equate the quality of the present with how loved they are. Some people are not good gift buyers.