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Original poster

How did you deal with turning 40?

85 replies

BeyonceZ · 02/07/2017 22:26

I'll be 40 in a year's time (turning 39 soon) and I just can't wrap my head around it.

Does life drastically change? Do hopes and dreams change?

OP posts:
TheSockGoblin · 02/07/2017 22:58

Meh. I don't think it should be a big deal and it's sad that it is for many people.

tigerdriverII · 02/07/2017 23:00

Had a baby. Took my mind off it! DH bought me a lovely bunch of tulips Grin

Poppiesway1 · 02/07/2017 23:02

Im 40 in 16 days time. I'm not coping with t at all. I'm gutted. I was pregnant at 21(so no going out drinking) breastfeeding at 30 (no drinking or going out) spent the majority of my 30's escaping ex dp and just feel so sad and that I've got to 40, still struggling with life alone with my dc and how things have ended up.

My close friends don't live in the same country anymore and a work colleague has arranged her birthday night out on my birthday so no celebrating for me either on that day. I'm not looking forward to it at all Sad

ParadiseCity · 02/07/2017 23:02

Had a weekend away and a meal out, cocktails, told everyone how special they are and I reeeeelly luv them.

It's nice being 40. I feel lucky to have made it so far.

notanevilstepmother · 02/07/2017 23:06

Had a lovely weekend with DH in a posh hotel with a very very naice bathroom.

Other than that, no drastic changes to hopes and dreams etc.

Spoil yourself and enjoy it.

YolandiFuckinVisser · 02/07/2017 23:07

I went to see Frozen at the cinema. Worst birthday ever

Floisme · 02/07/2017 23:11

I had a baby too. It was a wonderful time - best of my life so far.

Stopandlook · 02/07/2017 23:14

I was 7 months pregnant, so it was just a distraction and an excuse to get together with friends really....

WishfulThanking · 02/07/2017 23:14

It's nice being 40. I feel lucky to have made it so far.

What a lovely post, paradisecity

Herbpatch · 02/07/2017 23:14

People who think 40 needs to be 'dealt with' at all are slightly odd, imo.

WishfulThanking · 02/07/2017 23:17

herbpatch, I think you're being disingenuous there. We live in a youth-obsessed culture. If you're a woman you're taught from a very young age that around that age you will soon be irrelevant

Gwenhwyfar · 02/07/2017 23:22

I dealt with it by thinking I'd do something interesting to celebrate so there was at least something to look forward to. I didn't do anything in the end, but I suppose it's not much worse than being 39.

Gwenhwyfar · 02/07/2017 23:23

"I feel lucky to have made it so far."

Eh? Life expectancy's 80. Did you expect to die before 40?

SeagullsStoleMyChurro · 02/07/2017 23:25

There's nothing to deal with, really. It's just something that happens if you don't die first.
I did go to Barcelona though. That was fun.

WishfulThanking · 02/07/2017 23:26

Nothing like taking your life for granted, huh, Gwenhwyfar ? Hmm

Herbpatch · 02/07/2017 23:27

Not at all disingenuous. It's absolutely possible to resist that kind of pressure, maybe not when you're a teenager who thinks they're not pretty or thin enough, but by the time you're 40, I think only the most naive and passive woman is hasn't figured out that youth is fetishised because it fuels an industry based on selling women 'solutions' to imaginary problems.

ijustwannadance · 02/07/2017 23:29

I'm 39. I think I was more upset turning 20 because it meant having to grow up.

Life goes fast. Blink of an eye. It's just another day.

I did however think I would've had my shit together by 40. I don't feel grown up enough yet!

BenLui · 02/07/2017 23:29

We had a huge party with lots of lovely food (cooked by someone else!) a live band, lots of friends and family and a very beautiful cake.

It was relaxed and lots and lots of fun.

We also had friends and family staying with us so we ate and drank up all the left overs the next day.

Being in my forties is considerably more fun than being in my thirties.

TittyGolightly · 02/07/2017 23:29

I'm 40 later in the year and I can't wait.

Age is something to celebrate. I have friends and family that will never see 40 having died young. It's a privilege to get to a milestone birthday and I'm going g to love every minute of it.

JuicyCake · 02/07/2017 23:30

I was looking forward to a new phase in my life. Being a proper adult, I suppose... It's fine so far (still feel like a girl)!

WhereDoesThisRoadGo · 02/07/2017 23:32

At almost 29, I felt the same about turning 30. So I put together a list of 30 things to do before I turned 30. Everything from changing careers to learning a mew cooking style. I achieved all but one by my birthday and felt amazing as a result. 4 years later, I am still proud of all I achieved.

Changednamejustincase · 02/07/2017 23:34

I didn't even think about it. Have been 40 for months and am yet to think about it. I'll think about getting older and life and so on on my 50th.

TittyGolightly · 02/07/2017 23:36

Eh? Life expectancy's 80. Did you expect to die before 40?

At 3 I lost a sibling (rare blood disorder)

At 6 a best friend (murdered by a parent)

At 13 a school friend (epilepsy)

At 18 a friend I'd known since I was 7 (leukaemia)

At 21 my best friend's brother (aged 18 - car accident)

At 28 my cousin (had a heart and lung bypass as a teen)

At 33 a school friend (cervical cancer)

At 35 a school friend (overdose while homeless)

So no, I don't assume anyone will live to 80.

cardibach · 02/07/2017 23:43

I'm always baffled when people worry about age milestones. It's all so arbitrary. And, as PPs have said, getting older is better than the alternative.
Your worry is particularly incomprehensible nought OP. Do hopes and dramas change? Why on earth would they Confused

cardibach · 02/07/2017 23:44

Though not nought. Daft phone.

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