To be freaking out about my future?

[Mummadeeze]

I am really after some life advice here as I have always been very much a live for the moment person and a risk taker, but I am slowly starting to realise that my old age will be very hard if I don't start making changes and better plans. I am 43 and have one DD aged 8. We live with my DP (her Dad) in a small rented flat in a fairly expensive area of London (but we want to stay there at least until our DD finishes primary school). I have a good job and earn a decent salary (50k) but I more or less support my family on that (as my partner has English as a second language and has a minimum wage income type job). He does all the school related stuff and is a good Dad, plus he does work - just doesn't earn v much IYSWIM. So I guess what I am saying is my salary would be good if I was with someone who earned something similar or if we lived somewhere else, but it doesn't go very far at the moment. This means that saving up to get on the property ladder feels like an impossible feat. I have always had a work pension but when I get through the forecasts of what I will get per month when I retire, it doesn't even cover my current rent. So this is what I am worrying about! I can see us having a comfortable enough life with some cheap holidays per year between now and when I give up work, as we do now, but now I am starting to think what on earth will I do when I retire?! How will we survive? Where would I live? Will we get council housing immediately as soon as I retire? I don't really want to depend on this but am not sure how to change things to have a comfortable life when I am old. I know we can move to a slightly cheaper area but obviously still need to be in commuting distance of work and I can not bear the thought of leaving London. Any advice gratefully received. Thanks in advance.

It sounds like you are being very sensible about it and I suspect house prices are about to drop a bit so it might be a good time to start planning. We know a lot of teachers for example who cannot afford to buy even out here in outer London but they buy somewhere they might like to end up living - right in the country or on the coast and they buy as soon as they with that as the plan (and vicars too actually - another group with low wages who want somewhere to live when they are old and retired). If you can buy and let it out to cover the costs but at least have it there for when you are older or when your child is ready for secondary school if you want to move at that stage that can be a good plan.

OP, if going out after work is a regular feature of your life, then that probably goes a fair way towards explaining why you don't have money to spare for that pension pot. Again, you need to think of this as a deliberate choice you are making not to prioritise your pension pot.

And the same for your partner. Every time he chooses to act like a "free spirit" he is making a deliberate choice not to prioritise other areas of his life.

I am not saying either of you has to make the same choices as anybody else, but you should be aware that you are making choices.