To stay out until midnight??

[Illstartexercisingtomorrow]

My friend offered to babysit as it's a special occasion. She won't actually have to look after the kids as they will be asleep.

However the only performance is on late and would mean we return at midnight. We went ahead and booked tickets.

My friend was aghast when I told her I'd be back at midnight. Lots of dramatic eyes and gasps and comments about catching some sleep now etc.

It's made me feel really upset. I didn't think it was that bad? We would be gone 3 hours. She would just be watching tv on our sofa. She did not specify a time that she can start/finish. She lives one road away so not like a long travel home for her either.

WIBU to assume midnight was acceptable?? In hindsight I see I should have checked times but I wouldn't have made any comments or seen it as a big deal if the situation was reversed

Unless either of you is likely to turn into a pumpkin at 12 you are fine to be out till then. .

Let you friend stay in and play with her pearls.

Or get a more liberal babysitter!!

Would be fine with me - I've babysat for friends when we all had younger children - one couple went to a party and got back about 3am.
Midnight would seem perfectly natural to me after a night out - how rude of her to react so badly.

Midnight sounds fine. I struggle to stay awake past 9/10pm though so would probably sleep on your sofa until you returned.

I thought midnight was pretty standard! When I've babysat for friends - or them for us - it's usually turn up between 7 and 8 (depending not on kids bedtime) and veg on the sofa until parents return between midnight and 1. Is it a weeknight? I guess in a weeknight 11pm - midnight is more usual but definitely within the bounds of reasonable!

Did she know ahead of time that you wanted her to start at 9? That should have given her a clue really. I babysit for my neighbour sometimes and usually do 8 till about 11. That involves putting older (6 and 8) children to bed though. Tbh if she said she wanted to stay out till midnight, I'd probably not look forward to that, as she doesn't pay me and I have an early rising toddler - it's just a favour. But I wouldn't do the dramatic eye rolling. That's a bit rude of her. In her shoes I'd probably just say that's a bit late for me to do regularly, but if it's a one off I don't mind.

Can you cancel with her and pay for a babysitter who won't mind (assuming she's just doing you a favour)?

Seems a perfectly normal time to be back to me

We didn't know ahead of time. It's for tonight so a weekend night.

I wanted to leave an hour earlier (still after the kids are asleep) but she came back and asked if she had misheard etc and now instead of being out from 8.30 I will have to go at 9.30.

It is just a favour we are not paying her. But I look after her kids often - never in the evening as she had never wanted it but it's not like it's a one way street.

It's also not a regular thing. Definitely a one off. I don't think I can get a paid babysitter at this short notice, for one thing I don't know any around here. Just shows how often we do actually go out!!

Well now you know not too look after her kids.Midnight is not late, especially if your going out at 9.30.Should have went out earlier and left her to get the kids too bed.