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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not chase contact with my mum?

4 replies

OverTheHammer · 29/06/2017 12:04

I used to ring my mum everyday and it was often hit and miss as to whether I got a decent reception or a pissed off, bored sounding voice at the other end.
I then made it every other day but after having to hear about my sister CONSTANTLY and hearing no interest in what I was doing (and almost disappointment when things were going well for me) I dropped it to around 3 times a week.

My mum NEVER rings me.

Last month it was my birthday and I didn't even receive a card off my sister. No worries. It was her birthday a week or so later so I sent a card as always. My mum was then livid that I hadn't put her any money or gift in it and proceeded to speak to me like shit on the phone and slag me off to the family. They kindly pointed out that I hadn't even received a card on my birthday but it fell on deaf ears. I was fuming.

I dropped contact to once a week.

Anyway I was due to go on holiday on the 16th June so I rang her earlier that week. I would normally ring the day before I go away but I thought I'd leave it to see if she rang me to wish me a happy time of something, she didn't.

I got back off holiday on Sunday. Tried to call her Monday but there was no answer. Tried again later in the day, no answer. She's not bothered to ring me back since and to be honest, I'm getting really fucked off with it all. I know for a fact she'll be going around the family playing the victim saying I didn't ring her before holiday and haven't rang her since I got back but she knows my fucking number!! Why can't she ring me for once?

AIBU to not bother again until she makes the effort to ring me? So fucking passive aggressive it's exhausting. I've spent my life tiptoeing around her, trying not to say the wrong thing which will make her play the victim, nodding along to un-truths just to keep the peace. I'm bored of it.

OP posts:
OverTheHammer · 29/06/2017 12:24

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OP posts:
EnidNextDoor · 29/06/2017 12:27

Leave it. The family whose opinions matter already know what the story is.

HeyRoly · 29/06/2017 12:28

I think you'll probably feel happier if you stop initiating contact Flowers

notfromstepford · 29/06/2017 14:24

I'd leave it too.
I don't phone my mother anymore because she's not interested in me or my family. She only phones me when she wants something or has a problem with her laptop that she needs me to talk through what to do.

Used to really bother me, but honestly, it's much nicer not speaking for as long as possible! Yes she bleats to the whoever will listen that I don't phone, but people who I actually care about know the story, so I am past caring.

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