Should I confront her?

[Ninabean17]

DD1 is in reception year at school.

In her class is a lovely little boy, who has an older brother.

This brother no longer goes to this school (he's roughly 9/10, I'm not sure why he no longer attends) but is regularly there with his mum when dropping off the younger brother.

He annoys the hell out of me.

He jumps on fences. Climbs under them. Pulls over netball hoops. Throws balls at people (footballs. One hit me on the head once) rides and jumps on his scooter (including spinning it in the air in front of people, again, has hit people several times)

My question is this: would ibu to confront his mum? She never does or says anything to him. She occasionally says 'nah don't do that' but that's literally it. She's too busy chatting. She can see what he's doing but chooses not to stop it, if this boy has any educational/physical special needs etc that aren't obvious then I can understand it might be a bit harder to 'control' him but surely she can be doing more?! Aibu thinking this?? Had enough of having to duck out of the way of his fecking scooter

Of course something needs to be said. OP, I think you should speak directly to the mother if it affects you or your DC, otherwise tell the staff.

If his behaviour directly impacts you I.e. When his scooter hits the pushchair then speak to the mother at the time of the incident.
If it's not impacting you other than being understandably very annoying then leave it.

Can't believe people are saying that it's ok for this behaviour to go unchecked. If the child has special needs then the parent should be extra vigilant surely! Definitely have a word with school. Not sure you would get very far having a word yourself. Good Luck.

I think you're going to be in for a shock in the long run.
Best accept quickly not everyone parents the same now to avoid yourself a lot of stress and disappointment.

I agree you need to speak to the school rather than the mother.

SEN is not a reason to engage in these types of behaviours.

Sounds like my nephew who also wouldn't be at school because he got expelled and is currently on the road to a SN diagnosis.

It also sounds like my sister who despite knowing full well what he is like doesn't supervise him very well.

Just because there might be SN doesn't mean that parents don't always do what they should be doing. In fact in my sisters case since it's been suggested he has issues by his new behaviour unit she has relaxed even more what was already pretty relaxed supervision as she just says it's his SNs and nothing she can do.

In your case I would speak to the school in confidence. Don't tell anyone at the school gates you are going to do it as people gossip. Just state you are concerned about safety and nothing else. If he used to attend and now doesn't the school will be well aware of any issues or SnS and wil deal with approximately.

We had a family like this at school out school. The mum kept him home (till he was feral) while she doctor shopped, trying to get a diagnosis that probably never came. I'm over being victimized by kids and parents like this. It is entirely possible that mum is lazy and the kid is simply a little shit because he wants/needs attention from his mum. I would pick up the scooter or ball and refuse to give it back until the mother came to find out why, and explain that as this is a frequent occurrence and she can't be arsed from teaching her kid normal boundaries and manners, and you are fairly sure that she doesn't want to be charged with anything causing harm to your baby, and you will give it back before you leave.

Can't believe people are saying that it's ok for this behaviour to go unchecked

You don't have to believe it as no-one has actually said that at all.

My DS doesn't look like he has autism...but he does!

What's that got to do with anything? Since when was autism the get out clause of bad behaviour?

YANBU OP. I would say something if I felt brave enough.