To hate the bedtime routine

[Happyhappyveggie]

I'm at the end of my tether with the bedtime routine. Every night it descends into shouting as the kids just won't stay in bed. We try every night to keep it calm, to have a bath and then a story and then bed.
Tonight has been the opposite- kids are up and down and up and down and refuse to stay in their beds. In the end I lost it and shouted 'go to bed' and now I feel like the worst parent ever. I dread it every night when it should be a calm time.

Kids are 5 and 9 - the 9 year old is better but still pushes it but the 5 year old is a total nightmare. I try to be patient and calm and read a story but she's often up and down until 10pm.
Aibu to be at the end of my tether- what am I doing wrong? (Apart from shouting obvs- I hate hearing myself when I lose it as feel the worst parent ever)

Sounds like my house, honestly, and by the time kids are finally asleep i am so tired i go to bed myself so we get no time at all to ourselves.
My dc are 3 and 5 i was hoping they would grow out of it.
So no advice just sympathy.

Completely normal in our house too.

Do you put them to bed at the same time?

Well ideally no- the 5 year old would go first. But the 9 year old is a very early riser and if he isn't in bed by 8 then we get emotional meltdown as he's up at 6 every day. The 5 year old just won't go to bed period.

Ignore ignore ignore.

Threaten with removal of tv/I pad tomorrow. Carry it through

My 2 are washing the bed and the walls with flannels. They are still up.