Hi all,
Am a regular but nc.
I'm getting fed up of the housework situation at home and I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable?
Currently at home the housework is split so dp sorts out all cat stuff (one cat, food, water, litter tray) this is only because I'm pregnant and usually would be my responsibility. Dp also does most washing up, takes the bins out and puts his clothes away. We have a DD and he takes her to school in the mornings. Aside from this I do the rest so, meal planning, write the shopping list, grocery shopping, budgeting, washing clothes, I do some washing up as he tends to not do any (bleh) mon-weds and I end up needing something that hasn't been washed yet (otherwise leaving it to show he still has to do it even if he lets it pile up!), I do the cooking, make our bed and vacuum (at the moment due to being 7m pregnant I've only done this once a fortnight because I can't lug the vacuum up and down the stairs too often) and I collect DD from school.
It's also fallen to me to write out a list of everything we need for when baby is here, sort out DD school uniform, and organise the house (we constantly get clutter building up which we all contribute to, but only I sort out and put away)
Now that in itself I personally find unfair, we both work the same amount of hours each week, exact same commute. But here is my current issue:
I have to remind him constantly to do these things. He will happily leave the litter tray for a whole week and not scoop it at all in between, he generally leaves the washing up, does some on a thurs/fri, clears it Sunday and then repeats the cycle. When I write the shopping list he genuinely expects me to go around the house and figure out what's running out of mine and his things. For example I don't drink coffee but I should check if we need it and 'not just expect him to remember'.
He also was constantly leaves a mixture of dirty clothes and clean clothes on the floor and just rifles through it to get what he needs. I started putting the lot through the wash every time he did this so he couldn't wear any of it until it was dried (no tumble drier) he's reluctantly started outing dirty washing in the basket and clean clothes away ready to be worn.
If I'm first out of bed, he won't make the bed when he gets up. He just leaves it unmade. Even if I've gone out so he knows it won't get done. He never hangs the bathmat out to dry, never wipes the shower down after use, never cleans the toilet. And then if I ask he says no because I'm nagging 
I'm just so fed up, so today I told him (have told him in the past it's not okay but it goes in one ear out the other) that I'm not his mother and refuse to baby him. That if he's going to be like this we can swap chores (he thinks he does more than me somehow) and see if he prefers that!
We've had a massive argument about it (not that he looked up from his tablet, mind) and he said that he does more because he has to put up with me as well.
Now, I'm not easy to live with, I was diagnosed last year with social anxiety, and I'm going to various counselling sessions and doing mindfulness to try and help this. But I do tend to ask why things happen a lot and I can get quite agitated and panicky if plans change last minute. But I'm trying so hard to not let this impact on our lives. He's never sat with me through a panic attack (he usually leaves the room or leaves the house) he just has to answer questions/talk to me sometimes when he'd rather I would just not worry about it and leave it.
AIBU? Is he right that he should do less because he also has to deal with my emotions? I just don't know anymore 