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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is he being ungrateful or was I wrong

50 replies

Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 18:45

Won some money recently only about 500 but decided to treat myself two new bags cost 50 pounds for both. Decided to buy my boyfriend some new aftershave he has about 50 different ones has all of a certain brand to. I gave it to him when I came home and his first words where you don't by people perfume or aftershave. I've been brought loads of perfume in the past every one at work got a perfume set for Christmas obviously made sure it was there regular one they like. I told him he was being ungrateful walked off and just cried he then shouted why the fuck you crying over it. I've had a shitty day feeling emotional

OP posts:
hickorydickorynurseryrhyme · 23/06/2017 19:26

Agree he's BU however a different choice of present might have been better given he's already got tons of aftershave by the sounds of it.

Original poster
Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 19:27

Because he collects them every time a new one comes out he buys it

OP posts:
Original poster
Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 19:28

I just beat him to it as he was having a tough month money wise and thought it would be nice

OP posts:
hickorydickorynurseryrhyme · 23/06/2017 19:29

If that's the case a bit odd and ungrateful him reacting like that

UserThenLotsOfNumbers · 23/06/2017 19:33

On the surface yanbu he's being ungrateful and rude
But what could have made him react like this? Not exactly a standard response to receiving a gift?

RoseTico · 23/06/2017 19:33

Take it back and buy yourself some nice perfume instead. If the idiot wants to talk himself out of gifts, let him...

RhubardGin · 23/06/2017 19:38

What an ungrateful bastard, and the way he spoke to you was disgusting.

You don't buy people aftershave/perfume? Eh??

I wouldn't go as far as saying LTB but tell him straight he's being a prick, you won't tolerate being spoken to like that, and you're keeping the rest of the money to yourself!

Spangles1963 · 23/06/2017 19:46

Sounds like the sort of charming remark my ex would come out with.

honeylulu · 23/06/2017 19:49

I bet he expected you to give him half your winnings, hence his displeasure. Nob end. Give him the elbow.

Shootfirstaskquestionslater · 23/06/2017 19:49

Return the aftershave buy yourself something instead and dump the ungreatful prick you can do much better than that and don't cook him a damn thing just direct him to his mum's kitchen because that's where he should be spending the weekend.

Original poster
Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 19:53

He's stormed out saying he would of had dinner with frieends in town and been home and finishing his work by now although he said he dosnt have the time or money for dinner with me apparently I had the attitude for leaving the room

OP posts:
ohfourfoxache · 23/06/2017 19:56

Do yourself a favour. Take the gift back and get rid of him.

Think of it as another big win.

honeylulu · 23/06/2017 19:56

although he said he dosnt have the time or money for dinner with me
Eh? What is he on about?

Foslady · 23/06/2017 19:58

Yep - another one saying that I'd do one last job for him- Pack his bloody bags!

valeriej43 · 23/06/2017 20:00

Sounds to me as if he is jealous of your win, hence the hint about not having the money for dinner, i bet if you had given him half he would have had a different attitude, YANBU

user1495915742 · 23/06/2017 20:02

Huh?

Don't cook him dinner. Take the aftershave back and get a refund. Spend the money on yourself. Oh yeah, and almost forgot, dump him.

Scaredycat3000 · 23/06/2017 20:02

I hate this constant just be grateful for what you're given attitude. I'd be absolutely gutted if I'd been giving totally useless gifts for years and the recipient had lied to me about it. Without your OH's side I have no idea if you've totally missed a point that means you knew it wasn't right or if your OH is genuinely a dick.

DubaiismyBlackpool · 23/06/2017 20:03

Unanimous YANBU and he's not a great - or grateful - boyfriend.

Original poster
Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 20:09

He hasn't had the money for a few weeks had a bug bill to pay for

OP posts:
Foslady · 23/06/2017 20:11

Hmmm. Was the bill something just for him?

Original poster
Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 20:21

Yeah it was but we have completely separate finances except a small joint account for when we go out together as it's a faff trying to half things instead we put 50 in a month

OP posts:
Foslady · 23/06/2017 20:26

Well he can't complain about you not splitting the cash then! - if the bill was just for him, then his issue

WithCheesePlease · 23/06/2017 20:33

That is the weirdest reaction I've ever heard to someone being given a free gift.

Original poster
Busybee233 · 23/06/2017 20:41

If he didn't like the smell or the gift he could of said thank you so much it's so thoughtful example "but I haven't brought it myself because I don't like the smel"l" or "do you mind if I swap it for the other newer one as that's the one I preferred"

OP posts:
Squarerouteofsquirrel · 23/06/2017 20:43

It sounds like he had other plans for your money. He is an ungrateful gaslighting idiot, if he wants to borrow, be given cash then why not just say direct instead of trying to confuse and belittle you.

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