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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Don't think I handled this very well

5 replies

NicolasFlamel · 23/06/2017 17:35

My son is 4 and a half, suspected ASD and currently undergoing assessment if that's at all relevant.
Anyway today he just bluntly said to my mum "You're fat, aren't you."
My mum just sort of laughed it off but I know that can feel so hurtful and I told my son we don't need to talk about other people's bodies. He started crying so I took him to the other room to help him calm down and have a chat. He said he just said it because he wanted to and he didn't mean to be unkind. I said I understood that but people are all different shapes and sizes and we don't need to tell them, they already know.
On reflection I feel like I've told him there's something "wrong" with being fat and it's something to be ashamed of when really he was just being matter of fact and saying what he saw. I'm really conflicted.
Should I just leave it now?

OP posts:
Covfefe · 23/06/2017 18:52

Leave it. I know what you mean about not 'fat shaming' so to speak but the same thing applies to saying anything personal like a spot or a big nose. You handled it fine.

NicolasFlamel · 23/06/2017 19:49

Thank you, it felt a bit like a no win situation. I'll just leave it now.

OP posts:
Chloe84 · 23/06/2017 19:56

I think you handled it well too.

He needs to learn (gently) not to say things that people could find hurtful.

KoolKoala07 · 23/06/2017 19:59

I think you handled it well. We see people from all walks of life/ situations etc and as much as we'd like to speak our minds, it's something we all have to learn to keep to ourselves to protect other people's feelings.

SenoritaViva · 23/06/2017 20:02

Definitely well handled!

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