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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I am? Kind of parking

24 replies

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 12:17

So I come out of the hairdressers and as I reach my car my phone rings I answer it, get in the car, keys in ignition but not turned on and have my phone to my ears I am parked by the tree on the left of the drawing, there is a tight space next to me and a couple of spaces in front of the hairdresser itself plus two more on a road to the side. After a minute a woman drives up and tries to park next to me, she moves along a bit and gets out of her come and stands by my window. I indicate I am on the phone and to give me one minute, she walks away shaking her head. She then parks her car in one of the spaces by the hairdresser, glares over at me whilst still shaking her head. At this point I have finished my phone conversation and was about to leave so I call over. She ignores me. As I drive past she glares, I apologise and say I was on the phone... was I unreasonable not to stop my phone call to see what she wanted ( I guess me to move)

OP posts:

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 12:18

Car not come

OP posts:

GeillisTheWitch · 19/06/2017 12:19

YWNBU. If there was a space outside the hairdressers she could use then what's her problem.

Morphene · 19/06/2017 12:20

YANBU...but as someone who didn't get a space in a carpark today and had to drive another 5 mins and then walk back for 15 mins because someone was on the phone I can understand the frustration....

peukpokicuzo · 19/06/2017 12:22

Ywnbu - I expect she's a dangerous driver who still uses the phone while driving and doesn't see why you shouldn't do likewise. Ignore.

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 12:23

Morpheme, she wasn't waiting when I started my phone conversation and there isn't really anywhere to move to. I could have stood outside my car I guess but it still wouldn't have cleared the space. I wouldn't dream of asking someone to stop their phone conversation so I could have their space..

OP posts:

MsSusanStoHelit · 19/06/2017 12:26

I can see why it's annoying for her - you're right there, you could just move for her if only you would put your phone down/break the law and drive off talking.

But you were not being unreasonable, you didn't know she was coming when you started the call and you can't move off when you're on the call, and if you'd taken it in the hair dressers then she'd still not have had the space.

So YANBU but SWBU for letting herself get frustrated when you didn't do what she wanted you to.

araiwa · 19/06/2017 12:59

Id have told her to fuck off

mama4321 · 19/06/2017 13:23

You might have only just arrived yourself for all she knew

Morphene · 19/06/2017 15:01

op I know - I said YANBU. But it is annoying nonetheless.

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 15:05

Morphene I think I was trying to say that if she had been there before I was on my phone ( so waiting for a space) I would have asked them to call back..

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Morphene · 19/06/2017 15:15

hmm the thing is that she probably wanted to get an estimate of how long you would be...so she could decide whether to wait or not.

Actually it wouldn't have cost you anything to give her that. But you ignored her (probably because you knew it actually wouldn't be long). But she didn't know that.

IF you had told her it was going to be 1 minute then she might have waited for your space. Instead she parked elsewhere and you were gone in no time anyway.

you still weren't unreasonable - you make phone calls how you like when you like, but I can definitely understand her finding it rude that you wouldn't take a second to give her the info she wanted.

Morphene · 19/06/2017 15:20

Sorry - im not being clear...

The point I am failing to make is that it would definitely be rude to expect someone to stop a call to empty a space, BUT you don't know if that is what she wanted because you didn't let her speak.

It ISN'T rude to ask someone in a car park if they are coming or going, and if they are in the process of going, how long they might take. People do this all the time in busy car parks.

That is likely what she wanted to ask, and it isn't likely she was going to ask that you move.

So while YANBU, she isn't being particularly U for feeling annoyed that you wouldn't even take a second to see what she wanted.

PoisonousSmurf · 19/06/2017 15:26

OP you were far too polite. I would have given the bint the 'finger' and stayed longer just to annoy her even more.

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 16:16

But isn't it rude to interrupt a conversation? Which I was having... I wasn't waiting for someone to answer ( or I would have tired later) I was actually a minute into a conversation. I held up a hand to acknowledge her and pointed out I was on the phone..

OP posts:

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 16:18

Tried not tired

OP posts:

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 16:20

But yes I could have asked her what she wanted... I'll put it down as we were both a bit unreasonable..

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HundredMilesAnHour · 19/06/2017 16:22

YANBU. I think she was pretty unreasonable actually. For all she knew, you could have only just arrived, you could have been waiting for someone, etc. You don't go round interrupting a stranger's phone call unless it's very important. Her wanting your parking space isn't important!!

KanyeWesticle · 19/06/2017 16:33

You absolutely didn't need to move. She didn't know you were about to leave. You could have been waiting for someone.

It was rude of her to knock on your car (if she was impatient for you to move) but you were rude to ignore her (just incase she had something else to ask).

malmi · 19/06/2017 18:01

OP didn't ignore her. According to the post she indicated to her that she was on the phone and to 'give her one minute', which is perfectly reasonable.

ilovesooty · 19/06/2017 18:04

I d have told her to fuck off

I remain quite surprised that people really do escalate situations in that way.

Mulledwine1 · 19/06/2017 18:34

I remain quite surprised that people really do escalate situations in that way

easy to be a keyboard warrior, I doubt the poster actually would in real life.

As for the OP, she might have only just arrived.

Ceto · 19/06/2017 18:42

I don't see how you could possibly BU if there were a number of alternative spaces available. What was so special about the one your car was in? Was it particularly near to where she wanted to go to?

People are entitled to occupy parking spaces within legal limits, and it doesn't matter whether you were taking your call whilst in the car or whilst 20 yards away. That's not to say you shouldn't, out of normal consideration, move if the car park is packed, but that wasn't the situation here.

Redsippycup · 19/06/2017 18:54

OP - speaking as someone who had to park at the back of the supermarket carpark yesterday, (to get a space with a gap next to it) because all the p&c spaces were full - 4 of which had people stood around the cars with the doors open and 2 with drivers (and no kids) in the cars - YANBU.

Those people were there before me and they got the spaces. Yes it was irritating to lug the baby seat across the carpark, but I didn't go and knock on anyone's window!

Original poster

Gizlotsmum · 19/06/2017 21:07

Sorry. School run and after school activities and then swimming. It was in the shade which was a bonus. If I had turned the key in the ignition I would have told her I wouldn't be long but it was a call back from customers services over a delayed delivery so I wasn't going to ignore it.

OP posts:

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