Pick your team...

[WoofWoofMooWoof]

Scenario - teacher picks two 'team captains' - always (never heard of or experienced any exceptions) the 'popular' kids. They obviously pick the other popular kids for their teams first, and we all know what happens next.

I was always the last one picked, and then I was only picked because there was nobody else left to pick. I know this is also going to happen to DD1, as she has mild autism, isn't very athletic and has social difficulties.

AIBU to think teachers should just pick the teams, or divide the class in half, or perhaps, just for a change, ask the less popular kids to pick the teams? It's so damaging for a kids to always be the 'outsider' .

My DDs are 8 and in Y4. I've just asked them, and they say it's happened quite a few times. At least DD1 actually got to pick the team once, so not too bad in that respect, but it obviously still happens in primary schools .

Always picked last as I was terrible at all the sports and not just that but when a team realised they had me (as I was the only one left) they would boo

I remember but I really don't care, I'm no good at sports but that doesn't sum me up as a person its just a small part of who I am and stopping situations like this happening at school because you're kids are too precious is just going to end up with them struggling in real life when they are older surely?

Sometimes I don't get the job I want but it doesn't mean I'm worthless just means there was someone else out there better suited to me.....

Dairy - I would hardly call children with LD or autism, who are quite simply unable to understand situations like these 'precious'. Not that they don't try to understand, but they are incapable of understanding, because that's how their brains are wired. I'm not saying all the 'last ones picked' are on the spectrum, but I assume a lot of them are, and something like this could be a real setback for them.

I've been teaching nearly 20 years in primary and have never picked team captains or allowed the children to pick teams for sports. I don't know anyone else who does either. I think it is a very cruel process and totally unnecessary.

Nooooooo woof I'm not name calling kids with autism or learning difficulties!

I'm sorry by the time I read the replies I did forget you had said that about your daughter but what I mean is the way parents treat their kids in general can be a bit precious with this sort of thing which isn't that important and didn't really do us any harm and over the years things like participating awards becoming more popular hasn't really helped anyone's mental state has it?

But yes you're right if the teacher is aware that someone in the class is going to get more upset than usual because of something like autism then a different way for that particular class should be considered.

We can never know individual resilience, especially in previous generations were many children who are now adults may have never rebuilt self esteem may also have undiagnosed conditions. It may do one person no harm, it may even make them stronger but for others that kick in confidence which could have been kicks of many could lead to an adulthood of low self esteem and low expectations.

I hated this at school.

Yes, it would be so much better if the teacher allocated the teams. The unpopular or unsporty kids already know who they are. They don't need it rubbing in every time there's a PE lesson.

This was a permanent feature of my primary school life.
You knew exactly who the last two kids to be picked were - me, the weedy athsmatic and the overweight kid with the permanently runny nose.
What was the point of it really? I knew I was shit at running and athsma meant that would never improve.
Oh the joy when the class was an odd number and I'd get to sit out! The teacher thought she was being terribly cruel and would mock me. Meanwhile I'd be trying to suppress a smile and lurking in the shade.

I was both unpopular and pathetic at sports, so was always left till last - I just became resigned to it.

The thing is dairy milk so many of these conditions remain undiagnosed for so so long & in the meantime children just think they are rubbish. When dd was finally diagnosed Aspergers at the age of 12 she felt it was such a relief to know there was a reason for things. She was always crap at PE but no one thought to correct her strange running style (with her hips turned out) or noticed her hypermobility. She now attends an 'elite' dance school & is fitter than most secondary school kids.

MsPassepartout
The unpopular or unsporty kids already know who they are.

Exactly!

Being the smallest/shortest/most unsporty provided so many opportunities for humiliation. On sports day the teacher insisted I participate, so I came last at running, long jump etc.but the worst was the parallel bar - all the sporty kids jumped and grabbed the bar but I couldn't reach so the teacher would hoist me up until I grabbed the bar to a collective 'aaaaahh how cute' from assembled parents and I would hang, lifeless until my arms felt like they were coming out of their sockets and I would drop into a crumpled heap. That wasn't humiliating enough, whilst other children ran and jumped over the horse, I was lifted up, crawled to the other end and fell off. I suppose it was more acceptable to ritually humiliate children in the late 1940s and 50's.

The result is that I have never felt humiliation since I left school. I learned the hard way to simply not give a fuck. Perhaps I should have thanked that teacher

Oh the joy when the class was an odd number and I'd get to sit out
Haha same here!

Please tell me they don't still do this. The dread of PE lessons. I remember it well.there was one lovely PE teacher that always drew an imaginary line down the middle of the room and split us that way. Happiest day of my school life was in my last year at school when we were allowed to completely drop PE

Unfortunately it still happens Mysterious .

I go around the group and go "red" "blue" - usually alternately because that also splits up best friends who stand together