Disgusted at the care given to my Nan

[LittlePrawn1]

My nan is currently in a home for respite, she's there for 2 weeks. Will be her second week Monday.

She is very poorly (cancer) so I've been visiting every night (We are not sure how long she may have left), carers seemed lovely. At the moment she is quite confused, and sleeping a lot of the time, also refusing food.

Have visited the home this afternoon, she woke just as I was about to leave a carer came to help give her a drink, as she woke up I decided to stay a bit longer, she said to the carer she needed the loo, carer said she needed to give another resident a drink then will be with Nan.

A couple of mins went by and I asked nan if she would like me to take her to the loo, she said no but there was no commode in there anyway.

15 mins later nan rang the buzzer again, two carers came and lifted nan underneath her arms and put her on the commode, repeatedly telling her to move back more. Then left and said ring buzzer once finished. I noticed if I wasn't there, and nan was left alone the buzzer was nowhere near close enough for her to ring!

While sat on the commode I noticed a red bloody mark on her leg, I asked her what happened and she said they (carers) knocked it getting her in/out of bed. I've heard horror stories about homes but also know the elderly can mark easily but I still wasn't happy.

They came back, stood nan up, and pulled her knickers up, I said to nan did you do anything on there? She said yes a wee. I told the carers she needs wiping then... they looked right through me, didn't say a word and put her back into bed! Do care homes really do this now? Not wipe for a wee?

I noticed when Nan lifted her blanket I could smell something too. As I was leaving Nan could tell I wasn't happy and repeatedly said "don't worry I'm fine I'm ok"

I've left fuming and feeling upset that my poor nan is left there!

What did you apart from post on here,we can't do anything,you need to talk to the nurse in charge.

I'm not asking you to do anything, I'm asking for people's opinions. Why bother commenting that

Underarm lifts are completely unacceptable. Not completing personal care is completely unacceptable. Speak to the manager, and if you're unhappy with the answer raise a safeguard with social services. You can also report to CQC.

I'd mention your concerns to nurse in charge, if your gran doesn't like a fuss do it discreetly, x

Under arm lifts are a form of abuse! However it does happen

No need to be rude hot head, why did you even post?

I would have a word with the manager and raise your concers, this is the place she will end her life, she needs to be comfortable and secure.

Sorry about the situation OP you have my sympathies

I will be passing it on to Nan's children so they can speak to nurses etc. I wish I could just take her out but it really wouldn't be up to me to do something like that and even speak to the nurses. I'm the great grand child.

I was just bewildered how they didn't wipe after her going to the toilet?? Do all homes do it if it's just a wee?

I was just bewildered how they didn't wipe after her going to the toilet?? Do all homes do it if it's just a wee?

I don't know, but if so, I think that's rather disgusting.

Does your nan have a habit of downplaying things? Normally, I would assume her saying she's okay means there isn't anything worse going on than you have witnessed, but if she just doesn't want you to worry ...

Your Nan has you to advocate on her behalf. I would enquire about the wound on her leg and also the personal care that leaves a lot to be desired. Ask to speak to the manager or care home owner.

Having worked in 3 care homes i can tell you that this is very very common.

Under arm lifting is for quickness as there is not enough time and staff to left everyone using a hoist or stand aid. Many residents dont like hoists and much prefer the under arm lift. I personally dont like the under arm lift as its back breaking.

I ve known many carers not wipe after a wee if the resident has a pad on.

Wiping someone after a wee might be difficult if they aren't mobile.

As an aside, how old is she?

I am a manual handling trainer for care workers and the under arm lift should not be being used at all, it is pure lazyness on the carers part, they couldn'tbe bothered to fetch a proper hoist, I would speak to the manager and raise concerns about her treatment, also her family should be informed of any injuries that are due to staff involvement so would ask to see the accident report/injuries record for the leg mark

Under arm lifts should not be done. All residents who need assistance should have a risk assessment done and appropriate hoist belt/lifting belt.

Sorry to hear about your Nan
Under arm lifts should not be done and she should be wiped.
I know you've said you'll get other family to speak to people in charge but please make sure you do. It's difficult when it's an emotional time but if nobody complains (and follows the complaint up) nothing changes.

Also you have more than every right to speak to someone in charge about it yourself, your still a relative and you've witnessed it first hand.

Both things are relatively minor compared to the horror stories (not saying that makes them ok!), but they're symptomatic of an attitude of negligence and not treating residents as people with individual needs and feelings. Everyone on here who knows about such things has said under arm lifts are bad. It's bad not to wipe her after a wee. And it's bad that she's got an injury from being moved, even allowing for elderly people bruising/marking more easily.

You should speak to the manager, ask for their policies on lifting and personal hygiene for residents, and why they're not being followed.

Whenever someone posts about this sort of thing, I thing your relative is lucky in that they have you and your family to advocate for them. There will be people in there that have no one. So you're not just complaining for your own relative, hopefully it will benefit those who don't have someone to complain for them as well

My MIL has been in a nursing home for four years and amongst some lovely, kind carers, there have been some shockers. Much of this is done to compensate for lack of staff and time so staff on duty cut corners and get slack.

My advice is to appoint just one member of the family to liaise with the manager/ matron to discuss any concerns and try to prioritise. If you list 101 complaints they will ignore them all.

Our experience has been pretty dismal. We complain, the manager then asks MIL if she wants to complain and of course she says no,months worry. Then they say she has capacity to decide and there is no complaint....She's too scared to complain. Last time we said anything we were told we were affecting staff morale and should consider moving her. It's her home ffs. There are some lovely staff in all these places but it's patchy.

Sorry, may not have been too helpful but I do empathise.

This made me so so so sad... I don't even have words to explain. Please do complain, OP, this is so sad and unacceptable!!!

Harder I agree there are worst cases, I think it was just shocking to see as it was my own nan and being very frail and needing care just wasn't like her, she has gone downhill.

They are obviously not wiping her, but like I said when she lifted the blanket I could smell her. I would hate the feeling of going to the loo and not being able to wipe myself, surely it could make her sore after a while too.

Vestal I thought the same thing, right now how she is, I think if there even was a problem at the home she wouldn't tell us. If she was her normal self she would, and she would take no shit. But as I said she's very frail and can't be bothered with fuss.

Ilovebacon I dreaded her going into a home, after everything you hear about them she is only there for 2 weeks (depending on how she is), so she will be going home after for 2 weeks then will be back in the home for good. The carers seemed nice, but after today I'm not happy with the place at all, never mind the matter of using hoists etc purely for the fact they didn't even wipe her after the loo, and looked right though me when I questioned them about it.

Thank you all for advice xx

If they didn't wipe her when you were there, when will they? at least it's short term

If that's the care she gets when a relative is standing next to her then what will she get when you are not?

Seriously, you need to flag this up urgently.

The lifting under her arms is totally unacceptable and is now classed as abuse, although sadly it is still very common to see it being done. The wiping wouldn't concern me too much as I suspect your nan has a pad on. They will (should) give her a freshen up morning and evening and perhaps were going to do this in 10 mins anyway? It's sometimes hard to get people to stand up well enough for a proper wipe, so they leave it until they can get them washed properly in bed if that makes sense? I'm surprised that didn't put any barrier cream on though to prevent sores. Unfortunately elderly skin is very delicate and can bleed / bruise from a very minor knock. However obviously blood running down the leg is not acceptable and a dressing should be on it. I would definitely mention your concerns to the person in charge.

Report.

If the home is part of a large chain (Bupa, Hc one etc) you can ring the head office directly. You can be sure the complaint will be dealt with properly then.

Under arm lifts must never be done.

The care sounds terrible. None of the Home Managers I have worked with would want this type of care in their home.

Raise a safeguarding issue straight away. Your concerns are genuine and you shouldn't feel bad about bringing them to the right professional attention.

I hope it all gets resolved and she gets better care.

I have worked in elderly care where sadly the underarm lift was used regularly, it's not supposed to be but if I can just explain that it's not always staff being lazy as to why they don't/can't use hoists. As a moving and handling trainer you will know that residents who need hoisting would need to have their own appropriately sized sling...not one resident where I worked had their own sling.In fact there was only one sling in the home where I worked with 40 residents which is clearly not appropriate ( one size does not fit all) some of the residents with Dementia would have been terrified of being hoisted. The rooms were quite small especially the bathrooms/toilet and you would not have safely got a mobile hoist in there.If the 2 commodes were in use with other residents. The hoist in our home I saw used only once or twice in the two years I worked there and it was just pure luck that it had been charged! Because of the growing needs of the residents and more residents requiring nursing care the staff are really overstretched and sadly underpaid with staff members expecting to wash/ shower/bath a couple of the residents and get others washed and dressed before 8.30-09.00 for breakfast. I was shocked to see that 1 member of staff is expected to support approx 6 residents with their morning routines everyday, so excuse me if I take unbridgeable to the comment about staff laziness remember that not all of those 6 residents in the morning has capacity and trying to gently coax and/or motivate a resident who doesn't want to wash or have their personal care done only adds to the stress when you have so many residents to take care of amongst so few staff.
Sadly the home I worked in is typical of many homes and the BUPA home my mum was in was sadly worse because of such low pay. I must say that the staff that I worked with were dedicated,kind and compassionate under very difficult circumstances and I can honestly say aside from the odd 1 or2 were definitely not lazy.