Mil

[mallamloll]

Me and dp haven't spoken to mil in about 1.5 years as we went nc.

She has just messaged dp saying that she's going to see a solicitor about contact with dc. Do she have any rights to this at all.

Thanks everyone I feel a bit better about it. Just shook me a little as I love my dc so much I don't want in being involved in a situation like this.
The family are toxic

She'll get no where. My mother, who didn't look after me much past one year of age, tried to use my mil to get to my children. I saw a solicitor. She was given very strong words of advice and what the consequences would be if she tried contact again. Silly bitch had a friend pretend to be her lawyer.

It's all about what's best for the children. Not what the grandparent wants to play mummy's and babies about.

Thanks goingtobeawesome. I know what mil is like she's probably bored at the minute and has decided oh I'll try and get a grandchild for a bit of entertainment

Why after all this time?

Probably because she's been waiting for your DH to give in first, and he hasn't, or she's been thinking of ways to get back at you and read a story on the internet or in the paper that gave her the idea to try this.

Get together all the evidence you can of the fraud. Document other instances of unpleasant and narcissistic behavior. From the little I know grandparents only get 'rights' if they have been regular care givers to the child, such as looking after the child several days a week while the parent was at work, but based on what MissHavisham posted I am out of date. For your own peace of mind get together the information now, which will also help clarify in your own minds why you have taken this step. It doesn't matter that you didn't pursue the fraud with the police, provided you have the evidence. What is the statute of limitations on the fraud? You may be able to still file charges against her to make her back off.

I doubt a judge would require you to let your child spend time with an unethical, emotionally and financially abusive adult, however they are related. If for some reason she does get access, fight to get it to be supervised and make her pay for the supervision. That is what happens here (not in the UK) with unfit parents who are given access, a social worker supervises the interactions with the child, and the person demanding access has to pay for it.

Catminion has a point. She might want your child's personal details to open bank accounts and credit cards in their name. Do you have a way of checking your child's financial history to ensure she hasn't done so?

Mil looked after my dc at the end of 2015 for a period of about 4 months, two days per week but I always tried to get out of work early most days which I can prove as I wasn't happy about the situation but saved us money.

That was a long time ago and the childcare situation was what ended up being the final straw as she wasn't listening to us in regards to our child's welfare and would lie about where my child had been that day and other silly things.

Dc is 2.5 years old

Easier said then done but try not to worry.

My ex-MIL is telling every man and his dog she is going to apply for contact with DD2.

We stopped contact (with SS advice) as she was taking DD2 to her dad's (ex-mils son) knowing full well he was taking drugs.

I ignore for my own sanity. Your DP shouldn't be taking it out on you though.