To ask school not to harass DCs about fundraising

[TrollMummy]

DCs school has been running several fundraising activities to raise funds for various projects that they cannot afford due to the cuts in school funding.

We have supported pretty much all of the fundraising activities and donated as much as possible. However yesterday a teacher had a go at DS as we had not make a donation towards something. AIBU to think schools should not harass kids or parents for donations or embarrass them in front of others by naming and shaming who hasn't donated.

I am totally aware of the dire situation that schools are in so this is not a moan about fundraising just how the school are going about it.

YANBU, what a shitty thing to do.

It is shitty, but if your DS is 7+ then address it directly with him and give him a stock answer to reply with.

YANBU at all. When DS2 was at primary school I used to go around classes picking up donations for PTA events, and it was awful to see some staff hassling kids about what their parents hadn't sent in.

Ugh. I hated the fundraising stuff at school. I never got sponsors for anything, and my Barnardo's box was always empty. Caused me no end of stress.

What did they actually say when they had a go?

Take it up with your MP - getting more funds for the school I mean, not them asking your daughter for your help.

The teacher asked to DS if we had made a donation in front of a group of classmates and when he said no, he was quizzed about why we had not so DS Said he didn't know. He was then told how the school couldn't afford to buy things and that it was very important that parents gave money or the school wouldn't be able to buy things which just made DS feel really bad.

I wouldn't mind but I have supported most of the fundraising activities so far this year it's just this month I have had enough. Also some of the fundraising is for specific projects and extra things that I don't feel are necessary if the schools budget is really tight.

It's

Id tell her cough up out of her own pocket cheeky cow

I am not usually one for writing/emailing in but in this instance I would!

How dare she try to shame him! I bet she wouldn't have the gall to do it to you.

I would say that on numerous occasions you have supported the school (insert examples) but on this occasion we didn't/were unable to. However, the attitude you have displayed and the way you have treated DS has made me less inclined to continue the support in the future rather than more inclined. In future every time you ask for some form of donation please be happy to know that whatever we had donated would now be going to the dog's home/local hospice/Red Cross (delete as applicable). Copy the headteacher in to!

*too!

She really shouldn't harass your DS like that. If she has an issue, she should take it up with you.

I think they certainly shouldn't be having that conversation with your son. With you, maybe, but not him and not publicly.

YANBU.

My DC's elementary school had 'Boosterthon' where professional fundraisers came in and ran a charity walk. They would go into every class at the start of the day and ask the children about how many sponsors they had got. I was livid. DH and I gave $150 to a program at the start of the year on the understanding that that was all the fundraising that was going to be done. I was seriously angry that my children were being hit up every day by professional chuggers as well. I asked the teacher to put a stop to it.

I'm not surprised to hear this is happening given the straightened finances many schools now face. However, I am saddened.

When my now-grown-up DDs were at primary school, the Headteacher changed and suddenly there was a charity appeal every half term. Chosen by the HT.

I was a SAHM and did extra classroom assistance stuff for free. I was also Secretary for the PTA. The HT was asked to come and discuss this new approach with PTA and we invited a rep from the Board of Governors to come along too.

Pleased to report that it went back to one charity appeal a year, gave us a strengthened relationship with the PTA and happy kids and parents.

Use the connections you have, gather support from other parents and flex your muscles!

Oh and Troll... YADNBU!

the phrasing used by the teacher is atrocious. They were in effect emotionally blackmailing your DS into coming home & begging you to contribute.

I would be writing to the teacher,
copying in the head and chair of governors, asking when it became school policy to do this. And whether the LEA is aware of the policy.

And of course, not contributing anything else!