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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To send our two children to different primary schools?

18 replies

flownthecoopkiwi · 15/06/2017 12:41

Got myself all confused about what the right thing to do is.

Our DD goes to school in village A, which was out of catchment from our previous house but we were lucky and there was no village school where we lived.

Bought new house in village B. It has a school and preschool. Due to age difference between DS and DD they would both be there for only two years before older one goes to secondary.

Was going to move him from his nursery to a smaller preschool setting anyway,

So... do we take him to DDs preschool at her school for a year then see if we can get him in there but no school friends in this village where we live
Or, send him directly to our village preschool and then onto the primary and live with children in different schools?

Just writing this out has helped!

OP posts:

x2boys · 15/06/2017 12:47

how would it work though having to get two children to two different schools? my boys go to different schools because my youngest has complex learning disabillities and goes to a special school the LEA provide transport though as otherwise it would be a nightmare ,how close are the schools etc?

Original poster

flownthecoopkiwi · 15/06/2017 12:50

Current one 6 minutes drive , local one 2 minutes. Both husband and I could take one each

OP posts:

TellMeItsNotTrue · 15/06/2017 12:55

There is also possibility of different school days off, and events (sports day, school play etc) clashing

x2boys · 15/06/2017 12:57

as long as you can pick them up as well,i dont see it being a problem really regarding not having school freinds my oldest son school is about a mile and ahalf awy and his frinds from school dont live near enough for him to 'play out' with but he has friends where we live so thats not really an issue.

mumtomaxwell · 15/06/2017 12:57

Lots of families do this - I even know families with twins/triplets who send them to different schools.

Different schools suit different children. Some prefer single sex schools, some have a child who gets a place in a SEN school; there are lots of other reasons too.

Do whatever suits your family!

PotteringAlong · 15/06/2017 12:58

Different schools, especially as it's only for 2 years

LaraAxelrod2 · 15/06/2017 12:58

On a side note where do you live and work that you can both do a school run every day? not jealous

x2boys · 15/06/2017 12:59

yes there are those issues as TellMe says, due to my boys having to go seperate schools sometimes their holidays differ abit even though the schools are in the same LEA and sports day has clashed before now.

SilenceOfThePrams · 15/06/2017 13:08

2 separate schools, or, if there's a space for your oldest, see how they'd feel about moving - they might also like the chance of local friends.

Original poster

flownthecoopkiwi · 15/06/2017 13:08

This is only possible due to breakfast club and after school club, I work four days. We both have reasonably flexible employers too which help

OP posts:

Original poster

flownthecoopkiwi · 15/06/2017 13:10

Silence, DD not keen on moving at all, but we have got her to join a couple of village groups to meet people. Both villages feed into same secondary

OP posts:

harderandharder2breathe · 15/06/2017 13:11

If you can manage the logistics then go for it, especially as it'll only be two years til the eldest goes to secondary

mammymammyIRL · 15/06/2017 13:42

I would leave your dd in current school and start your ds in new school, do you plan to continue living where you are now?

Original poster

flownthecoopkiwi · 15/06/2017 15:48

God yes, never buying another house again for a couple of decades!

OP posts:

JuicyStrawberry · 15/06/2017 16:29

Could one child go to breakfast and after school club? I know this might seem harsh on the child that has to go but it's the only solution I can think of.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 15/06/2017 16:38

As long as its doable I'd do what you think is best. We did double school runs for six months and it was a nightmare (but I don't drive though!). Even with driving you've got to account for things like sports days (both DCs were held on the same day and afternoon last year - it meant sending one family member to watch DS in his whilst I watched DD in hers!). Christmas assemblies, what id one DCs teacher wants to speak to you after school will it make you late to pick the other one up? Or will both of you be able to pick both DCs up from the same school too.

Re the not having any school friends, children are surprisingly adaptable. My DS started with no friends and now has five. (He's SENs).DD started with none too and now has 8.

TheNoodlesIncident · 15/06/2017 16:56

So is your dd in Year 4? Personally I'd leave her where she is and send ds to your new village school B. I'd rather have the potential awkwardness about sports day (which a lot of parents can't attend anyway although it's nice if you can) clashes and possibly differing INSET days than having to uproot one child or take the other out of his village unnecessarily when he could be at school in a couple of minutes.

Plus neither school is particularly far away and your dd will be making friends with local children in her groups/activities, which will help a lot.

You said writing it out had helped, do you feel less undecided now...?

Allthebestnamesareused · 15/06/2017 18:40

2 schools - some people don't even get to chose and get this. If you can do it logistics wise and it seems you can then do it. After all your younger child will have 7 years of school to go. Also as your older child goes to secondary it is possible they may do the after school run for you. So it will be easier for them to collect from the closer school.

Flip