To feel fed up and depressed at how much weight I've gained after having my kids... even though I don't actually eat anymore than I did before?!

[Differentnamefornow]

This is just a vain ranty post, really. Just wondered if anyone else our there feels the same and fancies a rant, too.

I have two kids and love them loads. But three years of sleep deprivation, breastfeeding and pregnancies has left my body just... mangled... EMCS scar, pouch over the top. A stone heavier, much wrinklier, hair greyer and boobs... well giant and saggy.

I feel so ugly.

My friend took some photos of me in the park with my kids today and I wanted to like them, but felt a little shocked at what I look like. I felt like going home and crying, which was stupid as we were having a lovely day.

I'm pretty short so I don't carry weight well.

And I don't actually eat any more than pre-kids, i think I just hang onto fat while breastfeeding maybe. But after basically three years of it with a small break in the middle (14 months with one, break, then preg, still going after almost a year with the next), I just wonder if this is my new body now. My metabolism has slowed down or something.

Sigh. Just a rant. An unreasonable rant, I know, but need to just get it out there. I have a lot to be thankful for (remembering that today especially) but miss my old easy body.

Also- I never have anything decent to wear!

Anyone else?! Or is it just me?!

You're being pretty hard on yourself. Can you get your hair done and buy some new, more flattering clothes? Ask someone you trust for ideas and shapes that will work on you now.

Then when you are finished feèding and have a bit of energy you can reassess any weight loss or toning you can do. My body held weight while feeding. Then I held on by eating too much for some years.
Li list it eventually and now dress better and am more groomed than for a long, long time but that's because I have more time.

Post on the style and beauty threads for support.

Yes I know exactly how you feel! I cried a couple of weeks ago as it was so hot and nothing fitted me or just looked horrendous. All I wanted to do was wear a baggy jumper and stay indoors.

My little one starts nursery soon I'm really hoping I can start going to the gym as I want to feel better about myself and get fitter so when he's older I can run around the park with him.

It doesn't help when the majority of my friends haven't had a baby and are slim but try and tell me not to worry and they feel the same!

Can you buy some new clothes that will suit your changes figure? I just went to primark or boohoo.com so didn't spend much as I really want to be able to get back into my old clothes. I'm not sure how old your children are but can you do any buggy fit classes or anything if they are at nursery?

I'm sorry I don't have anything useful to add but please know you are not alone.

I put on weight when bf and I think it can take some women longer for their bodies to settle down.

It sounds like your kids are still small, give yourself a break and your body a chance to get over the pregnancies and feeding and then see what you can do to improve figure wise if you want too. My sections have wrecked my belly but I've learnt to cover it and not care so much.

Get to hairdressers or buy a home dye if sorting the greys will make you feel better and get a couple of mix and match outfits you actually like rather than things that 'will do'.

You're allowed to have a vain rant, you feel how you feel!

Thank you matilda and belle!

Matilda- good to know you've lost your bf weight now. Was it easy?

Belle- ugh it's so hard when your body changes! Doing some classes when your little one starts nursery sounds great. I'm totally yearning to! My oldest is 3, my youngest is just a baby. But my 3 year old is at nursery and my baby will be looked after a day a week when I've finished breastfeeding... probably in the autumn. I really want to start some yoga then and stretch out! Though prob need cardio more!

I feel exactly the same...2 kids, youngest just gone one and since I stopped breastfeeding in Feb I put on a stone. I have tried really hard to lose it ... diet, gym etc and it's just not shifting! I think it's sleep deprivation- apparently when you don't sleep enough you are hungrier but also crave all the wrong foods and the hormone cortisol is released which makes you much more prone to storing fat around your middle. I'm 41 and have always been told I look young for my age - but I feel like it's caught up on me and then some!!

Thank you trunkisareshite (great name by the way! 😂)

I am now inspired to book the hairdresser! vanish those greys! I need to explore what clothes suit me now that I'm a bit bigger. I just wear any old baggy rag I can find

westworld - oh wow that's interesting about cortisol... I haven't slept a single "through the night" in 3 years and my baby's birth was pretty stressful. Wonder if that's part of it?

I feel exactly the same. I always pile on weight when I breastfeed. My fourth baby is six months and I have had four sections. Am heavier than I've ever been. Also struggling to find what to wear, especially as have to pop a Boob out at a minutes notice. However have just put my self on a diet and trying couch to 5k! Is so frustrating because everyone seems to lose weight while feeding but I pile it on! (probably because I eat anything that isn't nailed down!)

drmum - totally hard to find anything to wear in the summertime when breastfeeding! Couch to 5k - amazing, well done!!

I feel your pain OP. Still feeding very soon to be 1 year old Ds and I feel massive and pretty unattractive most of the time. I've held onto the weight I put on whilst pregnant and I wasn't exactly Kate Moss to start with. I definitely think sleep deprivation is a massive factor. DS is a crap sleeper and so I do crave sugary foods just to give me a boost of energy.

I'm hoping to dial down the breastfeeding in the next month or so although DS doesn't seem to have read the memo and shows no signs of stopping!

I did hit primark recently and bought some new bits, mainly skinny jeans with loose tops to disguise the horror show that is my tummy!

I try to remind myself that my body has done an amazing thing and not be too hard on myself but it is hard. I'd definitely hit the hairdressers and Primark it's not a magic cute but it helps!

Completely relate to all of this! Definitely a bit overweight but mainly just look and feel old, grey & ugly - and I only have one child! I've recently stopped breastfeeding. But not eating any less yet! Anyway none of that helps you but

I gained weight whilst bfing too. It's thoroughly depressing.

I feel exactly the same. I've not put on much weight, I've always been heavier than I should be, but after having dc2, my body has totally changed shape. I've got the horrible overhang from two sections and everything has just dropped. I'm doing couch to 5k just now and trying to eat well, and I now regularly get my hair cut and coloured which makes me feel a bit more human. I'm also trying to not get hung up about it, I realised recently that I have hardly any photos of me and the kids because I never like the way I look in them, and that's rubbish.

I weigh a stone and a half less than before I was pregnant - turned out that I had an underactive thyroid and PCOS. I'd been struggling to lose weight whilst ttc, got diagnosed, lost a stone in two months of levothyrixine, then promptly got knocked up.

My stomach is a horror show 10 months post-birth though - even when I was bigger it was less flabby, and certainly not crepey.

If you are struggling to lose weight and you think you should be, check out the symptoms of hypothyroidism and see if you have any - it's not uncommon for it to develop post-pregnancy.