To e really uncomfortable about this food bank usage?

[EssieTregowan]

It's not strictly a food bank, it's a local church community project, they get donated out of date food and run a free cafe, and every few weeks they run a free drop in where you can basically pick up what you like.

It is advertised as for everybody, tbf, but their website is very clear that its aim is to tackle food poverty.

My sister has been three times and keeps sharing the link and gushing about all the free food she's been getting.

I am really, really uncomfortable with this. They have three holidays a year, drive a new car, both have good jobs. They are not in any way in poverty. She is very tight and loves a bargain (nothing wrong with that) and is chuffed to bits to be getting a crate of free food every few weeks.

It makes me feel a bit sick though. I can't say anything in real life as I'll look like a bitch and probably be accused of being jealous

Aibu? This just strikes me as all kinds of wrong but I'm prepared to be told otherwise.

[AcrossthePond55]

AGnu 👍🏻 That's perfect! OP, do what AGnu said.

[whatsthecomingoverthehill]

Agreeing with chumpchange. The groups that I know of are tackling food waste, not poverty (though there is inevitably a cross over). They all operate on a 'pay as you feel' basis. I guess it's similar to the reduced sections at the supermarket - some people see it as a way to get a bargain, others would view it as mean to take something if it would deprive someone who was struggling of the bargain.

Food banks are a completely different thing. They rely on people buying the food for them, not supermarkets getting rid of their out of date stuff.

[PersianCatLady]

they get donated out of date food and run a free cafe
I don't believe that it is actually out of date food as many projects that I know of have to turn away out of date food due to H & S law.

Short dated is OK though.

[Peanutbuttercheese]

Your sister is highly unusual taking advantage like this. I have been involved with food banks at a local and regional level both Trussell trust and independent ones. Most food banks need a referral though some do give out food no questions or referral needed.

To be honest it's her conscience isn't it, well she has one that I am glad I don't own.

Many people that are referred are having issues with benefits, between jobs, illness, low wages, domestic violence, mental health issues.

There is no way I would be able to not say something. Sometimes food banks run out of specific things and she is literally depriving people far less fortunate than her.

[Lynnm63]

I'd never heard of FareShare but I've just looked. I'm pretty sure the mum who talks about donating the money her 11 year old had raised isn't intended to give free food to your sister who has a good job, new car and three foreign holidays a year. That's what I'd tell her.

[Peanutbuttercheese]

Ah fareshare have a slightly different agenda, I stand by my food bank comments though. That's what you get for writing but not posting for almost an hour.

[NotCitrus]

She should be able to make a generous donation to support the charity and still get a bargain if she's collecting food she will use.

Food banks near me (Trussell Trust, I think) won't take food that's out of date (as in Best Before date, so still perfectly safe), so anyone taking it and stopping it becoming landfill is fine by me.

[PersianCatLady]

All the food at FareShare is in date.

Basically your sister is taking food away from people who could really use it.

[limitedperiodonly]

I don't believe that it is actually out of date food as many projects that I know of have to turn away out of date food due to H & S law.

I believe The Real Junk Food Project serve meals cooked from out of date food. So do I and no one has threatened to prosecute me. That's because we don't sell it. But apparently the project has been threatened with prosecution under HSE laws.

I'm not sure what the motive is: whether to protect public safety or to remove them from their premises so that other cafes with paying customers can move in.

[whatsthecomingoverthehill]

Real Junk Food Project - definitely about food waste. They do take out of date food - that's a big part of what they're trying to do - educating people about how to see if food is OK, not just blindly following labels.

[EssieTregowan]

I've just had a good look at their website and FB page. It's definitely meant to be for those in need, but it's worded in a way to reduce stigma.

I'm going to have to say something.

[SaucyJack]

"She's just seen a bargain, well more than a bargain as she hasn't paid anything,"

There's no harm in reminding her not to take the piss or barge to the front of the queue, but please remember that FareShare will be charging her church for the amount of food of the church's choice, so if she's paying money into the church's coffers at fundraisers then it's unlikely she's exploiting anyone by participating in the food project.

[EssieTregowan]

She's not a member of the church. So no fundraisers or anything.

And I know she hasn't donated.

[SaucyJack]

Cross post.

She may well not be acting in the spirit the specific church intended then, but she isn't doing anything wrong as far as the anti-food wastage agenda of FareShare is concerned

[EssieTregowan]

It's not the Real Junk Food project. It's a church project and it is definitely meant to feed the homeless, elderly and in need.

[whatsthecomingoverthehill]

The church should be taking people by referral then, like foodbanks do. I didn't realise fareshare did foodbank type services, I though it was more about donating food to charities to use themselves, not for the charities to then redistribute.

[EssieTregowan]

This is on their home page. I'm going to forward it to her.

[ImperialBlether]

I've had a look at FareShare for my area now and it says:

"Their reach includes breakfast clubs, women’s refuges, homeless hostels and luncheon clubs for older people."

It specifically states it's for vulnerable people.

[limitedperiodonly]

I know. You said it was FareShare. They have a similar ethos to Real Junk. It's not simply about not being able to afford food. They talk about 'vulnerable people.' That could be anyone.

Your sister doesn't sound like a vulnerable person. She sounds like a greedy freeloader. But they abound. I can't really get my knickers in a knot about it. If she is abusing the church's Christian charity, I'm sure the people who work there will deal with it. I live close to a cathedral which had a problem with aggressive street drinkers harassing worshippers, wedding parties etc. Basically: 'give me money or I will get my arse out in the photos or puke on the bride.'

The priests were pretty robust in dealing with them. People of faith may be kind but that doesn't mean they are fools.

[Mulch]

I just can't think how she Can justify her actions

[Helenluvsrob]

Your sister is taking advantage big time. However have seen people who haven't eaten for several days via work because they didn't have " the right form" on " the right day" and the food bank only opens 2-3x a week. I'd rather this system than the food bank one that lets vulnerable people go hungry.

[AmenacingWhistle]

I've worked closely with a food bank and totally get why you are unhappy with your sisters use of the facility the Church is providing.
May I suggest you discuss the terms of use with the Church. They will hopefully revise the same.
I don't think anyone should 'jump through hoops' to qualify. But I do believe the help offered should only be available to those most in need. Especially in our current climate.

[limitedperiodonly]

It's definitely meant to be for those in need, but it's worded in a way to reduce stigma

That's just how you've chosen to see it because you want us to agree with you that your sister is a horrible person.

It's for everyone. I could have gone to my nearest charity lunch club today no questions asked. I'm not poor but I might have been feeling lonely or without sounding too Lady Bountiful about it, I might want to chat to someone who's feeling lonely or vulnerable because that's what makes me happy.

The point of these places is that they are not just for the poor and needy. They are for everyone in the community and they only work if everyone uses them.

Obviously those of us who can pay, should. That is the only issue here.

The stigma is in your head because you have a bee in your bonnet about your sister.

[lanouvelleheloise]

- just at her behaviour!

It reminds me of this:

[Northgate]

Is she giving a donation for the food she receives? Or turning up at the end of the day / session and taking food that would otherwise be binned?

If she's not doing either of those then her behaviour sounds kind of immoral - that's food that could be given to someone really struggling to feed their family.