To expect MIL to just ask how I am?

[FlossALump]

Those who know of my MIL will probably think yes, it is unreasonable of me! I'm 15 weeks pg tomorrow, told FIL at around 9 weeks. Have seen her about 4 times since and she hasn't made even the slightest inquiry. I don't want to sit there and run through exactly how pg is for me, (i'm doing plenty of that on here just an acknowledgment that I am carrying her grandchild!!

Did your FIL actually get round to telling your MIL?
I know my dad is hopeless at passing on messages & news. Though that is a pretty important bit of news to forget about.
Congratulations by the way

Yes he did, same night. He asks me every time. Just apparently he dosen't dare do it in front of her (this is our second child btw and very much planned)

She must be a little strange.

What on earth is up with her then.
I know I didn't get pampered the second time (I was allowed to pick up dining room chairs etc) but I did always get asked how I was doing.
.... How are you feeling ?

If she's anything like my mil then it's a jealousy thing. MIL never asked me how I was with either of my pgs and indeed was quite vile when we told her I was pg with ds2 ("so soon? how careless of you. are you going to get rid?") Anyway, we don't really have anything to do with her now. [relief emoticon]

I spoke to my MIL on my due date last time and all she said was "Hello, can I speak to Kivvin" and "yeah, foine" when I asked her how she was.

Nope, not unreasonable but not unusual either!

congratulations

I think your mil is really odd, has she mentioned it to your dp/dh at all? Perhaps she is jealous because you are fertile (sorry couldnt think of another word) and she isnt

Is she maybe sulking because she thinks you ought to have told her yourselves, rather than FIL telling her? Not that I think that's a good reason, just that it might be enough in her mind for her to be offended.

If she's anything like my MIL her sore leg, pile of washing and ironing, weight problem etc are far more important and worthy of conversation than how you are.

My MIL doesn't always ask after me either (despite the fact I'm almost 38 weeks pg with her first grandchild). DH tells me she's offered to buy me big garden tubs for my b'day (and bring them up in a couple of months time)...BTW I should point out I don't know how to garden, we've already got some tubs and I'll have a newborn baby to look after...

My MIL did ask how I was ealrier in the pregnancy then followed it up with "Have your breasts started to swell yet?"

This was in front of my nephew & neice. Didn't really know what to say!!!

I'm fine!

She is just basically a nutbag. I know she is but am unable to get used to it! I don't think she particularly likes me, although she has no real reason not to...

I love MIL threads !
Mines here now - waiting for her Tea, she's just been taken to her daily visit to her husbands grave (its freezing) , so she could light the candles. Ive just showed her my new mobile phone - and got "oh is it new?" and then I showed her my new mug "worlds best mum" (from mothers day) "ohhhh is it new?" (yes, it was mothers day I said!!)
that will be the total conversation we get all night, so im going to sit and sort out my new mobile phone.
I HATE tuesday evenings............... (thank god for MN! )

oh and im nearly 26 weeks and have been asked once how I am........

Do you think she is offended that you didn't tell her directly? It may be that she thinks she isn't supposed to know and is waiting for you to tell her....

Sounds a bit far fetched though even as i type it!

Floss.....................

She is a nut job.

IJ she is just plain mad, TBH.

SHe refused to mind DS1 for Floss and her DP, the weekend they were moving house. Well actually they agreed to come up from the West Country to help out and then cancelled at very short notice. Does my memory serve me correctly Floss ?

She sounds a bit like my MIL (she doesn't have 8 kids does she Floss???!)

Mine has 8 kids, she is always surprised if I answer the phone when she rings. She either hopes I have left or thinks i have a butler!

Some people are just plain mean, don't waste your energy trying to work her out, just look after yourself. I was overly sensitive in my pregnancies, you just don't need any crap from anyone. I think it's called passive aggressive by not mentioning it?

Floss,
i can so empathise with you, my MIL is a total nutjob too! dd is 1 yr now and i haven't seen MIL since she was about 4 mths cos she was just acting so strangely. everyone i've talked to about it has put it down to jealousy on her part.
again, she has never liked me, for no real reason esp since she found out i was pregnant. some people are just plain weird!
Congratulations to you tho' just concentrate on looking after yourself and spending time in the company of those who do ask how you are. its so important when youre pregnant to feel supported. my MIL told dp to break up with me when she found out i was pregnant and needless to say i'm not keen on letting dd near her even tho she's apparently changed her tune over the past year adn a half.

mine never ever rings the house phone, alw ays dh's mobile or work number.Im 30 weeks pg and her only direct comment to me thus far on it has been,'i simply do not know how you are going to cope with two babies under two'.Odd since she has 6 kids between which the largest gap was 2 years..obviosuly she considers me to be a total numpty..
She then claims she can never get hold of me on the phone.Which is probably because she doesnt try!
That said its no loss to me really, except dh would like us to get on better, and to be fair I never ring her either so hey ho..

That does ring a bell LGJ - my memory is appalling. The things which stick out in my mind is ruining DP and my only night away from home together last year, a night in a hotel following a wedding. Closest thing we got to a holiday last year and totally monopolised by her, even though she wasn't looking after DS. She has never once agreed to, although she looks after Ds's cousin on a weekly basis. And the time when there wasn't enough room in her 5 bedroomed house for DP DS and I to stay a few weeks before christmas when we were house hunting. We had to stay in a hotel. Right rant over - Off to work!