To wish a plague of biblical proprtions upon the person sat next to me right now

[newnameoldme]

Ive had to learn to be tolerant as i sit watching my dd at her classes.. a lot of parents..a lot of small babies and toddlers squashed into an observation area with nothing to do but tantrum and talk Shite

This woman is making me murderous.. she's sat so close I'm tilting my phone screen to write.. she's been slurping rattling crunching slurping a freeze pop thing for 10 mins.. whilst noisily flicking through a magazine and making phonecall.
Horrible whiney voice

I'm wishing a plague of boils erupts on her bum

Phyllis !!! Where you been at girl? I may have been binge watching orange is the new black seriously though, haven't seen you around much how are you and how are your Friday fajita nights?? Misses point of thread sorry

Hi BigApple11! I've been busy with work, social life & preperatons for the baby! I haven't had a specific Fajita Friday since, but I have cooked some for myself many times since!

I've been watching OITNB too. I started Friday on Season 5 & I've just finished. Couldn't imagine being pregnant in jail - what a nightmare that would be!

Lift whichever of your buttocks is closest to her.
Make a satisfying "ahhh" noise
And then say "Better out than in"

If that fails then pick your nose and admire your harvest before looking at her for somewhere to wipe your finger.

Loving this thread!

Santanico Please explain how you know what it sounds like when you give an ice lolly a blow-job.

Eventually the guy next to him leaned in really close and told him 'that sounds delicious, can I get in on it

😂 That's hilarious. What did everyone else do, when the guy left? I'd be looking for that Guy, every time I went to work and make sure I was sitting beside him. He'd ensure you had a lovely quiet journey.

I had this same thing yesterday at sports day. School puts out a row of tiny chairs for parents to sit on, which is alongside the track. One seat next to me. Lady comes along with massive buggy and toddler, sits on chair, but pushes buggy in front of her, so sticking out in front of the line. No one to the right if me including me, could see past it, so they couldn't see their kids in the race untill they were on top of them. Two hours later, and a mass of bananas, crisp feeding, screaming, trying to get toddler to sleep etc, I could have killed her.