To buy my DS a dress?

[Isthereanyusernamesleft]

I've one DS, he is my first & last (traumatic birth).

He's only 10 weeks so is still quite neutral I.E you can't necessarily tell he's a boy yet!

I think dresses are lovely & as I don't follow this gender society crap of girls wear dresses & pink & boys wear blue & trousers.....I don't see the issue in putting my DS in a dress.

However, everyone else thinks it's wrong!

Is it??

[NotMyPenguin]

It should be noted that, in the interests of practicality, I dressed my baby pretty much solely in sleepsuits for her first year. Much easier than dresses! (Or leggings and tops).

She seems not to hate me (or really care).

[NotYoda]

You wouldn't be asking this if you were Spanish

[phoenixtherabbit]

It's not about doing as anyone says.

Essentially yes you can dress your son however you please. It's your reasons why that are troubling me.

[rolopolovolo]

I feel sorry for your son. All of your weird gender issues are going to fuck him up. Imagine your mother being so desperate for a girl that she's going to make you one.

[Isthereanyusernamesleft]

I want to buy my DS one sodding dress & apparently I'm making a point?

If I was trying to make a point, I'd put him in dresses everyday.

[Morphene]

I'm worried the op may not have picked up the theme of the responses. I will therefore paraphrase them for her.

CONFORM CONFORM CONFORM

[ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets]

You've asked a question.

You've got an answer.

You're going to do it anyway.

What exactly do you want?

[DailyMailReadersAreThick]

Imagine your mother being so desperate for a girl that she's going to make you one.

What a ridiculous thing to see. You clearly have issues here.

[Morphene]

dressing 'neutrally' would involve at least one dress a week I think. Many girls I see are about 50/50 dresses or not, and boys are trained to be scared shitless of them. so around 1/4 outfits would be neutral.

[Offherhead]

Morphene your experience is anecdotal. I have a contrary anecdote. Having been dressed completely in overalls or dungarees by my parents until age 9, I have a very varied wardrobe that includes dungarees and overalls.

[AfunaMbatata]

Why ask if you are so for it? What is the point of this thread?

[nutbrownhare15]

It's a really interesting thread. I have a daughter and like putting her in the occasional pretty dress but most of the time its tops and trousers for her. And I hate the ubiquity of pink so will often buy her 'neutral' clothes which are of course designated boys clothes because girls can only wear purple, pink or pastels with butterflies. Even trousers need frills or bows to be feminine ffs. I get why people are up in arms about a boy in a dress. But I think if you feel this way it's worth thinking a bit more critically about why society pigeon holes girls into such narrow definitions of femininity, so narrow in fact that the very idea of a boy in said clothing invokes horror.

[phoenixtherabbit]

Why does dressing neutrally for a baby need to include anything but white baby grows? Or brightly coloured. Of half blue half fucking pink.

This isn't about op dressing her baby neutrally though, is it?

I'm sorry but I'm certainly not 'training' my son to be shit scared of any clothing!

[Morphene]

Imagine a mother so desperate for her son to be able to shrug off inhibiting gender stereotypes that she will gasp allow him to wear a dress.

back in the real world, my DNeph (6yo) still goes to dress up days in a dress when he fancies it. He has failed to be destroyed by the tidal wave of bullying people on here will tell you is inevitable in these circumstances. Amazingly he can wear a dress while still very much identifying as a boy as well.

[Offherhead]

Because dresses are impractical and intended to make penetrating a vagina easier.

[GwenStaceyRocks]

Morphene lots of people don't share your experience. Personal experience does not translate into an universal truth.

OP lots of babies wear gowns so I don't think there's an issue with a baby being in a dress (although as PPs have pointed out dresses and gowns aren't the most practical choice).

Your unease and angst over a simple clothing choice seems disproportionate. It denotes your issue and has nothing to do with your DS. From your posts, I'm concerned that you are disappointed that you have a son and not a DD. But lots of nuance is lost online so I think you should talk to people in RL about it.

[phoenixtherabbit]

back in the real world, my DNeph (6yo) still goes to dress up days in a dress when he fancies it.


Yes and that's HIS CHOICE

[Isthereanyusernamesleft]

Apologies all!

I will be checking myself into a psychiatric hospital as soon as daylight appears, to have electrotherapy & will ensure I do not leave until I am rid of these horrendous thoughts of putting my DS in a dress.....where is SS when you need them!

[NotMyPenguin]

@Morphene

@ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets WAIT WAIT WAIT did you totally not see all the people disagreeing with that 'answer' you think was given?

[Morphene]

pheonix would it be more revulsion of all things 'girlie' you are aiming for then?

[NotYoda]

Morphenes

Lots of boys do that, and I agree it's great

Was your nephew dressed in dresses as a baby?

[Beadoren]

Surely it's your choice whether they want to conform though? And also I don't really understand how that's discrimination. Gender norms vary cross culturally. I was making the point that it's not the dress itself that is female, as males in other cultures traditionally wear dresses.

Op I have to say I'm finding you incredibly defensive and aggressive. Is this a genuine aibu? Because the fact that you are being so dismissive to anybody who has said yabu alone, leads me to believe you are trying to make a point/provoke a reaction with this thread.

[AfunaMbatata]

Wow, someone's been sniffing the pritt-stick it seems

[phoenixtherabbit]

morphene

I don't think you're reading my posts properly.

I don't care if my son wear a a floral pink dress every day for the rest of his life if that's what he wants. He will be allowed to wear whatever the fuck he wants when he can tell me what he wants to wear. There will be no 'thats for girls' in my house.

But that's because I want him to be comfortable and dress how he wants, not because I want to make a point about how clothes should be gender neutral.

I dress him as a boy because he is one and if/when he tells me he wants to dress differently then he can/will.

[sweetbitter]

Being completely objective and rational it seems fine.

But deep down I must admit I'd find it a bit odd.

I guess if it was a kind of plain / practical / primary coloured dress I probably wouldn't judge as much as a frothy frilly pink thing with lace and bows.