To buy my DS a dress?

[Isthereanyusernamesleft]

I've one DS, he is my first & last (traumatic birth).

He's only 10 weeks so is still quite neutral I.E you can't necessarily tell he's a boy yet!

I think dresses are lovely & as I don't follow this gender society crap of girls wear dresses & pink & boys wear blue & trousers.....I don't see the issue in putting my DS in a dress.

However, everyone else thinks it's wrong!

Is it??

Defensive/aggressive

Okay

its also his mothers choice, because she bought it for him and braved the imaginary terrors of letting him wear it.

We all choose what our kids will wear by approving or disapproving of their choices, and definitely by choosing what they wear up until the moment they begin to join in the process. Kids take huge cues from their parents around approval. The idea of a 6yo making a clothing decision for themselves is nonsensical....unless they don't have access to TV, advertising, or peer pressure and yet weirdly have their own cash supply.

I personally think a lot of the replies are aggressive.

by the way it's arethereanyusernamesleft

YABU. You're making a decision that he has no say over. Quite an important one actually.

Would you say the same to a mother putting her baby girl into a dress?

Babies can't utter an opinion either way. How many baby girls are put in frilly dresses every day because their parents think its cute?
They don't get a say.

I tend to be against putting any child at all in a dress, but I suppose as long as he's a baby, it won't do any harm.

pheonix you could try dressing him as a child instead?

You don't have to work so hard to squish him in that pigeon hole if you don't want to....

agree with everything penguin said. We relentlessly socialise very small children into damaging gender roles and this thread is an example of the kind of policing women who don't actively contribute to this process can expect

The people posting on this thread about how shocking it is for a boy to wear a dress really need to have a serious think about what they are saying about gender norms.

It's great for girls to be more like boys (note to self: do remember that masculinity is god-like and amazing; a condition to be aspired to) but it's child abuse for boys to be like girls (note to self: do remember that dresses enfeeble the mind, right? And DON'T LET THAT BOY PICK UP A DOLL FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HE MIGHT HAVE AN EMOTION LATER IN LIFE).

Anything you do for a child is making a decision on their behalf.....a decision you don't know whether they approve!

I think there are too many judgy people here who are personally attacking me.

FWIW I definitely think a mother putting a girl in a dress is doing more harm than a mother putting a boy in one.

This is so sad on so many levels, but his your child so do as you wish 🙄

by the way it's arethereanyusernamesleft

Obviously it's not because I chose IS.....again! Apologies for NOT conforming

morphene wtf is your problem?

If it makes you feel any better he does not have any clothes with diggers/dinasours/"boys will be boys" on then and you know? So fucking what if he did.

Im Not trying to pigeon hole anyone. You're being ridiculous.

for your last post op.

I call bullshit on this.

You're on AIBU complaining about judgy people? Come
On.

Why on earth is it more damaging to put a girl in a dress than it is a boy?

I think you may need to deal with any issues you have about not having any more children, if this is the issue.

I think putting a baby boy in a dress kind of suggests you may wish he were a girl. Even though a dress doesn't make a child a boy or girl.

I agree with your first ever responder, GlitteryFluff
"If he was 3 and asking for a dress I would.
Newborn, no, I wouldn't."

Plus my dd never wore dresses when young, they are just not suitable.

Fair do's. I admire your grammatical rebellion

You wanted an opinion and are now upset that people aren't rushing too agree with you. This is AIBU, you clearly have a clear idea of what you want to do and why, so do it. Just don't expect everyone to agree or justify your world view and then accuse people of being judgemental

gender stereotyping is my problem. It has been one all my life. It continues to suck. It doesn't look like its going anywhere anytime soon. because it is an emergent property of society as a whole, every single person who dressed a girl in a way they would consider dressing a boy, or refused to put clothes on a boy they would happily have put on a girl is a part of the problem.

I have therefore identified you as a part of the problem.

That is my problem.

You sound ridiculous, you posed a question, didn't get the responses you want and now acting like your being pressured to conform 🙄 I'm assuming you wanted to be applauded for how brace you are etc ..

Nobody is personally attacking YOU, OP. Just your ridiculous and impractical choices. I wouldn't put ANY baby in a dress until they were old enough to:

A.) Walk without tripping over every 5 minutes

and

B.) Voice their own goddamn opinions!

Put him in some bloody bright pink onezies for all I care, just not dresses. They look awful on any baby, regardless of gender .

er my last post was to pheonix...sorry

@Boomcack "This is so sad on so many levels" The main level on which it is sad is societal. Boys used to get put in dresses alllllll the time. Check out old pictures of toddlers in smocks -- girls and boys. This whole 'pink is for girls' thing is also a recent invention.

Also, we are inevitably ALL making choices for our babies because they are simply not old enough to share their opinions or make their own decisions. That is our job as parents. It is highly unlikely that any of them are so traumatised by our bad fashion sense that it scars them for life. I literally cannot see any potential for negative repercussions in terms of dressing a baby, unless it's somehow actually physically dangerous for them.

So much negativity on this thread!

My DS is nearly two now and has owned & worn 2 dresses in that time - a blue denim one and a white longsleeved cotton one - so nothing 'too girly'. All his other clothes are/were 'boy' or gender neutral.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a boy in a dress. I buy clothes that I think are cute and would suit him and are practical, e.g. leggings. The dresses were not to make any kind of point, they just looked nice and then he grew out of them. Of course when he's old enough to choose his own clothes, I would never force him into a dress, but that's a completely different situation!

OP, have fun dressing your child in the way that you like, while you can .

I want to hear more about your traumatic birth.