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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To walk out of garage after being ignored

110 replies

Papergirl1968 · 10/06/2017 14:24

I want to buy a nearly new car. Have decided on another Vauxhall Astra costing about £10,000 so popped into nearest dealer to see what they had. I had existing car from them and have always used them for servicing.
Three salesmen were all with customers so I looked around the forecourt for a while, then looked at the brand new cars in the showroom, then stood and played on my phone for a bit ( so I didn't appear to be eavesdropping conversations about finance), then had another look around the forecourt.
One of them finished with a customer at one point and I caught his eye and went to speak but he said he was tied up with something and went to a seating area that I actually hadn't noticed as it was partly concealed and called over another customer who had been waiting.
Surely the days have gone when men don't take women seriously when it comes to selling them a car?
Fair enough, there were other customers being dealt with first but AIBU to think one of the staff should have asked me to take a seat and said someone would be with me as soon as they were free? And AIBU to take my business elsewhere or am I being precious?

OP posts:

BiscayTrafalgarFitzroy · 10/06/2017 14:53

No OP - I am perfectly capable of buying a car on my own without the help of a big strong man

Want2beme · 10/06/2017 14:54

One of them should have acknowledged you, then asked you to have a seat til someone was available to help you. You don't mind waiting a little while, looking like you're occupying yourself whilst you're waiting, but you can only do that for so long before you start to feel conspicuous.

Give them another chance. Maybe they were just all a bit off that day. It's their loss in the end.

MikeUniformMike · 10/06/2017 14:55

Whenever I have bought a car I have gone alone and have been treated like a fuckwit. E.g., If I aked "Can I test drive the Astra 1.6l please?" they's give me a 1.1l to test drive. Or "how about this one it's a lovely colour (purple) with plenty of space for your shopping".
If I went with a bloke, they always spoke to the bloke.

Moral of the story - go but be assertive. You know what you want. Ask for it. Accept no shit.

KarmaNoMore · 10/06/2017 14:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MacarenaFerreiro · 10/06/2017 14:55

If they were all busy, they were all busy....

BackforGood · 10/06/2017 14:56

This does seem like a very weird complaint.
You go somewhere on a busy day. All staff already with customers so you have to wait, then get upset because they haven't seen you, and accuse them of sexism ?
Surely wherever you go to see someone, you either make an appt or you go an wait your turn - I genuinely can't see the issue here.

Redglitter · 10/06/2017 15:01

I walked out of one dealership after being pointed in the direction of a white car with pink and purple spots along the side. The inside was all polka dots and I was told 'Its a real ladies car

When I've bought my last few cars I've always made an appointment that way I've turned up asked for a specific salesman and never waited more than 5 or 10 mins.

viques · 10/06/2017 15:02

Well like most people I suspect I still have the paperwork for cars I bought years ago -must sort that file out- so would take me seconds to find out a name to start from . and if I was going to a new dealership I would phone and make an appointment with a named person.

I have never taken anyone male with me to buy a car, I took my daughter to look at a couple on the forecourt and then to do a few prebooked test drives, but I have always done the negotiating myself, try watching a few DomLittlewood car buying clips, there must be some online, lots of good tips.

Never tell them your max budget,mats, flaps, tank of petrol, never tell them your max budget, mats flaps,tank of petrol.........

ShakingAndShocked · 10/06/2017 15:03

This reminds me of when I bought my first 'fuck it' car

c.15 years ago know but recall it as clear as day. I'd just received my bonus and decided instead of being sensible I would fulfil my life long craving and buy myself a brand new Jag. My then DH and I stopped of at showroom after a boozy celebratory lunch where I proceeded to be.... totally fucking ignored. And even after it being made clear this was my car, for me, paid for by me, the sales guy still insisted on talking to DH and as if I wasn't there.

We left asap.

I happened to pass by there 2 weeks later in my beautiful twin exhaust car and, in what was a deeply satisfying personal Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, showing my age here moment, pulled in and had a brief chat along the lines of 'So tell me, how much commission would you have got for this?'

I'd like to think it nudged his thinking but suspect otherwise, and anyone who thinks this doesn't happen even now is mistaken IMHO.

DirtyChaiLatte · 10/06/2017 15:03

Oliversmumsarmy That's hilarious! I'll have to try that next time I'm out shopping!

IHateUncleJamie · 10/06/2017 15:04

The only car I've ever needed my DH with me was when I bought my first car which was a classic car from 1970. DH is good with cars and likes to get underneath them, look at the engine, basically go over them with a toothcomb. Particularly important when buying an old car privately.

All the other cars I've bought from dealerships I've researched, HPI checked when necessary, test driven, read through and signed the paperwork, and (luckily) have never felt talked down to or ignored just because I'm a woman.

We've had a couple of incidences of poor dealership customer service by individuals but these have been rare and my DH was with me because he was looking for a car. I put it down to crap customer service as opposed to sexism.

The dealership in question had another branch nearby who were excellent. So we went there instead.

ShakingAndShocked · 10/06/2017 15:05

*NB: I no longer drive such an impractical and fuel guzzling beast btw but I'm not gonna lie, I loved that car....

HundredMilesAnHour · 10/06/2017 15:07

So good on you for advancing the cause by daring to purchase a car on your own.

Wtf? The 1950s want you back!

I've bought all my cars as a sole female at a dealership. Never had a problem. I do my research in advance, I politely ask for what I want and I get good service. I don't need a man to hold my hand. Why on earth would I?! Nor do I see it as some of sort of advance for the women's movement ffs.

Oliversmumsarmy · 10/06/2017 15:08

DirtyChaiLatte at worst you just say (if it is an expensive car show room) that you are looking for a non leather interior. No one does them apart from Mercedes

lidoshuffle · 10/06/2017 15:25

I went into a Volkswagen dealership to buy a new Polo and was told it would be £x (can't remember). I arranged a test drive a couple of days later and was discussing cost with the same salesman who gave me a price higher than the one when I was just making the initial enquiry. He said he would "see if the manager could be persuaded to drop the price". He then buggered off pretending he was negotiating and left me sitting there for a good 5 minutes till I walked out and bought a new Toyota.

pandarific · 10/06/2017 15:27

It's more likely you were ignored as Sats are prime busy periods for car dealerships. Nothing to do with you being a woman.

MikeUniformMike · 10/06/2017 15:43

This reminds me. I am scruffy. I am so scruffy that I never even get asked if I can spare some change.
I am ignored in shops and sometimes I want to spend money. You know, like I'm in House of Lewishams to buy wedding present or something and need help. Ignored.
Take a really big bag with me and the staff are very helpful.

wisteriainbloom · 10/06/2017 15:54

I have just a brand new xc90, completely on my own. My dh wasn't even interested enough to come and pick it up with me, he is not bothered about cars.

I knocked 4K off the list price too.

wisteriainbloom · 10/06/2017 15:55

*bought

Funnyfarmer · 10/06/2017 15:57

I always take a mechanic with me. I'm very lucky that i have cpf' s who are mechanics.
I always phone in advance.
I usually find they prefer to talk to me. He's like a translator. He askes the questions but the salesman will usually turn to me to answer them.
Working in retail though there are just days when they arn't enough staff to go round. Someone is always bound to leave in a huff. We never loose sleep over it

bigbluebus · 10/06/2017 16:31

I'm afraid my experience of customer service standards when buying cars is fairly poor and I've bought 2 different makes of car in the last 9 months so have looked around a number of garages, It has nothing to do with being a woman - I had DH or DS with me on most occasions.

stayathomegardener · 10/06/2017 16:38

DH and I went to a Ranger Rover garage with the express intent of leaving with a vehicle.
Cheque book ready
After 15 minutes with no acknowledgement we left.

We were quite scruffy, I think it's car dealers in general rather than discrimination against women or minority's.

mumtomaxwell · 10/06/2017 16:40

In my experience having an apt made no difference - we phoned ahead about a car, they said they'd get it resdy for a test drive in an hour. We got there and no sign of the car... eventually they showed it to us but said we couldn't take it out after all. Salesman took us back into the showroom- he sat down behind his desk, there were no chairs for us so we stood. He talking to us about the cars they had available and then mid sentence his phone rang and he answered it!! We walked out.
That was in a branch of Evans Halshaw.

Ollivander84 · 10/06/2017 17:24

I've bought 4 cars from the same dealership. He practically cries when he sees me now last time I got tyre cover, free number plate retention, a new iPod player installed, breakdown cover, tax covered for a year, free insurance, £3500 off the price. Then I asked him for a full tank of fuel and broke him completely "you want my kidney too?". My dad takes me to buy cars now 😂😂😂

AwaywiththePixies27 · 10/06/2017 17:29

Nope. I vote with my feet. Every time. People who ignore me without good reason then dont get to pay attention to me once they realise I have cash to part with. My time is just as valuable as theirs.

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