To not be excited about my dream job?

[superheroslug]

First I know I am super lucky to have a job a like and now offer if a new exciting one with the same company.

Job is in a new specialism but one I am familiar with, the problem is it's in the US. I love the US, I have studied and lived there, but we are midway through buying in London, had just got our DC1 into nursery, have great childcare. We both have elderly parents who whilst not nearby we see regularly and we had just decided to start trying for DC3. We have a great network of family and friends

Moving to the US feels like a massive change, DH may not be able to work, if we do try for DC3 it would be midst high pressure new role and with 4 months maternity leave. I just can't get my head there but also feel I may look back and regret it...

Any wise mumsnetter tips on how we make this decision ?

Gosh tricky one! Wouldn't appeal to me in the slightest to be living in the US, but you have lived there and love it so presumably you know you can be happy there.

I don't think the friends thing is necessarily an issue, because you'll make new networks of friends; many people travel around the world with work these days so I wouldn't say that's a deal breaker. 4 month ML is a bummer when you know you'd get more here, but again, it's perfectly doable - used to be 3 months in the U.K. when i had my first

I think the two big things for me would be your dh possibly not getting a work visa... how would he feel about that? If he's ambitious and enjoys his work then that's a big problem. If on the other hand he'd happily stay home (which also could work out well if you have a short ML) then it could be fine.
Also midway through buying a property in U.K. Isn't ideal timing but again, not a deal breaker because you could go ahead with the sale and rent it out.

Whereabouts in the US and what's the package like? Living in some areas while renting out a London property could leave you with a very nice lifestyle!

No one can make the decision but you and your dh, so I would say the main thing is to talk through with him how he'd feel about possibly having a lengthy time out of work.

As a long time expatriate who is really struggling sometimes to assimilate in the UK, even though it's my home country apparently I don't have children yet, and have been struggling with finding a place to buy that I like, when I'm feeling really homesick.

My family is in the US, and I have also thought about relocating, although reapplying for a green card will be a long wait.

What would your husband do while you are at work? Can spouses volunteer somewhere, not sure what type of visa you are going on.

Skype and FaceTime and Facebook are very very useful with keeping in touch I'm not paying for expensive phone calls. Some phone companies in the US allow free phone calls to certain countries So if your parents don't use technology, this may be a helpful option.

Can other members of your family help with your parents?

How flexible would your company be about giving you time off if you needed to go back to the UK for a visit? Could your friends or family from the UK come and visit you? I am alone in the UK and this is something I find very hard, all of my friends and family are in different countries.

Does the city where you are moving have a big ex-pat community? Internation's is a very good website for finding people in your area. Usually, I have found good information on sites like this