To ask if this is normal for a 3.5

[thelyreof]

Doesn't share and snatches constantly
Makes noise (singing yelling random screeching) constantly
Always pushing and climbing on parents
Doesn't listen so won't stop doing something when asked to
Will run off when out and about and not listen when told to stop I.e when on scooter just keeps going!

If people are playful with him he finds it hard to calm down like a puppy and touches adults at playgroups roughly like he does with us and his sister - a bit pokey and not nice - this really does not seem normal to me.

He will sit still to watch his favourite programme sometimes if he is tired but easily gets distracted. His sleep is fine.

Every one of his peers seems so calm and well behaved in comparison - he just seems manic

Is he summer born or winter born? If Im honest he does sound like hes a little delayed (Im only saying this because mine has GGD and is 18months behind)
I would ask at school and see what the teachers noticed
Mines the same age and suspected autism, his teacher noticed a clear difference in his behaviour from other kids which is how the early years officer from the hospital came to be involved,
If youre worried, ask for a referral from your gp to your paed and if there's any issues they'll pick up on it :)

*and your DS's behaviour sounds somewhat similar to my DS

Agree with PP. if you think there's a problem then it's worth seeing your GP.....

It's certainly very different to my 3.5 year old, but obviously all children are different.
I'd have a word with your HV.

They're all different but that does sound very different. Most can share/take turns by 3 at latest. What does nursery say?

Doesn't sound abnormal to me! Sounds similar to my ds at that age. He'd always run off, would have to constantly remind him to be gentle and sharing was hit n miss. He was a pain in the ass at playgroups and I stopped going due to his behaviour. I was worried and mentioned it to his pead who said there was nothing wrong with him. The only thing my ds had delayed was speech. He is a happy and normal 5yo now. I've always had to be very strict with my ds. Every child is different. If you're worried of course see your gp/hv/pead. But this could just be him.

He sounds a little young but nothing major. I recommend reading Toddler Taming by Dr Christopher Greene. I found it a Godsend my copy fell apart from constant use.

Is your son the eldest? My NT daughter was bloody hard work. However her younger sister has a learning disability and was very easy. SEN does not automatically equate to poor behaviour

He had speech delay but has mostly caught up now.

I asked his key worker what his behaviour was like at and she said he was absolutely fine! And seemed shocked when I said I struggled with him at home.... I was shocked to be honest..

Forgot to say the snatching and not sharing is mainly with his sister who is 22 months younger
He is okay with other children

Oh you have my ds. Wondered why it was so quiet.

I just wish there was a playgroup for likeminded children. Everyone I know has impeccably well behaved children! I come away from meeting them feeling so much worse... I know I know comparison is the thief of joy..

I know that feeling, My child was feral spirited! I used to dread playgroups or playdates with smaller children. He's still very strong minded and stubborn at 5 and does random idiotic things but has a heart of gold most of the time.
Like you I also spoke to his preschool and now first school teachers to ask what his behaviour was like there and they said it's fine, I was shocked too!! We have to have very clear rules in our house and stick to them. His behaviour is getting better as he gets older.