Dfriend was recently awarded an annual prize by the national association of her discipline, for a research project she did.
Her department threw a champagne reception for her and other award winners (a few at different levels).
At the reception, I said to DH of Dfriend: "Congratulations for your wife's award". (he came up to me and it sounded like the right thing to say?)
He responded:
"Well it would have been very difficult for her to avoid winning it since she was the only one who completed a project [at her level], and they had to give the award to somebody"
He basically meant that since there were no other nominees for this annual prize, and she was the only one who completed a project in that discipline in that year, she kinda got the award by default.
I felt disappointed. I have not socialized much with this DH, mostly spending one-on-one time with Dfriend, but she always speaks very highly of him and they seem like a perfect, loving, supportive couples. She has also taken a "lower" sort of career to move where his career is flourishing. In a time where most my other friends, and myself, are all separated/divorced, they really seem as if they have a relationship to aspire to. I found myself thinking if this is the "bitchy" kind of comment this supposedly perfect husband says behind his wife's back (I had no idea before she had got the award because there was noone else to give it to that year), then honestly what hope is there for the rest of us?
My sister says I am reading too much in a throwaway comment and he was probably just tired from being at the reception, and not everything is about gender. I said "The only acceptable response when someone says Congratulations (for anything), is "thank you".
AIBU?
AIBU?
To think this is a dick thing to say by Dfriend's DH
Evelight · 09/06/2017 13:56
But how is it any of your concern OP why your friend's husband says, seeing he isn't your husband.
And why should your friend tell you that there was only one contender, are you super close, do you tell each other everything?
"I do look up to their relationship" Really weird and over invested.
for going through a breakup that's really shitty. You should take care of yourself and not concern yourself with other people's relationships, whilst healing and getting over your break up.
No man or woman is perfect. And not all men are arses.
Lol at people saying the OP is over invested in the friends relationship and going into great detail why despite having never met said friends and the OP has 
But you do a little OP 
could be awkward attempt at humour, his normal personality, lack of social decorum, they could have had a massive row and he was feeling particularly upset and mean, who knows. If someone witnessed an argument between you and your partner and they posted a thread on here about how they think you might be being put down a lot by your partner because they shouted at you would that be valid if they had witnessed about twenty seconds of it? No. And all this was was a comment .
Eve hopefully someone great will cross your path.
"Are there no people in your life whose relationship you look up to"
Of course not. I don't really think about other people's relationships, unless I know that a friend is unhappy and is going through a difficult time, in which case I will listen to them and support them if I can.
To me other people's relationships are private, none of my business and utterly uninteresting. I think about my friends themselves but I don't think about their work, their relationship or their children at any length, again unless they are telling me that they are going through a difficult or especially interesting time. The last thing i'd do is to find faults in my friends' relationships it just wouldn't occur to me. I'm baffled by it.
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