It's probably me but what can I change to help my situation

[SilverShapesColors]

I must be the problem here as this turns out to be the situation all the time and it's just getting me so down. I need outside perspectives because I'm just not getting what I'm doing wrong.

My problem is that every relationship- friendship, family, colleagues just end up treating me the same. Will try to explain- childhood was horrific with emotional abuse by my mother and I can understand why family treat me this way. But I have been very careful to keep friends separate so why does it end up in the same situation.

I have a group of friends who are really lovely but it's like they are politely pleasant to me rather than friendly. 4 of us have had babies within the same year and the rest of them don't have kids. But with my Ds they barely have anything to ask yet with the others they want to know details about their babies. I just can't understand what's the difference from all 4 of us.

I'm the only sahm from all of us and we are very fortunate. My husbands job allows us to travel with him to really nice countries (this is relevant). Recently we all got together and one of my friends was talking about an exciting trip and said she was researching all the best places to visit. It really upset me that everyone ignored the fact that I actually lived there for a few years! It's little things like this which seems petty but it's so hurtful to me.

My dh and I live a very fortunate life, but we have made huge sacrifices to do so. But it feels like people are upset with us for it somehow (not sure if I'm making sense). We NEVER speak about our trips, work, or anything that might come across as boasting .in fact I'm so extra cautious not to mention anything along those lines in case it comes across the wrong way.

Same thing at work before leaving, any achievements I felt like I had to hide as people would just be annoyed with me.

It's like this cycle, I don't speak about anything dh or I have or do in case it comes across as showing off, but then when people find out it's like I'm too good to share it with anyone. I just don't know if i come across in a bad way. I hope I'm making sense, I would like some advice /insight please.

I think you're too closed off for fear of boasting, so maybe your friends think you don't want to talk about it. Self fulfilling prophecy, if you like.

For example, the place you used to live, it wouldn't be boasting to say "hey I know a bit about it, happy to answer any questions if you like?" Put yourself forward a bit more. I bet they do

Maybe send a message to the friend suggesting a few great options for where she's going (or helpful stuff relevant to her eg child friendly or such). That you're excited for her trip and hope she has a great time.
People don't remember details about others very well.

Could u be coming across as very closed off if you never talk about yourself

Tbh you're expecting them to make too much effort. As PPs said your friends might have forgotten you lived there or think you don't want to talk about it. People who live with emotional abuse often internalise a lot and I think you might be doing that. People won't know what you want from them or how much you want to share, unless you tell them