To force DH into going to the optician/GP's- (i.e make an appointment for him like his Mother!!)

[Whatwankeryisthis]

My DH has had a swollen eyelid for a couple of days, getting progressively worse.

Today I've had a good look and there are two ulcer looking things on the underside of his eyelid.

He's determined to just leave it and "see" (sorry!!) if they'll go away.

My opinion is "it's IN your EYE!!!!! If it's still there tomorrow you need to go and have it looked at, YOUR EYE!!!"

AIBU?? I haven't seen a doctor in a few years, either for myself or the DC so I certainly don't March anyone to the GP for minor things but I really don't think I'd be taking my vision/eye health for granted if it was me.

Has anyone experienced this in their eye?

Make the appointment - it's not just a routine eye test that he could do or not on his own, it's potentially more serious.

Doctors and hospitals are 'scary' places for men

Really?

scary place for men no I don't agree.
Scary is probably not quite the correct word. Are you familiar with the health service? Have you ever had to deal with an organisation that you haven't got a clue how it works but has a reputation for being condescending, rude, abrupt, awkward, difficult and saying 'no'? And then when you try and stand your ground you get the 'zero tolerance' spiel. Because that's how it is for men.

Doctors and hospitals are 'scary' places for men
Really?
Yes.

Dingalingalingaling of course I have had to deal with large complex organisations. I just don't understand why 'women' are apparently ok to do that but not men. It saddens me that this is accepted as a normal thing. Oh and I bet these 'men' are perfectly capable of navigating large organisations at work.

Just telling it how it is from experience.

Doctors and hospitals are 'scary' places for men

And just as scary for women but we've had to face our fears and go and get ourselves or loved ones treated, facing these unfamiliar and intimidating places. Men can overcome their fears too if they put their mind to it. I can't imagine I'd ever make a GP appointment for a partner unless either he was too ill to arrange it or he was unable to because he was insanely busy. Their health is their responsibility, I'm not their mother.

They're styes surely? Looks exactly like a stye my 7 year old recently had. We got antibiotic drops from the doctor on the advice of a pharmacist.

Will he go and show it to a pharmacist?

Scary places for men....what a load of sexist bullshit. Luckily my boyfriend is an adult and trotted off to hospital to see a Dr without fear when he had urgent need...he even spoke to the receptionist by himself...and she wasn't even a stereotypical receptionist either!

Op I'd encourage your dh to go and even make the appointment if you feel it's necessary but ultimately it's his decision to go

I don't think eyes are worth the risk of "wait and see" - yes, it might be nothing but is your husband really willing to take the risk of damaging/losing his vision because he can't be bothered to ring the GP?

It's not like a cut that might just end in a bad scar - he could end up really messing with his vision for life if he doesn't go and get seen.

I do it all the time for my DP he's too scared to go so I just wheel him off on the day 🌝He'd probably be dead without me though, he literally used to not eat for days before he met me. Weirdo.

YANBU to do your best to encourage him to go.

YABU to talk of "forcing" him to go. He's an adult and you are not in a position of authority over him. If somebody came on here saying their DH had "forced" them to do something, everyone would be saying LTB.

Tell him some of the things people have said here about potentially losing his vision, but ultimately it has to be his choice.