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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go and kick my neighbour's arse?

112 replies

Springersrock · 04/06/2017 08:46

We have an 18 year old cat. She's quite thin, a bit rickety and looks like she's been dragged through a hedge backwards. Her sight is a bit dodgy and she's doesn't go far these days, just mooches around our house and garden.

We've had some glorious weather lately and her absolute favourite thing ever is to snooze the afternoon away on a manhole cover in our front garden (I assume the sun is warming the manhole cover up for her)

5 times in the last few weeks someone has taken her to the RSPCA as she's being neglected. The cat is chipped and the RSPCA call us and we go and pick her up. After the second time the RSPCA recommended we put a photo of cat in our front window explaining she's elderly and that she lives here and to come and knock if anyone has any concerns. Which we did.

Yesterday I get another call. Someone has taken cat to the RSPCA, can we go and get her.

I was chatting to the man behind the desk and he said it was the same person each time and that the RSPCA have told them 4 times that cat is fine, just old and to stop taking her in. The man described the person and it's my bloody neighbour (5 doors down). Looking back, I've caught my neighbour in my garden a few times but just assumed she was stroking/making a fuss of cat

Cat would have found the whole thing distressing. She's always hated the cat carrier and going in the car (for this reason, we use a mobile vet who comes out to us). Cat always stops eating when she's stressed and her eating is pretty erratic at the moment as it is.

I went over to see neighbour yesterday but she wouldn't speak to me and just shut the door in my face.

So now, my poor old lady is going to have to be confined to the house and I'm fucked right off

OP posts:
Original poster
Springersrock · 04/06/2017 10:57

Thanks all!

Took a note down to her - she was in her front garden but as soon as she saw me she went inside. I knocked but she wouldn't answer the door so posted the letter through her door.

We already have a sign up in the front window but making another and putting one on a stake next to the manhole cover is a good idea. Will do that today.

We've tried collars too but cat takes them straight off

Will give 101 a ring too.

The lady isn't old - 50ish I'd guess.

I do try and keep my eye on her when she's out there but I can't watch her 24/7. Yesterday DH had been cutting the front lawn, came round to do the back. After about 10 minutes poked his head out to check cat and she'd gone. Was looking round the house for her (sometimes she'll hide indoors) when the RSPCA called.

We have a manhole cover set into the patio but cat isn't interested in that one, only the one out the front will do

OP posts:
IHateUncleJamie · 04/06/2017 10:58

If you've already told this bloody woman to stop trespassing on your property and taking your poor cat, you absolutely can report it to the Police as harassment and possibly even theft, if she's taking the cat with the intention of permanently deprive you of your property (i.e. the cat). A PCSO can go and speak to the neighbour.

MatildaTheCat · 04/06/2017 10:58

I have a cat ages 17 and she's in remarkably good nick but absolutely hates going in the cat carrier or car. I'd be raging if this happened to us.

Your note should be very direct indeed: the cat is fine as evidenced by the RSPCA, she is both trespassing and stealing ( catnapping?!) when she does this. Threaten the possibility of legal action if it ever happens again.

EwanWhosearmy · 04/06/2017 11:00

Our elderly cat disappeared and I put a lost notice on FB. Luckily the person who "found" her put a notice on a different FB page and somebody saw both. We'd contacted the 3 local vets but he'd taken her to one further away.

The 3rd time he took her, the vet rang us because they recognised her. The vet said somebody was doing exactly the same with her own elderly cat.

Didn't ever find out who he was, except that he lives on our road and can't be more than a few doors away because she didn't ever go far from the garden.

Sadly she is no longer with us, and our cats now are housecats.

Why are people such busybodies?

Iloveyouthismuch · 04/06/2017 11:02

She shut the door in OP's face because she knows what she's been doing is wrong. If she had dementia I doubt she would have done that.

Dementia is often accompanied by anxiety. She may have shut the door because she was afraid! Or she may be a deeply unpleasant person. Who knows? I think you are doing the right thing by dropping a note through her door and mentioning it to nearby animal rescue places - preferably by e-mail with a photo attached and the name and number of your vet/rspca contact who can verify your version of events. Best of luck. My heart is breaking a wee bit for your old puss.

GlitteryFluff · 04/06/2017 11:05

Hope she listens to the note

fanfrickintastic · 04/06/2017 11:06

We had a disabled and epileptic cat. Knew he wouldn't live too long but wanted to give him the best life possible. We live in a nice quiet area so let him out the house, which was the biggest enjoyment for him. He walked funny and had issues with his skin, but wasn't contagious. He had a collar with a note on, saying he was special but loved and cared for.

3 times the neighbor took him to the RSPCA. First time the officer gave me what for (why haven't you taken him to the vet, he's clearly been hit by a car and he has a terrible flea infestation, we need to do a home visit to see if you are fit to keep him) but quickly shut the fuck up when I reeled off his 4 medical conditions and 8 daily medications/ creams. The neighbour wouldn't stop though and kept bringing him home when she saw him out on the street despite me explaining and explaining.

No advice, but I understand. Neighbours can be PITA at times!

Original poster
Springersrock · 04/06/2017 11:14

Just had a quick chat with 101

They say it's not theft as she's not taking with a view to keeping it permanently. They've given me a reference number and I'm to call if it happens again and someone will speak to her about harassment.

Lots of sympathy to all who have lost their cats and to those having the same issues.

We lost her sister earlier this year and cat has aged visibly since so I'm not sure we'll have her much longer so I just want her to spend her remaining time happy and stress free

OP posts:
CloudNinetyNine · 04/06/2017 11:14

Could you also let other neighbours know what's happening. They may be able to intervene if they see her in action.

JaneEyre70 · 04/06/2017 11:17

In honesty, I'd keep your cat in. I know you shouldn't have to, but if she's been to the RSPCA 4 times, she's not taking it on board that your cat is fine. She sounds batshit frankly, and lord knows where she will take it if she's warned off from the RSPCA. It's better that she's safe indoors than being dragged off god knows where. I'm angry on your behalf!!

kali110 · 04/06/2017 11:30

Not theft??? Imagine if the cat wasn't chipped! One of mil isn't because like yours it's goes apeshit when it even sees a catbox. Thankfully its never had to see a vet in years.
Think this woman is lucky.
Mine are housecats now, we don't even let them sit on the drive anymore ( after reading things on here) and the old one would have scratched or bit the shit out of her Grin

hmcAsWas · 04/06/2017 11:34

I think that's a good result from the 101 - they have agreed to speak to her about harassment if she persists which should do the trick

I am aghast at this woman - what on earth is she thinking??

BlossomCat · 04/06/2017 11:41

I'm so glad my old lady just stuck to our back garden for her last summer, she was such a scrawny old thing. But very content.

My younger boy got taken to the RSPCA by a kindly neighbour when he escaped as I was trying to take him to the vets for a fighting abscess. I had to jump through hoops to try and prove that I was intending to treat him. He then got reported to the RSPCA a few days later.
I had fed him two breakfasts when he made a dash for the door. Within half an hour I had a lovely officer on my door asking if he was mine. I had to explain that the reason he had a bald neck was because the RSPCA hospital had treated him.
Apparently the woman who reported him had been feeding him for two years as she thought he was a stray. Not a stray, just a greedy bastard!

Oldraver · 04/06/2017 11:42

I had this with one of my old cats...he had three operations in his last year so at times had bald patches and masses of stitches along his stomach and on his head...but this was ignored by the catnapper and they thought him a poor neglected cat.

They used to to throw ...but he's starving and gulped down food...no amount of explaining that he needed a special diet and anyway cats were opportunists sank in. The cat missed doses of anti-b's and even a vet appointment because they kept him in. They actually made the last few months more stressful then it should of been.

I see the shit around town and I still feel rage at them

CupOfTeaAndAGoodBook · 04/06/2017 11:55

Odd that she is so afraid to actually speak to you in person given that she has the balls to sneak on to your property and repeatedly nick your cat. I bet if you could catch her in the act once that would put her off, sounds like she is scared of the confrontation.

Personally I'd be tempted to spend some extended time ringing her doorbell/knocking on her door to try and make your point face-to-face. Even if she never does answer, a good long spell of that might give her an inkling that this isn't a good deed she's doing, there's actually a very pissed off cat owner she's affecting.

paddypants13 · 04/06/2017 11:56

I am Angry on your behalf op. Is it worth you sending letters to the other local rescue centres and vets with a pic and a brief summary of what's been happening? Can you update her microchip details so there's a note that she is loved just very old?

I understand your neighbour doing it the first time but after that is ridiculous. I'm pleased to hear the pcso will speak to her about harassment if she does it again.

CupOfTeaAndAGoodBook · 04/06/2017 11:57

Could you also let other neighbours know what's happening. They may be able to intervene if they see her in action.

I bet it would also put Catnapper Lady off if you told her that other neighbours are aware what she's doing, too. She'd be more worried about getting caught then.

IHateUncleJamie · 04/06/2017 12:00

They say it's not theft as she's not taking with a view to keeping it permanently.

Ah but IF she is taking it to the RSPCA for them to take the cat, then she is taking it with a view to DEPRIVING YOU of the cat - which IS theft.

If she takes it and asks for the RSPCA to treat the cat so it can be returned to you, then no, it's not theft.

If she does it again and the RSPCA phones you, do ask them exactly what the woman says to them when she takes the cat in.

TheMaddHugger · 04/06/2017 12:24

Yes What Does she say to the RSPCA when she brings your cat in ?

lougle · 04/06/2017 12:31

This must be so frustrating! It does sound like harassment will fit better than theft, though.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 04/06/2017 12:40

Your poor cat and poor you. If someone tried this with my cat I would be the one being shut indoors by DH to stop me confronting them! You're much more polite than me, the only note she would have got would be telling her to fuck off and leave my fucking cat alone!

(I'm not usually like that, I just can't stand animal cruelty)

On a less confrontational note, do you know if she owns or rents? I was wondering whether it would be worth a chat with her landlord if she rents.

hmcAsWas · 04/06/2017 12:41

IHateUncleJamie I really don't think the OP needs to get bogged down in whether it constitutes theft or not. The police said 'no' and in any case are happy to take action for harassment if this problem persists

Greenkit · 04/06/2017 13:04

What about trespass on to your property, when you have told her not to, and then taking your cat.

IHateUncleJamie · 04/06/2017 13:10

hmc It is an important distinction. Control Room call takers are mostly civilian staff who don't actually know the law. So the OP shouldn't necessarily take their advice as read when it does depend upon the neighbour's motives.

Plus harrassment would be dealt with as a low priority by a PCSO - theft should be dealt with more quickly by an SNT officer.

IHateUncleJamie · 04/06/2017 13:11

Oops at erroneous "r" in harassment 👎🙊