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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU to not take her back to school after appt

24 replies

GettingScaredNow · 03/06/2017 08:24

On Tuesday I have a meeting with cafcass. It's in London and they want to meet dd. She's (very nearly) 5. I will take her to school before and collect her around 10. Have the meeting (could be up to 2 hours) and then I could either jump on a train and have her back for the last hour and a half, or, go to a museum or something.

I feel like just not taking her back. I feel like we will need that time together in the afternoon. It will be special for her and after she's spoken to cafcass I don't know how she's going to be.
She could be extremely clingy and upset. She could be totally unphased.

WIBU to keep her off the rest of the day??

OP posts:

ScarletSienna · 03/06/2017 08:26

She'll have missed afternoon registration so I would go and do something together.

Gileswithachainsaw · 03/06/2017 08:28

I wouldn't take her bag. By the time she's had the meeting then you guys have chatted and gone and had some lunch it's hardly worth knocking yourself out to try and get back for the last.

Have a leisurely lunch and a stroll round a park instead.

grasspigeons · 03/06/2017 08:29

Keep her off. She'll have been marked as absent for an appointment anyway. As long as it's not a regular thing. Just say you don't know how long the appointment will take (true) and how the trains will pan out (true)

DarkFloodRises · 03/06/2017 08:29

YANBU. Good luck with the appointment.

weirdsitu · 03/06/2017 09:00

I wouldn't worry about taking her back

It's been several years but I've had dealings with cafcass, hopefully it's the same as it was with my DS, they didn't ask or say anything that upset him. All very child friendly. Hope it goes ok xx

Tabymoomoo · 03/06/2017 09:11

Take her to natural history museum to see the dinosaurs! It's educational and she'll need some down time after a meeting that might be a bit stressful for her. Totally reasonable (and I'm a teacher!)

MaybeNextWeek · 03/06/2017 09:18

If you're picking her up at 10 I'd just keep her off all day and make it an enjoyable day out. She's not even 5 its not like she's 15 and doing GCSEs.

TeenAndTween · 03/06/2017 09:40

I agree with maybe - don't take her to school at all that day. (And I am usually very anti missing school for anything)

BikeRunSki · 03/06/2017 09:46

It's hardly worth going in for the first hour either!

NHM after the appointment definitely. I went to school in South Kensington, we went there all the time, it's very educational 😄

grasspigeons · 03/06/2017 09:46

I'd take her in in the morning as she would get her attendance mark for the morning session and I'd give a copy of the cafcas letter. You never know what's ahead (tummy bugs, flu) so that attendance mark and letter might be useful later on. Depends how 'attendance mad' your school is.

cheeeekyavocado · 03/06/2017 09:48

I wouldn't bother at all that day for the sake of an hour.

Just tell school it's going to be to difficult to make it work.

Have a lovely day together!

AndNowItIsSeven · 03/06/2017 09:52

Your dd isn't even compulsory school age definitely keep her off.

Roomster101 · 03/06/2017 09:58

I wouldn't bother sending her to school at all on that day if she's only 5. Make the day as stress free as possible.

Mexxi · 03/06/2017 10:06

To be honest, i wouldn't take her in at all. Where I teach, parents are encouraged to bring children in to be registered and then take them out so it looks better for the attendance figures, but it seems silly to me especially if the first hour is an assembly or some such. I certainly wouldn;t take your daughter back for the last hour or so either.

ASauvingnonADay · 03/06/2017 10:27

I would take her in for the morning as you've planned and take her somewhere like a museum in the afternoon.

Original poster

GettingScaredNow · 03/06/2017 10:42

I did broach the idea of not going in at all but she got upset about not getting her attendance wristband (which at first I thought was good but now I'm annoyed about this. I think it's unnecessary pressure)

Also, I don't know if it would look bad to the cafcass person if dd hasn't been in at all that day when she could have been for an hour?

OP posts:

ForalltheSaints · 03/06/2017 10:46

I'm not sure about the museum visit- why not just have a walk and something to eat, and then go home.

MimsyFluff · 03/06/2017 10:49

Go have fun it's not even a legal requirement for her to be in school yet.

2boytrouble · 03/06/2017 11:48

@ForalltheSaints what's wrong with the museum? If anything it's educational and enjoyable! Win win!

PickAChew · 03/06/2017 11:52

She will need lunch, anyhowso I would definitely take her to do something nice to de-stress.

cheeeekyavocado · 03/06/2017 14:33

I'm not sure about the museum visit- why not just have a walk and something to eat, and then go home.

Why on earth not?

Surely that's personal preference how to spend a free afternoon, the OP was only asking if others was return to school or not.

embo1 · 03/06/2017 15:23

Is this preschool?

youaredeluded · 03/06/2017 16:19

She isn't even of legally school age yet!

youaredeluded · 03/06/2017 16:20

legal... bloody aurocorrect

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