To think you just don't say this?

[luckylucky24]

This has been bothering me for a couple of weeks now.

We had a boiler issue and a friend of DH's family came to have a look. Needed a part said he would get it and come back.
This guy is nice enough but mid 50's and still lives in his mums back bedroom. He gives off a slightly creepy vibe, black teeth, poor hygiene but harmless enough.
Anyway, the first time he came the kids were in bed, he stayed for a while after he had taken a look at the problem and asked about our DS. We mentioned we now have a DD too. At that he came out with "little girls are my weakness". He followed it up with "not in a creepy way".
The following week when he came round to fix it me and DD were in the house alone and he kept watching her and tried to get her to give him a cuddle, openly admiring her. Now this wouldn't have bothered me much if it hadn't been for his comment the previous week.
AIBU or do others agree that this is the sort of thing that you NEVER come out with?! I was quite uncomfortable around him after that.

I wouldnt have him around my child ever again

Urgh. I wouldn't have let him back in, let alone let him try to give my daughter a cuddle.

I always think it is very odd to try to hug children you barely know. Why on Earth would you want to, or imagine they would want to?

Urgh. I wouldn't have let him back in, let alone let him try to give my daughter a cuddle.

I always think it is very odd to try to hug children you barely know. Why on Earth would you want to, or imagine they would want to?

I wouldn't have him in my house ever again.

Sorry for the double post.

He may well not be "harmless enough".

Could be an innocent social awkwardness issue, but the risk that it is something else is too high.

Unless he's a shit hot Gas Safe registered engineer who has specialist knowledge of your exact boiler that nobody else is partial too - I'd not want to see him ever again.

Side note - assume he's legit / qualified / registered? Not just someone who 'knows about boilers' ?

Lots of people love children. My dh and late father adored them. But there are boundaries you just don't cross. Asking for hugs and physical contact especially when you don't know the child is not on. I would be wary.

Yes I always think it odd too. Luckily my daughter is too shy to entertain a hug and I never put her down after that. Carried her around the house until he left!

Hope you and your DAD were assertive enough to NOT have her forced to give him a cuddle?!

Oh good - crossed posts x

McGee he is a qualified professional. The one and only reason he was used was because we are on the bones of our arse and he gives us mates rates.
Hopefully we won't be needing his services again.

Yuck, very odd.
I take it he doesn't have his own children at all?
I always find it creepy when I see " daddy's little princess " tattooed on grown women too - gross

McGee, I wouldn't LET her give him a hug never mind encourage it. If she had looked like she may even entertain the idea I would have stepped in with an excuse about his smoking and her asthma.

No cream, don't think he has ever had a LTR at all.

I wouldn't have him in the house ever again. "Harmless Enough" is one thing but there's a creepy vibe for a reason and that was a vile thing to say, it'd be different if he had several daughters or granddaughters - actually no, it's still bloody creepy. No. Vile.

Never let him in your house again. Make sure he has no access to your daughter ever.

I feel physically ill after reading this post.

I'm just glad nothing awful happened. Please don't ever have anything to do with this person ever again.

Better to err on the side of caution in cases like this.

I am glad people agree. The whole time he was here on that second visit I felt really mean for not letting him near her but obviously I was right too.
I mentioned to DH how I felt after the first visit and he said he is creepy but DH has known him his whole life and "he is completely harmless". DH's uncle is his best friend (uncle had a grown up DD) so I guess that's where DH's trust comes from.
I have been with DH for 8 years and this is the first time I met this guy. Hopefully the last.

Yuck!

I'm shuddering just thinking about it.

I'd never have him near the house again.

Just reading your post made my skin crawl

Meh. Aunt-in-laws new fella said the same when he met my DD and me for the first time. In his 40s with no children of his own - always wanted a daughter. That's the reason he likes little girls. Not creepy at all. He also tried to get a cuddle off her. I just think he feels sad and sees his 'could-have-beens' around the daughters he always wanted.

So, I think his comment was harmless enough, but inappropriate perhaps.

I don't think any workman should try to get cuddles off a kid they don't know though. It's over-stepping professional boundaries.

Check he's registered with Gas Safe. You can do that online. No matter what he claims, check it.

And always trust your feelings. True paedophiles are clever and manipulative.

I've been thinking about this, and I appreciate you might not feel able to do this, but I do think that if I were you, I'd mention this to my local Police. It might be nothing sinister - but if they are aware of any other suspicions or allegations about him, it could be important information which could protect other little girls.