Contact

[Lovelybythebeach]

Hi, I have a court order that state I drops my son off for contact to my ex husbands house and he returns him. He is going to move house, about 30 miles away, and still expects me to drop my son off for contact to his new address regardless of where it is.
I am a single working parent of two, my other son refuses to see his dad and this was agreed in court and with cafcass involvement. I will not leave work early to facilitate this. I also have commitments to my other sons activities at this time.
As he is the one that has moved I think he should now have to make plans to collect our son from an agreed location that is about the same distance form me as his old address.
Any advice?
Thanks

I have a court order that state I drops my son off for contact to my ex husbands house and he returns him.

Ask your ex nicely if he will agree to vary the order. If not, it's back to court

He does not respond to asking nicely. Do I initiate court proceedings or wait for him to. My plan was just to stand my ground and I think he is being unreasonable, and wait for him to take me back.

I believe the rule is that the parent who moves away must do the travelling. Check it out.

That's what I thought, and will certainly check. Thanks your input SDMB and ttf

Its completely unreasonable of him to expect you to do that!

I would just say i'm not going it and then let him take you back to court if he likes?

Why is he moving away? what a twat!

My ex expects me to drive 5 hours to drop my DC off to him we go to court next week about it and i am curious and worried what the court will order - i won't do it though either way they can send me to jail but no way i'll do that.

😂 yeah that's one of many ways to describe him. He says he's moving for financial reasons ( but no details) , but to be honest I don't care. He just needs to make sure he has considered how he will manage contact going forwards rather than expect me to manage it for him.
I agree it's unreasonable, he hasn't even suggested a compromise.

A 10 hour round trip?! Pretty impossible to fit into a normal daily routine I'd say

be reasonable.

ie give reasonable reasons why this it is notpossible to facilitate this without some adjustment to the arrangements.

eg: work.
other child's activities (best interests he continues this and you come to some other arrangement for facilitating contact. )

I suspect taht you will have to go back to court for a variation. as a non layer I would think it is a bit dodgy not following the court order without clarification. 30 miles is about a 1hour 40 minute round trip?

offs, the heat has got to my typing/brain

One thing that might be relevant that court said when we went last time is that the childrens activities should continue as normal - so he might be expected to travel to them anyway. think it depends on the age of the children etc

Thank you.
I would have to leave work early to agree to his demands.
My other son aged 11 has activities that would be disrupted as I could not leave him to travel about 2 hrs ( but he has yet to give me exact details).
I have a solicitor but he is VERY expensive. Maybe I'll drop him an email so things are done correctly.