Allergies, food and breastfeeding... oh my

[DuckAndPancakes]

Help...
Nearly 10 month old son has been diagnosed with milk allergy (finally, after waiting three months for a referral and testing). The consultant has completely knocked me on my arse. We started the weaning journey at around six months, DS wasn't interested in foods at all. No big deal, we thought. Slowly started to become more interested when the signs of milk allergy showed up. He was into cheese, but it made him projectile vomit afterwards. He was into porridge made up with cows milk, but it made him sick after. I realised the issue was milk so stopped giving him anything with milk in it.

We tried constantly to be giving him bits of food, anything really that he would try. He continued to not be interested but breastfed well and continues to do so. He's still not interested in food though.

At the appointment with consultant, she basically told me that I need to withhold breastfeeding from him to make him hungry and encourage him to eat solid food instead. Despite the fact he's tolerated certain foods that have got traces of milk in them, we have now been told that he's to exclude absolutely everything. She told me my breast milk is low in iron and that he is at high risk for anemia because he's not eating food and not being given formula.

I spent all of last night feeling like a total failure and that I've been getting it all wrong. I thought that making sure he was fed in some capacity was the best thing for me to be doing and now I feel like I've made it all worse. Searching the amount of iron he needs (11mg a day apparently) and I can't work out how I'm supposed to get that in him.

I'm conflicted. Any help or advice appreciated :(

Withholding breastfeeding from a 10 month old who isn't interested in solid food is... unusual advice. Some paediatricians know zilch about breastfeeding as it usually doesn't form any part of standard medical training. A baby who isn't that interested in solid food usually doesn't have a strong association between hunger and solids yet, so withholding his main source of food (and comfort, and closeness) to make him "hungry enough to eat" could easily leave you with a miserable, hungry baby who still doesn't want to eat solids.

I wouldn't ever tell anyone to ignore medical advice from a HCP but if it were me, I sure as hell would seek a second opinion asap. If you have a CMPA diagnosis, could your gp refer you directly to a dietician who specialises in this? Or could you afford to go private? Many NHS consultants with a private practice on the side will get you back into the NHS system after a single consultation, especially if there are tests etc. to do or other referrals (like to a dietician) to be made.

In the meantime, please take a read of this page on Kellymom about iron supplementation because current research suggests that the risk of iron deficiency in ebf babies is very low, and that iron supplementation carries its own risks. Unless your baby's haemoglobin levels have shown up low in a blood test, I'd be asking any HCP banging on about low iron levels in ebf babies if they were familiar with this research.

Hang in there, OP.

When she suggested withholding his milk feeds in preference to giving him solids because "a hungry baby will eat" I pretty much shouted "no no absolutely not no, he is breastfed on demand". I feel like she wasn't particularly keen on breastfeeding as she was continually asking me when I was going to stop and pushing the idea of formulas. This could just me being defensive and paranoid though!

She said there was a potential to be referred to a dietician but nothing forthcoming. She also said she would discuss with a colleague as to whether I should cut dairy from my diet again. It's been a lot of conflicting advice from HCPs and I don't think it has helped that all of this has taken so long to come around. We had been letting DS have stuff that had dairy in but nothing with "fresh/pure" dairy in IYSWIM?

Can't afford to do anything privately unfortunately, not without having to borrow money that I can't realistically afford to pay back.

Consultant is referring back to the GP and we should apparently expect a letter detailing everything shortly so will see what happens.

Trying to not feel downtrodden or overly stressed but struggling a bit. Being massively slee deprived doesn't help!

( oh and no blood tests done or anything with regards to iron, just that the woman kept going on about how low in iron breast milk is and how he's at high risk of it because he's not eating many/any solids)

You've had loads of great advice, I'm just posting to agree that continuing to bf is absolutely the right thing to do if you're happy to do so! I've just stopped bf my 2 year old and we've both been dairy free for 20 months. I found weaning was a bit tricky at first, she wasn't interested really until 7 months (which my HV was totally fine with) and then very into finger food and ready brek. I mixed it with puréed pear or any fruit really, then used an alternative milk. It's got tons of calcium and vitamins in so ideal.

Hummus was a big favourite, breadsticks, Ella's kitchen melty puffs, pasta twirls and anything she could feed herself. Obviously some of these were once it was more established, but try and relax about it and see what he's interested in. If soya is an option then there's the giraffe milk you could use and soya yogurts from Tesco are really nice (they have monkeys on) and taste of strawberry. You definitely need to speak to another GP or your HV about a seeing a dietician as they can give you support and information. A lot is available online but always nice to see and chat so it's tailored to you.
Good luck and well done xx

Ah; if baby hasn't been actually diagnosed with iron deficiency anemia or even tested for it then it sounds like really it's not worth worrying about! I agree that bm is so good for many nutrients that with holding it would seem really odd. Especially when baby is not crazy about eating just yet. I would worry that might up the stress levels not reduce them, and low stress is likely to help the feeding journey. Would hope that as baby's gut improves with dairy exclusion, that may help to increase interest in food.
Would be wondering if seeing a different paediatrician might help when you are up for a review? Have heard there are good cmpa support groups out there maybe on Facebook but don't know the names. I am thinking if your paediatrician thought anemia was a real possibility, they would have actually tested for it no???!!!

My daughter has cmpa, thankfully now growing out of it. We did the milk ladder last year and got to the point where she showed no reaction to any dairy other than milk, so she's fine with yogurt, cheese, butter etc.
She was over 6 months and combination fed when she was prescribed the dairy free formula. It tastes foul. FOUL. It would be a real struggle to get a 10 month old breastfed baby to start drinking it or even having it mixed in food. Tastes like mouldy fish and potatoes. Grim.
My daughter is 2 now and still barely eats, still drinks soya milk. Survives off toast and cheerios. In the past we've reduced her soya milk and she loses weight, doesn't make her eat any more. I get frustrated when people tell me 'babies won't starve themselves' or 'she'll eat when she's hungry' because it's just not true.!
Keep doing what you think is best. Our consultant referred us to a dietician, and also our health visitor says that she can refer directly to dietician too so that might be an option for you.
I don't think reducing breastfeeding is a sensible option. Making additions to his diet and prioritising iron rich food, yes. Reducing his main source of nutrition, no!

I BF my CMPA and soya allergic baby for 2.5 years - staying off milk and soya myself as she reacted through my milk.
We were told of the problem with BF and iron, and were advised to give red meats and green vegs etc - which DD happily ate thankfully!

Your consultant is correct in saying that your baby is in a high risk group for anaemia - he's not eating well, and is EBF, but he is currently well and not showing signs of anaemia - so what you need is advise to keep him well and give him iron. So feed him iron rich foods as much as you can....you can google these but they include meats, green veg, sweet potatoes, mushrooms, squash and prune juice. Try to keep offering them in his diet, as finger foods or blended and given on a spoon....see what he'll try - weaning is a bit hit and miss at first for both baby and parent!

most of all you are not a failure! you have fed your baby for 10 months - kept him well despite CMPA, and given him the best start you could. you don't need to introduce formula now - dairy free formula is disgusting and i doubt he'll take it anyway......

my little one drinks oat milk - she says it is the most like Breast Milk LOL :) she could talk fully when I weaned her off the breast so could offer her opinion on each milk we tried which helped!

well done - and good luck