To have not given sister money for her birthday?

[NurseScorne]

In our family we tend to give the kids money in a card for birthdays. This stops once the kids are adults. My sister was 22 last week so I sent a card without money in it. The week before was my birthday and she didn't even send me a card.

Anyway my mother is furious and not speaking to me - she has started slagging me off to relatives saying I "didn't even bother putting money in sisters card". My relative stated that as she's an adult, it's understandable but my mother got arsey with relative and said "but DD2 is her SISTER!". Relative pointed out that I was HER sister and had received sweet FA for my birthday, not even a card so how is it any different? My mum replied "well, I suppose I didn't think of it like that but I still think she could have given her something".

I'm fuming about the outrage of injustice for my sister when I didn't even receive a card on my birthday! We're both adults, yes I'm older than her but we're both independent adults!

The favouritism is so fucking irritating. On my wedding day they turned up at the last minute (MIL and SIL helped me get ready!) as they decided that would be a good day to help sister with her house hunting. Afterwards they complained that it was a "long day for everyone" like my wedding was some kind of fucking chore.

AIBU about the lack of birthday money and AIBU to consider limiting contact from now on?

I intend to, to be fair its only ever me that makes the phone call anyway. If I don't call, I won't hear from them.

I've really had it with them. They've been to my house twice in the past year. On one occasion I showed them my holiday pictures only for my mum to burst out laughing at one of me saying "oh god that's awful! Was you half asleep there? No sorry ... I don't like that one!!" And each time her idiot husband has taken the puss out of what I feed my dog making out that I insist on all my animals being vegetarians (completely untrue, the dog eats meat).

This year he sent my 84 year old grandmother a birthday card featuring naked women with one circled and the label "you" attached to one of the women. She's upset. He thinks he's hilarious. He's an absolute fuckwit.

Ignore them, spend the money that you would normally have sent to sister on a bunch of flowers or bottle of wine or something for family member who stood up for you

Family members who stuck up for me were my amazing aunt (who I relate to much more than my mother but I have to hide how much we're in contact as mother gets insanely jealous!) and my beautiful grandmother

They sound really immature to be honest. I think she is also quite jealous of you. Those silly comments about your photos would just boil my piss. .......... I mean who says that?????