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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Manager coming to house

63 replies

jarhead123 · 22/05/2017 10:15

Want to keep this brief for confidentiality reasons, but would you consider it reasonable for a manager (owner of business) to visit you at home while off sick to see how you're doing (and also put pressure on you to return)

Thanks!

OP posts:
Xmasbaby11 · 22/05/2017 10:59

Yikes, that sounds like overstepping the boundaries doing an unannounced visit! What if you weren't at home?

I have been off work for 6 weeks following an operation. I was signed off for 6 weeks and told work this. I plan to email this week to discuss when I might return. I rested a lot in the early weeks and now I am getting more active, so I go out for a walk every day, sometimes friends visit or take me out to lunch. And I feel OK as long as I take painkillers and don't overdo it, but I am not ready to return to work. I would feel guilty if I was put under pressure, but I would also be angry as it is not fair to try to make someone come back to work until they are well.

Becca19962014 · 22/05/2017 11:02

When my work did this (not my manager a more senior one) I was out at a hospital appointment. It triggered a lot of problems as they accused me of not really being sick at all because I'd 'gone out for the day'.

In the end they got into a massive amount of trouble. Not only was I at a hospital appointment I was at a hospital appointment at the hospital I worked in, having tests, being seen by colleagues and had seen my manager whilst I was there to update him.

Literally the only bit that was verging on true was that I was out all day, even with massive waiting times to be seen that was pushing it.

The senior never bothered to ask either my manager or me about it just pressed ahead with a disciplinary. Making a total idiot of himself and the trust. I took my manager with me to the disciplinary as he'd seen me and he wiped the floor with his manager (which he enjoyed as he couldn't stand the man!)

They fired him.

Becca19962014 · 22/05/2017 11:04

(Fired man who came round obviously not my manager who was lovely)

Bluntness100 · 22/05/2017 11:06

I suspect being off sick for so long is causing them problems. I don't think they have done anything legally wrong, but I think uou also need to look at it from their side, especially in small companies a member of staff being off sick for two months can be difficult for them to cover.

millymae · 22/05/2017 11:09

As pockersaviour says lots of employers big and small do welfare visits but the fact that it wasn't done by prior arrangement is unusual to say the least.
It's a good job you were home!. As some one who was off sick for many months I had several visits from my Manager and as time went on she came with someone from HR, but I can honestly say that I never felt that they were harassing me back to work

NellieFiveBellies · 22/05/2017 11:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lynnm63 · 22/05/2017 11:12

I was long term sick from the civil service. Welfare officer would visit at home but they always made an appointment, never just turned up.

turnaroundbrighteyes · 22/05/2017 11:13

Totally normal although unusual not to be prearranged. One place I worked a few weeks before sick pay was due to end head of HR would visit with a basket of fruit as part of her preliminary investigation for dismissal. Became well known and upon sight of said basket of fruit most employees would return to work for at least 8 weeks (new period of sickness) even those who really weren't fit for work...

thenightsky · 22/05/2017 11:20

It is totally unacceptable where I work (NHS). However, personally, I wouldn't really mind if they called, as long as they came with flowers or cake and it was a genuinely caring person... pressuring you to return before you are well enough would certainly be uncool.

Jaxhog · 22/05/2017 11:22

Look at it from their point of view. If it's a small business and(especially) if you're on paid sick leave, it could be having a major impact on their business.

Depending on what you're signed off sick for, it could be that they are suspicious that you're not really sick. Seven weeks is quite a long time. It isn't unheard of for people to skive off with vague stress-related illness unfortunately. If you're genuinely sick, you have no need to feel guilty or under pressure to return.

confusedat23 · 22/05/2017 11:24

Hi OP It is actually compulsary for an employer to do welfare checks on anyone who is on long-term sickness, however they should give you the option of coming into work to do these checks too Smile

DingDong01 · 22/05/2017 11:48

Hi OP It is actually compulsary for an employer to do welfare checks on anyone who is on long-term sickness,
Nonsense. What law says that?

flossyfloss · 22/05/2017 11:50

It is appropriate and you will probably find its in the absence policy. It's common practice to hold regular long term sick meetings and if the employer is too sick to come to work for the meeting a home visit is very normal as a way of keeping in touch

DingDong01 · 22/05/2017 11:52

a home visit is very normal as a way of keeping in touch
By mutual arrangement. Not just turning up unannounced.

fluffiphlox · 22/05/2017 11:53

I think many policies will allow for a home visit but good practice would be to arrange a time, not to turn up unannounced.

flossyfloss · 22/05/2017 11:53

To add it should be a scheduled pre arranged meeting and not unannounced

SapphireStrange · 22/05/2017 11:55

There's no excuse for turning up unannounced. And saying they could really do with the OP back now Hmm –it's a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Willow2017 · 22/05/2017 12:11

fluffiphlox

This wasnt a 'sick meeting' it was unannounced on the pretext of asking how she was and was primarily to try to persuade op into going back sooner with guilt tripping her.

Totally not on.

Keep a record op and ask HR if this is part of their policy. They will probably be horrified.

Jux · 22/05/2017 12:40

If it were my current boss, I'd be fine with it. Any other boss I've ever had, no.

harderandharder2breathe · 22/05/2017 13:12

Totally reasonable to visit you, although should be possible for a neutral place if you don't want them in your home. They may not offer this but should accommodate it if you ask.

Totally unreasonable to put pressure on you to return to work

harderandharder2breathe · 22/05/2017 13:13

Turning up unannounced totally not ok

Roomba · 22/05/2017 13:28

I've done many home visits to employees who've been off sick - at my last place it had to be done if they'd been off four weeks and then at regular intervals.

However - this would always be agreed in advance with plenty notice. It would be utterly inappropriate to just turn up on someone's doorstep. The only occasion in 15 years I can think of that happening was when the employee wasn't answering calls or replying to emails/letters. The manager popped by on their way home out of concern (sadly the guy had died of heart problems). Afterwards I remember his boss saying 'I'm glad I went round but I know I shouldn't have really, I could be disciplined for that'.

Also, if anyone didn't want me coming to their house for any reason, it was always fine to arrange to meet in a coffee shop nearby or similar. There are loads of reasons you may not want your boss visiting your house - partner works at home, young kids at home, anxiety etc.

fluffiphlox · 22/05/2017 19:05

willow2017
Not sure why you've singled me out as I haven't said much different from others.

Original poster
jarhead123 · 22/05/2017 19:25

Thank you for your replies.

Glad I am not being unreasonable!

Nothing I can do about it, it's a very small company and no HR department. Barely any 'procedures' in place. So unless I didn't want to return, I need to let it slide.

OP posts:
Doobigetta · 22/05/2017 19:37

As others have said, it's normal, but you can suggest an alternative venue if you don't want them in your house. They should bring an HR person or other manager with them so you don't have to be on your own with them, and you can have someone with you as well.