To report work place touching.....

[caffeineandcalpol]

So I don't usually work Saturday's , but I was short staffed today and went in to cover, it's pretty quiet and chilled on a Saturday so not as many people rushing around etc. Anyway I walked through the office today carry an awkward object so my hands were full. I walked past the printer where a girl was picking up some paperwork and making general chit chat to a guy from another department , as I walked past (narrow walk way) the guy she was talking too very slyly and gently tickled my thigh in a way the meant he slightly lifted my dress at the same time, and like I say I was also trying to manoeuvre through the office with what I was carrying. I was in shock, I looked back and he didn't bat an eyelid. AIBU to report this ?

You didn't shout 'WTF ARE YOU DOING' or 'DON'T TOUCH ME'? I would report it if you think he meant to do it, but if also make it clear it was an unwelcome thing at the time.

You didn't shout 'WTF ARE YOU DOING' or 'DON'T TOUCH ME'?

It wasn't the OP's responsibility to do so. People react in many different ways to this kind of thing, often saying nothing for a variety of reasons.

Definitely report it if you feel comfortable doing so caffeineandcalpol.

but if also make it clear it was an unwelcome thing at the time

Who on earth would think it was welcome?!!

Report. Sheesh, what a jerk! How is he still employed in this decade?

Who on earth would think it was welcome?!!

Exactly; I'm sure he was well aware it'd be unwelcome which I expect was part of the reason he did it.

stilletos op, next time you will be in his vicinity...or engineer a next time, he will do something similar .....you will accidentally step back/sideways on his foot with all your weight...and not rush to move.

Or if you need flats at work, give him his opportunity, then whizz around accidentally kneeing him hard in the groin....

Absolutely report. You don't need to resort to entertaining devious ways to "get your own back", you report him to your HR or boss for a sexual assault.

"Dear HR,

At work on Saturday, X lifted my dress and put his hand on my upper thigh in a deliberate manner while I was passing him in a narrow space by the photocopier. I was so shocked at the time, that I did not confront him, and I am reporting it to you now.

Y was there at the time as well, but the space was so confined that I doubt she saw anything.

This is the first time I have encountered sexual harassment or any kind of unwanted sexual touching in the workplace before, and I hope that you will be able to handle this appropriately.

I look forward to your response.

Best,

Caffeine"

(Appropriately isn't quite the word I want here - I'm not sure.)

What that poster said! Report it - sexual assault!

Thank you for the reply. My fear is that no one witnessed this , and there are no cameras so it's his word against mine and how awkward would it be if he denies it and I'm left having to see him every day ??

I would rather awkwardness than run the risk that he feels he can repeat it.

Yup, report, report, report. Even if you aren't believed, he'll know he can't target you, and the next time someone reports it they will be believed. You might even BE that next one, because someone may have reported him already.

If you don't report it, he'll know he can molest you and you won't report it.

That's understandable caffeine. I think first and foremost the most important thing is you're comfortable doing whatever you do. If you feel able to report it then do but don't feel bad if you don't. He deserves to be reported but I can see why you're concerned.

It's abhorrent he's put you in this situation as so many women are in all sorts of places. This demonstration of power, revelling in making you uncomfortable knowing it's difficult for you to report it.

It's like I'm arguing with myself over reporting it. I'm a manager at my place I'd work but not in his department so I also feel ridiculous for not saying anything. I might speak to his line manager and tell him to have a quiet word

I eventually reported an incident to my manager after a guy I worked with kept harassing me.

Sorry that this is a little long winded.

It started that he followed me after work (going to public transport) by waiting for me to leave the office. I would try to avoid by hiding in the toilets until he'd gone. He made me feel very uncomfortable. Eventually one time I was walking with a friend, also from work, and stalker colleague suddenly stepped out from the shadows about 5 minutes away from work as he'd been waiting for me at the point where my friend and I divided to go our separate ways! He, unfortunately, went the same way I did.

He also borrowed money off me by pressurising me/guilt tripping me because he'd run out before pay day and didn't have money for the bus. Getting him to repay was difficult and awkward.

It all culminated in him inappropriately touching me. One day, he touched my leg in a very obvious way. I mean we were facing each other on office chairs as we worked in the same large double cubicle and had turned round from our desks to face each other. I had my legs crossed. We were talking about something to do with work and he suddenly sort of leant in and slowly stroked up my leg on the shin of my upper crossed leg. It was slow but also quick (in that I was not expecting it). He also didn't show he'd done it in his eyes or body language. It was freaky and made me feel so violated.

I asked to talk to my line manager who was also his LM. She believed me immediately. I told her about the other things and it turned out that other people has complained to her about him asking to borrow money off them and not paying it back easily. So, she sorted it all out. She had a word with him and moved me to a different desk/cubicle. I ignored him as much as was possible but was still civil.

I am glad I reported it. I would suggest doing what you said about talking to his LM, especially seeing as you are a manager yourself. I feel these men think that we won't say anything as we wonder if they did it or if people would believe us. It is also perhaps not the first time he's done it.