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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU - friends keep slating England!

66 replies

orangeflower11 · 19/05/2017 06:26

DH has friends who are really lovely people but they keep going on and on about how awful England is!

Part of the "motivation" is that they want us to move to where they are. But there are NO jobs - we've politely explained numerous times that our workplaces are filled with people from where they are who have moved.

But at first it was just how beautiful where they are is. It is but no more lovely than the English countryside. Then it was other random stuff. Then they somehow got the impression England is a vice filled den of crime and started going on about how we'd be safer where they are

It sounds like a non problem but it's really quite rude and I'm fed up of it! AIBU?

OP posts:

metalmum15 · 19/05/2017 09:09

hackmum OP said they are in the UK, but not England. So, presumably Scotland, Wales or Ireland. Who'd want to live there, eh?

ravenmum · 19/05/2017 09:21

The thing is, any country has its good and bad points. It's really not something you can defend. I could say that Germany, where I live, has lovely countryside, mostly well-behaved people on the streets and all that, but there are still going to be some idiots spouting Nazi crap and polluted, ugly corners of any city.

Anyone who puts an entire country down should just be ignored, as it is a stupid generalisation. Trying to defend your country is just stooping down to the same level.

NB the US equivalent of Radio 4 is, I believe, NPR, if their podcasts are anything to go by. And the Jeremy Kyle Show is, I believe, British :)

LaPharisienne · 19/05/2017 09:22

It could be well meant because they're having a great time and want to share it with you.

specialsubject · 19/05/2017 09:28

Having done some repping, it is my theory that there is only one lot of good weather and it is shared between the med and the UK. If it was lovely abroad, arrivals would comment on the rain when they left. If it was raining on arrival it was lovely in the UK!

There are no perfect places to live. There are some total shitholes but most countries have good points.

mollyminniemo · 19/05/2017 09:29

I had similar- good friends met an American girl, they then have moved back to the states. Thing is he was really happy here before this- hates hot weather (they live in LA), hates anything flashy, loves the UK Indie scene, British food, etc etc -yet now they feel the need to post long public posts about how much better they feel the US is to raise their young DD than the UK. Seriously grates.

user1492679224 · 19/05/2017 09:36

I love England. I love where I live even though it is one of the most deprived areas in England. The people are kind and friendly, the countryside is beautiful. It's the best! :)

Mulledwine1 · 19/05/2017 09:43

The weather thing is interesting. I follow a guy on Twitter (a German in Australia, a geographer) who tweets interesting maps. Over the last few days he has tweeted the following:

rainfall rates in Europe - believe it or not, England is not the highest, or even close!

average temperature: Ireland and the UK have among the average highest temperatures in Europe - the problem is, it doesn't seem to get away from the average temp :)

and not weather related but

unemployment rates in Europe (England, and indeed the whole of the UK, has one of the lowest)

JoandMax · 19/05/2017 09:49

It is very rude of them especially considering the fact they've never even lived there! I would call them out in t and say actually you're really happy and have no plans to move so let's not talk about it anymore.

We're expats and neither DH or I have any desire to move back to the UK - we just smile and change the subject whenever people ask us why we don't move back (which happens a lot........)

shinyredbus · 19/05/2017 09:51

Sounds like they are tying to convince themselves where they are IS better. Probably want to move here secretly but can't, so better to slate it. I have friends like this, and while I think where they live is lovely - it isn't as lovely as England and I wouldn't move, just my opinion though. Wouldn't say anything rude about someone's else country - don't know why some people do! So rude imo.

HappyLabrador · 19/05/2017 10:12

Anyone who thinks England is shit has the right to piss off and never come back (Good riddance), or - if they've never even been here - don't ever come here (double good riddance).

Deathraystare · 19/05/2017 10:19

Amen to that Happy Labrador!

NoLoveofMine · 19/05/2017 10:28

People (including the English) do seem to think it's okay to say awful things about England, I don't know why

I agree. I recall talking to someone who'd moved here from America not long ago who said the only thing she didn't like about England was how many people moaned about everything to do with it.

I've been to quite a few countries around the world and have family who live in America; never been to anywhere I like more than England and London is by far my favourite place in the world. There's so much to love about the country itself; London's incredible but there are many other beautiful and exciting cities too, much of the countryside is beautiful, pubs are great, the BBC, because it's not too big you can get away for a weekend and be in somewhere the culture is quite different to where you live, the NHS (for now...), and so many inspiring women who've impacted the whole world (Rosalind Franklin, Ada Lovelace, many more), theatre is I think the best there is, music likewise, I could go on. I couldn't see myself wanting to live anywhere else.

Something else I love is how many people move here and add so much to the country. My next door neighbours are Australian, on my road there are a German, American and a French family. They all absolutely love it and I love that they do.

NoLoveofMine · 19/05/2017 10:30

rainfall rates in Europe - believe it or not, England is not the highest, or even close!

This is true. If taken geographically, the south of England would be very low, but even as a whole average rainfall is actually nowhere near the highest. I think in the UK people tend to complain every time it rains and make out that it always does, forgetting when the previous week has been dry.

BathroomOnTheBroom · 19/05/2017 10:34

They're Welsh aren't they?

(I say this as a Welsh person living in England.)

It's a rather tedious jingoistic thing that is prevalent in some areas. My parents are English but have lived in Wales 40+ years. I was born and brought up there but left at 18. I was sick of being told that not having a valleys accent meant I was posh/stuck up/sais etc.

Of course, not all Welsh etc etc

nina2b · 19/05/2017 10:41

People do this to try to make themselves feel better about their country, I feel. It is childish and transparent.

AceholeRimmer · 19/05/2017 12:40

My inlaws live abroad because the dad is foreign and loves his country.. which is fair enough as it's beautiful (but in the Middle East so has its own problems) His mum is British and so all her kids have lived in both places, and chosen to settle in the UK as adults. His dad is always going on about how shitty England is, the weather etc. Always trying to persuade his kids to move abroad. Well you shouldn't have married an English woman should you..

Also agree with others here that Brits are so self depreciating too! I worked abroad for a while and others nationalities are so proud of their countries. They also all become friends easily and follow their countries traditions together. They were all able to big it up without coming across as boasting.

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