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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Should I say something to school?

41 replies

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/05/2017 21:38

Not so much an AIBU but a WWYD.

DD4 is Y1 and was star of the week this week. She was very excited and very proud, as was I. We go to the assembly, she gets her certificate and all is well except the teacher got her name wrong!

Say her name is Jane Smith Jones, the teacher wrote Jane Jones Smith. DD isnt exactly upset but is a bit confused, I am quite bothered by the fact that a teacher she has had since Xmas (Mat leave cover) doesnt seem to know what her name is. All she had to do was check the register, the peg names, her books...its not hard to do surely?

Do I let it go or say something? I dont want to come across as petty but equally it does bug me.

OP posts:

NotYoda · 19/05/2017 05:32

To answer your question- not it's not unreasonable to expect it should have the right name, but it's unreasonable to get upset about it and believe it means something more (in the absence of other evidence) than it does

NotYoda · 19/05/2017 05:32

Trifle

I know!

Squishedstrawberry4 · 19/05/2017 06:20

We would just laugh about that sort of thing in our house.

MrsDustyBusty · 19/05/2017 06:28

I remember the first day my oldest started Reception. The name tags on his coat peg and drawer in the classroom were spelled wrong. Normal name; no unusual spelling. I took them off the wall and the drawer and handed them to the teacher and asked her to redo them. Teacher was embarrassed. Couldn't even copy the register correctly.

I'm sure if you don't approach the teacher with this attitude, she won't mind at all.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 19/05/2017 06:38

I'm a teacher. I know the surnames of all of my children but would need the register to write some of them down (long tricky spellings). That's all well and good and I will do that for certificates but sometimes the register is wrong. I have a girl whose first name is, say Lily on the register but she actually spells it Lilly. I know the correct spelling, her books, drawer and peg say the correct spelling but the register says the wrong spelling.

(I also have children in Y5 who can't spell their own surname.)

I'm also a mum though and, when I went to see DD's nursery, they'd got her DOB wrong by one day. I pointed it out immediately and the woman was mortified but I understand that mistakes happen and told her that we're all human. I tried to reassure her that I was not angry about it. This is the second admin error they have made. I rang up about the first one and asked the note in the front of her home contact book to be changed. They had addressed it "To the grandparents of..." not the parents. My DM and DF mostly pick DD up because DP and I are at work but they will most certainly not be writing in the book. I or my DP will as we are her parents. That one annoyed me more than the DOB.

friendlessfred · 19/05/2017 06:58

I work in primary schools. I'm not a teacher, but I talk to teachers all the time. NONE of them know the surnames of the children in their class

How on earth not? They see the surnames on the register, on books and on coat pegs every day surely?

Feenie · 19/05/2017 07:04

Why would surnames be on coat pegs and books?

SandyDenny · 19/05/2017 07:15

I'd be very concerned if a teacher didn't know the surnames of any of the children in the class. If that's true the teacher should be thoroughly ashamed and I'd question their capability. How would that even be possible?

In your case OP I'd ask for a new certificate if it bothers you but not make a big thing is it.

jamdonut · 19/05/2017 07:19

Just don't go in angry about it!
Inexplicable errors occur, particularly if you do things in a hurry!
I do my teacher's certificates because my handwriting is "nicer".
It doesn't matter how well I know the children and I do look at the register lists, errors creep in from time to time. Especially if it is a common name with an unusual spelling. Eg all the different spellings of Emily, Teagan, Jackson,Zac....
Please don't be offended.

And the times I forget children's surnames! Senior moments...

ShinyGirl · 19/05/2017 07:24

Double barrelled names are a PITA

QueenOfAllBiscuitsandMuffins · 19/05/2017 07:25

Just by bringing it up you will be that parent. Seriously? Your daughter is confused?
I have a DD in Yr1 if her surname is spelt wrong (which isn't unusual, lots of people spell it wrong) then unless it's on something like a cheque or holiday confirmation/passport we just shrug and move on because it's really really not a big deal.

However I say this as someone who thinks having to give out multiple certificates every week is a complete waste of teachers time and effort (and trees and admin time)

friendlessfred · 19/05/2017 07:30

Feenie because they are at the schools that my DCs are at/have been it.

kimlo · 19/05/2017 07:33

dd2 got on in reception that instead of being firstname-secondname, was just secondname. I mentioned it to her teacher and she appologised and it hasn't happened since. To be fair my friends son is in her class and his name is firstname-secondname but she only calls him firstname and his Dad only uses secondname.

Year 2 sats was also when we discovered that dd2 couldn't spell her first name. She goes by a shorted version and had never had to write it down before. So he teacher told her how to write it down, but she spelt it wrong as well, but its a name that everybody spells wrong. I picked her up one day and the children were being ticked off a list as they left and the ta couldn't find her on the list because she didn't know that the name she knew her by wasn't the name on the register.

I didn't realise until she started school that I had given dd2 such a complicated name.

Original poster

PyongyangKipperbang · 19/05/2017 10:07

I wasnt planning on storming in there and ramming it up her nose!

I was just going to mention it and see if the teacher could do a new one. DD is a bit non plussed by it as it means a lot to her, if she wasnt bothered then I wouldnt say anything. I have had a good relationship with the school since DD1 started there 15 years ago and have had at least one child there ever since so I am not going ruin that over one small mistake.

OP posts:

Original poster

PyongyangKipperbang · 19/05/2017 10:09

Why would surnames be on coat pegs and books?

To help them learn to recognise and spell it?

Double barrelled names are a PITA

Not sure what the point of that comment is, but thanks anyway

OP posts:

EweAreHere · 19/05/2017 17:37

I'm sure if you don't approach the teacher with this attitude, she won't mind at all.

Don't know what you're on about. I asked politely and I smiled. Said it happens. She was embarrassed, yes, but only because it had happened. Not because of 'how' I said it. The teacher and I were just fine ... my child quickly became a favourite of hers because he knew how to behave and did what was asked of him.

Yes, I get cranky that names can't even be copied from the register correctly, but I didn't say that. And I have to work with registers in my class all the bloody time, and I know to be careful.

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