My DD was mean and didn't care...

[Notcool1984]

At soft play. DD nearly four bumps into another girl from her nursery and they play well. Then (and I witness) my DD refusing to share and then shouting in the face of the other little girl who was left visibly upset. I took my DD off the soft play told her off and spoke to her, trying to get her to show empathy towards the other girl, who was left in tears. To my horror my DD was laughing about this and refused to say sorry. Where have I go wrong? What should I do? WWYD in this situation? Take her home? I am worried I am too soft :(

'Share' can sometimes really mean 'give me that!'

^^This.

DD2 will run in saying "DD1 isn't sharin' 'n' carin' like at my pre-school!"

No, DD2, she just didn't give it to you the minute you asked for it. Wait.

I'd also have taken her out OP. And I have done with DD2 who can verge on the unpleasant sometimes.

I think there is some kind of regression happens at that age. My dd was good at sharing at a younger age and then started in the me, me, me stuff. And I can see my dgd starting that too, when it was never a problem before.

is a great little book for reinforcing the themes of empathy/ kindness/ sharing etc.

"Have you filled a bucket today?" by Carol McCloud

Former nanny, read it often with small kids I worked with, and it really opens up conversations about thinking of how another person feels!

Agree with PPs: your DD's still very much on the learning curve at nearly 4yrs. She'll get there, with your guidance and regular reminders.

I'd have told her we are leaving.

Thank you everyone for your reassuring words and offering some good advice!