Single mum. Do I need to prebook flight seats ?

[Blinkyblink]

Trying to get through to Monarch. The less said about that the better.

I'm travelling alone with my 6 and 4 year old. Our first holiday as a new family of 3. I'm on a careful budget and would rather not have to pay the £30 to prebook us. However the thought of my 4 year old (not a chance my 6 year old would be ok on his own) could be separately seated from me is somewhat concerning! Surely single adults travelling with children are seated with the children??

In the absence of Monarch customer service actually providing any customer service, please could someone clarify.

Thanks very much

Why are there so many truly vile people on here, who think it is ok to ignore a child in distress?

The parent is the vile one in this situation, because they wouldn't pay to sit next to their child. They obviously don't think it important enough and are happy to see said child in distress.

Either that, or they're happy enough to be entitled and selfish to think other people should move for them.

Why are there so many truly vile people on here, who think it is ok to ignore a child in distress?

I am not a vile person, but equally I am not unpaid childcare. If I am flying solo I use flights to nap so I'm rested (as I'm usually flying either for work or to attend an event). If I'm flying with my DD, I am usually busy as she, like I used to, has a lot of issues with her ears and occasionally it is really painful for her trying to equalise the pressure on take off/landing. So she sometimes gets stressed and anxious until we're up in the air and then she's absolutely fine for the rest of the flight.

I have no obligation to care for a child that I am not travelling with just because they are seated next to me because their accompanying adult didn't want to pay to ensure they were seated together.

I would never demand a stranger give up £20 or whatnot without offering to at least compensate him or her

Absolutely this.

'Why are there so many truly vile people on here, who think it is ok to ignore a child in distress? '

Because I didn't pay to book my seats to accommodate those too cheap to do so. Do you feel entitled to approach total strangers and tell them, 'Give me £20/£30/whatever out of your wallet because I have a child?' If I travel solo I do so knowing I'll be drugged up, hence, I book a window so I can go to sleep, I don't sign up to be a babysitter. Usually, however, when going solo, I book in the emergency exit aisles so I don't get bothered with entitled people who think they deserve my seat for free.

DH, DD and I flew business on Emirates once and were allocated three completely separate seats. (Really overbooked flight) DD was just two and there was no way she could have coped, she wouldn't even stay in her seat for take off without me holding her down. Cabin crew asked really nicely if the single people sitting next to our seats would swap but both flatly refused. I was almost in tears.

A really nice guy and his wife a few rows up overheard and volunteered to sit separately so DD and I could sit together. They got upgraded to first class! Was absolutely brilliant.

If you don't want to pay to pre book keep in mind that adults don't want tonne say with a child ... especially unaccompanied .. if ou are separated, ask the adults if they would mind swapping seats so they could sit with adults and you with your DC .. wouldn't be an issue with me

That's happened to us, Karma. Flight was so booked up at the time we bought the ticket, months in advance, that my daughter was in the aisle behind us, a middle one on a 747, and I sat with my son who has ASD, bang smack in the middle of a middle row. I made do the best I could, not demand others move. Said, 'Sorry, that's my daughter there, so I'll get up to help her when she needs it. Tried to get altogether but it wasn't possible.' And because I was polite, they were very kind, she was already 8 so didn't need much assistance, but kicking up a fuss and demanding others move isn't going to endear people to your plight. That was a 10 hour flight.

Have also been on shorter ones where we were sat one child in back of me, one in front and my husband with ASD child several rows away, again, it happens. Stropping just pisses people off. As they were middle seats, no one offered to swap. I don't consider them vile for that, perhaps they have very good reasons for where they were sitting - plenty of adults have special needs and medical conditions, too.

CAA rules state children under 12 should be sat with an accompanying adult, no more than an aisle apart. Simon Calder has quoted it time and again - it is a way for airlines to make money. His advice is to take it up with staff at the desk if your child under 12 is not seated next to/across an aisle from an adult.

I know this is easier said than done - the last thing anyone wants is a row at the beginning of their holiday - but that is guidance from the CAA, which all airlines should be following.

I do understand why people pay to pre-book, but if it's solely for the purpose of sitting with a child under 12, you really shouldn't have to. It's a safety precaution as much as anything (as previous posters have said) - if cabin pressure drops and oxygen masks are needed, it isn't acceptable to expect a stranger to assist a child. Or if they are sick on the flight. A fact ably supported by the number of people who have said it wouldn't be their problem (not having a go, just restating what's been said).

There are lots of threads about this on here. They can and they will split you up. If others have paid to sit together, they can't make them move to accommodate you. I always book when flying with DD. It's annoying, but I'd rather not take the chance and I certainly wouldn't expect people who'd paid for seats together to move.

I think my favourite thread about this had one poster saying that if people refused to move for her child she would make them sign an affidavit that they would look after her child.

If I'm flying alone then I don't pre-book, and wouldn't particularly mind moving. But when I travel with the DC then I do pre-book and obviously wouldn't leave my small children to accommodate someone else.

The problem is that if you are flying package in school holidays then 90% of the plane will be filled with families with young children. So less people in a position to move even if they were feeling generous.

I think the comments about ignoring a potentially vomitting child were in response to the poster who suggested using a sick bag as a threat to get you to move. Personally I would call over a stewardess and tell them that the parent thinks the child has a vomitting bug and so they shouldn't be on the flight..... But I don't like being blackmailed.

Being handed a bag for a child sat next to me and being told be prepared if they're sick wouldn't phase me. I've dealt with worse. I wouldn't be moving for the sake of my nervous flying DH but I also wouldn't be horrible to the child it's not their fault the parent wouldn't pay to be seated next to them.
I would be thinking you were an entitled asshole though, for a kid half the fun is the flight and being sat next to a stranger is not fun for most.
Just pre book for the sake of your kids, do you really want the most memorable part of the holiday for them to be 'mummy got into an arguement on the flight because she thought we should have the seats and then everyone was mad at us'

I was once on a flight it was an easy jet and basicly first come first serve so I made dam sure my husband and I were first in the queue for check in so we got priority boarding.
At the gate after the priority boarding they then asked for familys with kids to board next to make sure they got seats together.
Low and behold the last to arrive at the gate was a family of five with a mum, dad and three kids under 7 I would say.
They got on the plane and the dad starts kicking off that they are not sat together.
Two people offer to move so the mum could sit with two of the kids and the dad with the other (or vice versa) but at different parts of the plane.
The dad still kicks off that they all want to sit together, points at my husband and says some people are so selfish not moving.
So I stand up and inform him that I have seizures, so unless he wants to deal with those seizures instead of my husband to pipe down and sit down.
I also point out that they were last in the queue and that was their choice and it was their own selfish behaviour that meant they were sat apart from each other and nearly ended up away from their kids.
I also added that I am bet the airport had to put a call out for them at least twice.
He went very red, sat down and shut up and some people actually applauded.
So no I don't consider myself vile for not moving to accommodate someone like that who would rather sit in the airport bar for another 10 minutes then make sure they were at the gate when the plane started boarding. (I could smell the alcohol on his breath he got that close to me).
My husband and I usually manage a holiday abroad every year but things are quite tight and we save where we can but one thing I would never risk is not paying to make sure we are sat together, especially now we have DS.
As someone said you would not walk up to someone and ask for 30 quid out of their purse because you have kids and they don't.
Same thing, if someone else had paid for the seats they are entiled to them

Not sure about the seat part, but seen a few posts about issues going away with kids with different surnames or without 'dad', maybe double check the airlines/destination countries policies on this and see if you need a letter from their dad, or if you need to take birth certificate etc.

I think my favourite thread about this had one poster saying that if people refused to move for her child she would make them sign an affidavit that they would look after her child.

I'd sign with the words FUCK OFF.

I'm ex industry too and would never take off with a family seperated. We would simply move around passengers until it was resolved. It is a matter of safety, not service.

Okay, fine. Then make it compulsory for people travelling with young children to book seats next to them. And if that attracts an extra fee, make it compulsory for them to pay that fee.

I travel solo a lot, and already spend a lot more per head than families/couples for hotel rooms, single supplements, etc. Don't ask me to move to accommodate families who won't pay a supplement to sit together. It's completely unfair, and amounts to emotional blackmail.

Absolutely Koala.

I'd sign with the words FUCK OFF.

Either that or rip it up.

Martin Lewis did a thing about this. By law you have to be seated by your children.

All this pre booking is a scam and those that think people are cheap not to do it must be a bit thick imo.

These threads always seem to descend in an exercise of who is the most callous and selfish

Actually, I'm the mug who always does swap seats for the 'distressed' child. Who 90% of the time doesn't seem to care, btw (it's the parents who are flipping out).

But I'm sick of it. It's the airlines displacing the issue onto an innocent party (me), in order to appease parents, who neither want to pay nor be inconvenienced.

By law you have to be seated by your children.

Really? Interesting. Which law?

Taken from the Cival Aviation Airline website....

Airlines are expected to sit family groups together when they check-in for their flight, either at the desk in the terminal or in advance at home online. This is particularly the case if the group contains a child under 12, who should be seated in the same seat row segment as an accompanying adult. If this is not possible for any reason then the child has to be seated no more than one seat row away.

Regulators, such as the CAA, fully expect airlines to comply with this rule, and, to be fair, check-in staff and cabin crew generally do everything they can to accommodate family groups. Passengers can of course pay for reserved seating if they so wish, but families travelling together should be aware that they do not actually need to.'

1. That's a CAA rule, not a law.

1. 'One seat row away' is not 'next to', by any stretch, and would not be acceptable to most parents.