This is less of a 'back to work' as I have been back nearly 2 years but couldn't find a better category.
So since I came back from my last mat leave 2 yrs ago, my role changed. The guy who had previously been a team colleague/equal and had been asked to cover my account while I was gone, became one of a small team I was put in charge of.
So he's 10 years older, was an equal, I left for 9 months and came back as his line manager - and he's a he. I get it, I'd be a bit miffed too if someone disappeared for 9 months and then came back as my boss. He's a bit old school too, leaders should be male etc. I'm sure he has a chip on his shoulder about that.
I may be younger but I've actually been working in this field and with this customer for a decade, him (field for 3-4 years, this customer 2) so I legitimately have more experience and established relationships with the customers. I don't feel ill placed in my role, it was a natural and earned progression.
It has been a nightmare. He won't do anything I ask him without asking him multiple times. I don't enjoy it. I have no weird pleasure in nagging. He procrastinates and avoids anything I ask him about or to do - even if not doing said thing makes his life harder, not mine. It's hard to give lots of examples without this becoming an epic first post.
It's getting me so down. I dread walking into the office. I never know what mood he'll be in. It's also making me doubt everything about myself, what I say, how I come across, body language etc. No one else seems to have a problem with me though.
I need advice on how to manage him!
I have tried to read up research and articles for guidance (most say you have to earn their respect and I honestly think I've worked the way most of these articles describe, but hard to know how I come across for certain) but would prefer some real life wisdom and first hand experience.
Anyone been through this?