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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be so upset about this

33 replies

Porkpudding · 16/05/2017 22:39

I had a phonecall off my 10 year old sons school yesterday to say another parent has phoned the police on him for an incident that happened at school! Basically him and his friends were recreating a scene out of the avengers film and my son accidentally hit one of his friends in the face. He immediately apologised and his friend accepted it and they carried on playing normally afterwards. The school day ended as normal but his teacher informed me that his mother had gone straight to the police to make a formal complaint about my son!

Nothing has been said to the teachers or myself about this and she hadn't attempted to get my sons side of the story. My son isn't perfect but I haven't had a problem with him being spiteful or nasty to anyone previously. His teacher says he is a good child and is usually very kind to others but like all kids he can be silly sometimes.

My son is so upset and is making himself that physically sick over it that he didn't go to school today as he was being sick with worry. I have since found out that the police dont want to interview him or take it further.

Am I unreasonable to think this is an extreme over reaction. If the parents had contacted me I would have tried to
get to the bottom of it and wouldn't have immediately taken my sons side. I have 4 boys and they are always coming home complaining about being knocked, teased etc but I never just take their word for it and would go to the teachers/parents if I had concerns.
Am I unreasonable to think this could have been dealt with better and what do I say to my terrified son. I'm not minimising what he done or the fact that his friend got hurt by his actions by the way.

OP posts:
Optimist1 · 16/05/2017 22:46

I agree the parent over-reacted, but thank goodness the police have put her right. Your son will probably be a lot more careful in future (no criticism intended; typical behaviour of adolescent boys who misjudge the consequences of over-enthusiastic play) and should be relieved that this episode is now closed.

Allthebestnamesareused · 16/05/2017 22:50

I bet the mother is a mumsnetter who posted in here and was told that is assault - call the police!

Total overreaction by her! Hope DS is okay now.

Original poster
Porkpudding · 17/05/2017 07:29

Thanks all, I've dealt with far worse and have never dreamt of calling the police on a child! He's still upset but due to return to school today!

OP posts:
Original poster
Porkpudding · 17/05/2017 14:14

Shamelessly bumping

OP posts:
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 17/05/2017 14:18

Allthebest probably Grin

Your poor lad OP. He's been the unlucky one in a million this sort of thing must happen to. Most parents do not overreact like that.

I'd keep reiterating to him that accidents happen, he was unfortunate and he did the right thing in apologising but then moving on, and that's obviously what the police think about it too.

PeaFaceMcgee · 17/05/2017 14:20

What a kind boy you have, to be so worried about the possible consequences of his mistake. Stupid mother.

TheRealPooTroll · 17/05/2017 14:36

I wouldn't have even told my son about the police being involved tbh.
Presumably the police contacted the school if the mum didn't and the child was fine with no injury and the school/police don't feel the need to do anything? No need to have worried your son so much about another parent completely overreacting about an accident. I would have asked my child what happened, told him to be more careful and left it at that.

Original poster
Porkpudding · 17/05/2017 14:40

The police were called to the school and told the teacher and me to prepare my child for a interview later that day! The interview didn't happen in the end! The child didn't have a mark on him!

OP posts:
TheRealPooTroll · 17/05/2017 14:44

How ridiculous. I'd make sure the school are aware of how this has affected your son.

OfaFrenchmind2 · 17/05/2017 14:46

Did he try to be the Hulk punching out Thor? 😁
Don't worry OP, she was overreacting and silly. (Just make sure that it really happened as your son said it did)

Wando1986 · 17/05/2017 14:47

What kind of dickhead parent calls the police because their kid got hit during a game? It's not like he chased him down and beat him with both fists Confused

pheebo · 17/05/2017 14:48

Wow isn't the mother just an absolute fuckwit?! She should have been told off for wasting police time!
Imagine the poor kids embarrassment when he gets older 😳 she's going to be a fucking nightmare!!

GotToGetMyFingerOut · 17/05/2017 14:52

When were tey playing the game when the boy accidentally got hit?

GotToGetMyFingerOut · 17/05/2017 14:52

*they

LorLorr2 · 17/05/2017 14:53

What?!
...what???
WHAT did I just read.

Why did the police even consider an interview in the first place and give her a minute of their time?
Absolutely bonkers. Reporting a playground hit to the bloody police!!

I'm sat here like ShockShock

FrenchMartiniTime · 17/05/2017 14:54

Complete over reaction!

That mum sounds a little Hmm

Glad everything has been cleared up. I bet your sons friend was mortified!

Dadstheworld · 17/05/2017 15:02

I'm more surprised by the police turning up than I am about them being called TBH

TwitterQueen1 · 17/05/2017 15:06

There's nothing to get to the bottom of here, OP. For your son's sake, don't make this anything other than it is - an accident in the playground where no-one was hurt or bullied or upset.

Ignore the utter stupidity of the other parent.

HappyFlappy · 17/05/2017 15:10

I think that when they are called the police have to be seen to respond even though it's obviously just a bit of horseplay that resulted in an accident. Accidents happen - child wasn't seriously injured, and the game continued (probably more carefully).

Your poor son has had an awful fright though - most mothers would just say to be more careful in the furure.

childmaintenanceserviceinquiry · 17/05/2017 15:16

My view on this is that it happened during school time so the police should only have come if the school called them. I can understand the other parent being upset and perhaps her son is injured - bruising on the face can look awful. So she called the police. Did she even try to find out from school what happened first? But I am surprised that the police have reacted as they did. I think they have overstepped the mark.

I would wait to see if she speaks to you at all. You said the boys were friends. Sounds like primary school so you may see her at school gate. Do prepare a couple of responses in advance so matter what she says to you, you are able to get your point of view over.

Original poster
Porkpudding · 17/05/2017 15:18

The teachers were shocked by the woman's reaction and the fact the police turned up they actually said they have called them out previously for vandalism and they didn't even come out! It really was a game which happened at break time and the boys carried on as normal afterwards!

OP posts:
Allthewaves · 17/05/2017 15:18

What did the school say

Original poster
Porkpudding · 17/05/2017 15:21

The school didn't call the police or agree with the police being called

OP posts:
Winterc00kie · 17/05/2017 15:22

She needs to get done for wasting police time!?

She sounds bat shit crazy to be honest with a sprinkle of Munchausen

ClarkWGriswold · 17/05/2017 15:26

Hopefully the police warned her about wasting police time. What a silly cow.

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