Over a happy birthday message

[Summerisdone]

Today is ex's birthday. He sent me a passive aggressive text this morning at 9am because I hadn't called him for DS to wish him a happy birthday.
I text back an hr later that I had been in work since 8.30 which means me having to leave the house at 7.30, this morning I overslept and didn't wake until 7.10; this left me with 20 minutes to get myself and my 2 year old ready and see to the dog, hence the reason why I hadn't called ex but I was going to text him as soon as I got five mins in work to let him know I'll get DS to wish him a happy birthday this evening.

He responded with a text how I'm a spiteful selfish bitch and at the very least it would have been thoughtful of me to send a text for him to wake up to. He also said he doesn't even want a call tonight now as he'll be seeing son in the morning anyway so pointless calling at 6 in the evening.

So WIBU I'm not texting him given the circumstances, and if so was it so unreasonable that it warranted such angry texts from him?

[NoncommittalToSparkleMotion]

What a wankstain.

I'm surprised you had to go to work on this momentous national day of celebration.

He's a dick. Life has probably been too quiet for him and I'd looking to stir shit.

[buttfacedmiscreant]

i'd reply back in a non-emotional manner with something like "ok" it will piss him off more than arguing back.

[buttfacedmiscreant]

oh and in future I wouldn't explain any further than "if you want to speak to your son on your birthday then you should call him."

[Summerisdone]

Well I've not responded all day since he started with the nasty texts and he's just sent me another text:

I'm still really pissed about this morning. I understand that you didn't have time for a call but can you honestly not see that at least a text from my son would have been nice. I'm going out now anyway so X *can't phone me so I'll just see him in the morning.
Make sure he is ready as I don't want to be hanging around.
*
That's what I've just had, I really feel like he's blowing things out of proportion and acting more like we're in a relationship and I didn't acknowledge his birthday
I feel like he was wanting a happy birthday off me rather than DS because it's not like he can send a text at the age of two, so clearly anything sent would have had nothing to do with DS and been from me.

Well I'm not responding to him anyway, I can't be bothered getting into anything with him, especially if he's going out because he'll only get nastier once he's had a drink.

[BigGrannyPants]

Make sure you keep all these texts, screen shots. YANBU, your X is an arse.

[Slightlyperturbedowlagain]

Oh so he would rather go out on the piss than celebrate his birthday with his child???

[Justmadeperfectflapjacks]

Did you get much for mothers day from him op?

[Summerisdone]

@BigGrannyPants I keep all texts from him out of habit anyway, because he used to send such vile and nasty messages to me that I started saving them all to my iCloud account in case I needed them for any reason.

@Justmadeperfectflapjacks he text me in the evening on Mother's Day to tell me he had bought a card and flowers on behalf of DS, but said he forgot flowers will be dead by time he next pick DS up and I never saw the card anyway, so technically no I didn't receive anything but according to him the effort was still there (this is what he said in his text with a laughing face)
Tbh though I never expected the effort, although I have always bought a card from son for ex's birthday and Father's Day and will continue to do so until DS is old enough to go in a store and decide for himself if he'd like to use his spends on buying daddy a card.

[kittybiscuits]

Ignore, ignore, ignore ...

[MatildaTheCat]

Tel him that when ds is old enough to send texts you will encourage him to do so but at two, that is not the case. If you sent a text on his behalf it would actually be a message from you. And you are his ex and not on great terms. So no, there was no birthday text from ds to his wonderful, best daddy in the world.

There was a good clip on FB recently from a dad who helped his DC to celebrate his ex's birthday but a) he seemed like a reasonable human and b) they were on good terms.

Let's see what happens on your birthday.

[MinorRSole]

Do you have a very advanced child? My twins are 5 and can't text, although can take 300 million blurry selfies . Maybe mine are defective

[Summerisdone]

@MinorRSole my DS is the exact same, blurry selfies all the time, although if I unlock the phone he can navigate his way around the phone to get to YouTube and the Phone Santa app that I keep forgetting to delete, so he must FaceTime Santa at least once a week
But nope DS is not quite capable of sending a text just yet, which is why sending a birthday text was far from my list of priorities this morning as the text would ultimately have been from me , no matter if I signed it off 'love from DS' .

[Astro55]

You don't have to explain your morning to him - or anything else for that matter!

Don't enter into an argument with him -

You can reason with stupid

[OverOn]

He's treating you as if you're in a relationship - getting arsey over a birthday text!

Next time he gets arsey about anything, just send a simple text back like mentioned above 'ok thanks for the info'. Text what you'd really like to say to him to yourself - found that helped me keep sane when my ex was being an arse.

[Smellbellina]

Your DS is TWO! It's your attention your ex wants, not his son's.

100% this^^

[AyeAmarok]

"he's TWO [ex's name],he can't actually text, you know".

[KC225]

Sounds like he was spoiling for a fight. You don't owe him a text and you don't have make excuses or give reasons as to why you didn't text him. He needs to grow up.

[MidniteScribbler]

"When DS is able to actually type coherent sentences, then I'll happily let him use his initiative and decide to text you for your birthday. Until then, one of the benefits of not being in a relationship with you is not having to deal with your whiney arse in the morning."

[BigGrannyPants]

Love that @MidniteScribbler

[blackteasplease]

The best thing is just "ok" or somethiny equally non committal. Easier said than done but it really pisses them off.

[Summerisdone]

I like that @MidniteScribbler
I may just say this to him when he comes to pick DS up in the morning, if he decides to carry on the moan over not getting an early morning text

[RainbowJack]

Tell him his text is in the same place your card is.

The idiot.