AIBU to let my son kick a ball around outside?

[somedogsdo]

I live in a small house that doesn't really have any useable back garden. It's at the end of a little rural drive/lane. My front door opens directly on to the tarmac area that both I and my neighbours opposite park on. There are usually 3 but can be up to 6 cars out there. It's a private driveway.

My 10 yr old son likes to kick a ball around in front of my house between my house and the parked cars. I've said no to a proper football but have bought him a light weight ball instead which he throws/kicks about on his own.

The ball sometimes hits my house/windows but it's light so not a problem (so far!). But it also occasionally bounces off the parked cars. It doesn't do any damage but I can see that it might be annoying.

My mum looks after my son after school some days whilst I'm working and has said she doesn't want him kicking the ball out there when her car is there. I'm a bit annoyed as I want to encourage him to play outside and be as active as possible - instead of just screen time after school. But I guess I have to respect her wishes.

I've asked my neighbours whether it annoys them and they've said it's fine and also invite him over to play football with their son in their garden (which is huge, complete with goal).

But my mum says it's disrespectful to play with a ball near cars as it's not teaching respect for other people's property.

AIBU to let him play outside like this? We're not close to a park/field and I really want to encourage active/outside play. But I don't want to encourage disrespect. And what about when there are visitor's cars at weekends etc. Am I right to encourage this or is my mum right that I should put a stop to it?

i would be pissed of if it was hitting my car

I think you should put a stop to it.

I agree with your mum. Sorry!

Your mum is right. I can see your frustration with the lack of space but it is disrespectful to kick a ball that will hit cars.

Is the road safe enough for him to kick one about there instead? I wouldn't be happy with any ball hitting my cars, they can pick up dirt and leave scratches. It doesn't take much to scratch paint on modern cars.

YABU.
The kids over the road from me do this (also with a light weight ball)
Please do not let him. The relentless thumping is like torture.
It could probably be described as anti social.

It would annoy me!

Is there anything else he could do outside (and I completely understand why you want him to be outside!)? Bike, scooter, pogo stick sort of things.

YABU - teach your son to have respect for others property and also peace and quiet.

I agree with your mum, too.

I would be annoyed if a ball hit my car.

Your mum is right and I imagine your neighbours are just being polite. The noise alone would drive me insane, please don't allow him to do this anymore. Enroll him in a football club and take him to the nearest park more often instead if possible.

I wouldn't be happy with it tbh. The sound of those flyaway balls hitting off the pavement is horrific enough without it thumping off a car

I'm one of the least precious people about my car, and have always encouraged my kids to play outside, but in my opinion you are being unreasonable to even think of allowing to play with a ball, where it hits other people's cars.

Thanks all - it's good to get your perspectives on this. Maybe I'm annoyed with my mum because secretly I know she's right

Hennaoj - it sort of is the road where's he's playing but as it's a dead end and only services a few houses there is no real traffic. But it is next to the parked cars.

Anyone got any other ideas of anything else I can encourage that is less destructive? Did think about giving him a tennis ball instead but would be worried about broken windows. What do you let your kids do in similar situations?

Doesn't bother me, there are usually 9-10 kids on our street playing football after school, the cars sometimes get hit but I'd rather they be outside than stuck on a screen all evening.

Take him to the bloody park.

I'm afraid I agree with your mum. Sounds like you have lovely neighbours - perhaps you can take them up on their offer and then invite their son back to do an inside activity of some kind?

Regarding outdoors activities, I totally understand where you're coming from, but you need to think of something more appropriate. How about Swingball? That can be one or two players, the ball's going nowhere and it's good for a confined space. Buy one with a base and fill the base with water, then you can simply tip it out to move it back when he's finished.

No I could not allow or feel comfortable with one of my dc's out with a ball that sometimes hits neighbours cars. I would rather drive him to a park with some mates for a kick around instead if there is no grassed area available.
I think your mum is right and I would feel uncomfortable if I was looking after him for you too.
If it was my car, no we would not be pleased about it. I know you say the neighbours said it was fine but maybe they felt too uncomfortable to say differently. We would not be fine with it hitting our car on a regular basis. Does not take much to damage a car these days and does not teach him respect.

What about something like this

The neighbors said OK so I don't see a problem with it, honestly. I'm sure your DS is smart enough to understand the difference between situations where you have permission and those where you don't.

YABU I agree with your mum, and would be very annoyed if a ball hit my car. Take him to the park

You say rural.... so there's really nowhere to play?

I agree with your mum - sorry!

I get that you have a good reason for wanting your DS to be active but do your neighbours know this? It's probable that they think you are really inconsiderate and quite a lax parent (in terms teaching good behaviour) for letting your DS do this.

If your neighbours are anything like me they'll be grinning and bearing it because they don't like confrontation. You're lucky. There are some people who would go mad if a ball kept hitting their car!

YABU I'm afraid. We have children playing football outside of ours by parked cars and I've lost count of the amount of wing mirrors which have been knocked off (even with a lightweight ball). Is there anywhere you can put a kickback board so he's not just randomly kicking it but has something to aim at?

My sister used to let her DS do this outside my house and I was always so embarrased! I think it's thoughtless when people's cars are parked there. They might not want mud all over their vehicle or a ball bouncing on their windows.

Thanks Billy - that's a great idea. I will look into that.

And swing ball was a success for a while last year but he's not so keen this year.

I do take him to the park when I can but we have to drive so it's not always convenient.

Do appreciate all your views - I hadn't realised I was so much in the minority on this. Maybe because I work in health I've got a bit obsessed with keeping children active so good to get other views on this as sounds as though his ball games are probably more annoying than I thought.